Seize Them!
- 2024
- 1h 31m
IMDb RATING
5.1/10
1.2K
YOUR RATING
Dark Ages Britain where Queen Dagan is toppled by a revolution led by Humble Joan. The Queen becomes a fugitive in her own land, and must face hardship and danger as she embarks on a voyage ... Read allDark Ages Britain where Queen Dagan is toppled by a revolution led by Humble Joan. The Queen becomes a fugitive in her own land, and must face hardship and danger as she embarks on a voyage to win back her throne.Dark Ages Britain where Queen Dagan is toppled by a revolution led by Humble Joan. The Queen becomes a fugitive in her own land, and must face hardship and danger as she embarks on a voyage to win back her throne.
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- 1 nomination total
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Featured reviews
Though silly, low budget, period Brit-com "Sieze Them" hits nowhere near the Monty Python heights it aspires to, it has its moments and some nice performances. When unpopular Dark Ages queen Aimee Lou Wood (terrific - one to watch) is overthrown by Nicola Coughlan's peasant army, she's saved by servant Lolly Adefope (also good) who with poop-shoveller Nick Frost helps her escape across country (to allies (or are they?) Paul Kaye & John Macmillan). Andy Riley's screenplay is childishly daft (though is def'ly adults only with its language etc) and Curtis Vowell's direction is basic. This one certainly will not appeal to all, but it has its moments.
If you are British you will understand 'Horrible Histories' made by the BBC that educates children on world history. When it started it was funny, irreverent and informative. These days it has become insufferable catering to 'modern audiences' in terms of casting, theme and content.
I mention this because this film is starring some of those cast members and has the same production values and the same sense of humour, which makes no sense.
The film is cursed with boss babes, cowardly men, predictable humour and much childish nonsenses. So why throw in lots of violence and swearing? Do millennials really have the expectations of seven year olds in modern moviemaking? It would seem so.
I mention this because this film is starring some of those cast members and has the same production values and the same sense of humour, which makes no sense.
The film is cursed with boss babes, cowardly men, predictable humour and much childish nonsenses. So why throw in lots of violence and swearing? Do millennials really have the expectations of seven year olds in modern moviemaking? It would seem so.
Most of this cast are people I really like, I didn't mind it being female led as you had 3 genuinely funny women leading the film, so couldn't see this being bad, then the showtimes came out, it was obvious the cinema saw the film as a flop, so went anyway.
Let's start with James Acaster, from a big role in the new Ghostbusters to this? I mean everything here was unprofessional and weak, if it'd have been a free tv movie on Dave you'd maybe like it more but at nearly £20 a ticket this is disgusting, it shouldn't have got to the screens, luckily I pay subscription.
The script wasn't funny, seemed to want to mimic horrible histories and ghosts kinda sense of humour but nothing landed, the acting was just weak but the script didn't help, there was more groans in the screening I was at. A few chuckles but not enough to excuse paying for this garbage.
This cast could've put together a great movie even with this idea, I'm amazed having nick frost in here, that you'd not get his advice or opinion!
The world was ok, costumes were garbage, endless unnecessary swearing, alot of stuff that didn't fit with time line, just a real mess.
Please don't waste your money on this, free stream or tv then fine but honestly you'll regret wasting a penny on this.
Let's start with James Acaster, from a big role in the new Ghostbusters to this? I mean everything here was unprofessional and weak, if it'd have been a free tv movie on Dave you'd maybe like it more but at nearly £20 a ticket this is disgusting, it shouldn't have got to the screens, luckily I pay subscription.
The script wasn't funny, seemed to want to mimic horrible histories and ghosts kinda sense of humour but nothing landed, the acting was just weak but the script didn't help, there was more groans in the screening I was at. A few chuckles but not enough to excuse paying for this garbage.
This cast could've put together a great movie even with this idea, I'm amazed having nick frost in here, that you'd not get his advice or opinion!
The world was ok, costumes were garbage, endless unnecessary swearing, alot of stuff that didn't fit with time line, just a real mess.
Please don't waste your money on this, free stream or tv then fine but honestly you'll regret wasting a penny on this.
I thought it was a very entertaining, cute, rough-around -the edges- crude but witty film.
EXACTLY what I expected, as it was Advertised as such!
I believe those who reviewed went in total ly dark to the type of story this was going to be... as for me, I have been waiting for Seize Them! For over a year! I knew it would be silly and crass and predictable, but I knew full well it would be vague, low budget, satirical and offer just enough laughs and smirks to keep me entertained. It's brilliant cast did exactly as they were expected to withut missing a beat, never straying from the expectation of the characters they were playing.
These low scores are disheartening, as it's clear nobody who watched and commented had ANY idea what type of film this would be. I wished for a Little more creativity myself, I admit, but I really did enjoy it and took it exactly for what it was.
Give it a chance if you need something unrelatable, historically suspicious (and not correct) with a VERY talented cast and laughd along the way (i admit, more chuckles and subtlety in the humour department as it's not laugh out loud jokes)
Good on them for making it.
It took me away, amused, for 90 minutes I don't regret. Watch it when you feel you need some levity as long as blood is not an issue for you (I find calling it GORYa bit extreme tbh) it's a comedy, lie back with your partner, appreciate the swearing (instead of counting how much they swear )and enjoy with lightheartedness the silly story to move you along for 91 minutes taking you away from the gut-wrenching reliaty-based and often depressing movies of our time as we live in a difficult period right now.
Give it a chance. You can always walk away. To me, it was exactly what I knew it would be, so i let myself get caught up and enjoyed it instesd of focus on the shortcomings. We need to laugh these days, and this was a deserving film as absurd and not deep as one might hope that gave me just that.. a break from the news with simplicity and a simple but interesting story.
EXACTLY what I expected, as it was Advertised as such!
I believe those who reviewed went in total ly dark to the type of story this was going to be... as for me, I have been waiting for Seize Them! For over a year! I knew it would be silly and crass and predictable, but I knew full well it would be vague, low budget, satirical and offer just enough laughs and smirks to keep me entertained. It's brilliant cast did exactly as they were expected to withut missing a beat, never straying from the expectation of the characters they were playing.
These low scores are disheartening, as it's clear nobody who watched and commented had ANY idea what type of film this would be. I wished for a Little more creativity myself, I admit, but I really did enjoy it and took it exactly for what it was.
Give it a chance if you need something unrelatable, historically suspicious (and not correct) with a VERY talented cast and laughd along the way (i admit, more chuckles and subtlety in the humour department as it's not laugh out loud jokes)
Good on them for making it.
It took me away, amused, for 90 minutes I don't regret. Watch it when you feel you need some levity as long as blood is not an issue for you (I find calling it GORYa bit extreme tbh) it's a comedy, lie back with your partner, appreciate the swearing (instead of counting how much they swear )and enjoy with lightheartedness the silly story to move you along for 91 minutes taking you away from the gut-wrenching reliaty-based and often depressing movies of our time as we live in a difficult period right now.
Give it a chance. You can always walk away. To me, it was exactly what I knew it would be, so i let myself get caught up and enjoyed it instesd of focus on the shortcomings. We need to laugh these days, and this was a deserving film as absurd and not deep as one might hope that gave me just that.. a break from the news with simplicity and a simple but interesting story.
Take it for what it is.
It's silly, it has some funny jokes, it evolves at good pace, the story-line is only slightly bonkers, ...
You can see the budget was not big. But it doesn't need it.
It's well crafted and it keeps you entertained the whole time.
It doesn't drag, and you get a funny joke now and then. Only one or two laugh out loud ones, but plenty chuckles.
That's the kind of movie it is.
No idea why some people seem focused on trying to compare every movie to Citizen Kane.
They don't seem to understand that different movies have different purposes, and they all can be good as long as they fulfil their purpose.
You don't know what to watch, you want something light and entertaining. You are quite happy to watch three adorable actors for a while.
This is it.
This one will work for you.
It's silly, it has some funny jokes, it evolves at good pace, the story-line is only slightly bonkers, ...
You can see the budget was not big. But it doesn't need it.
It's well crafted and it keeps you entertained the whole time.
It doesn't drag, and you get a funny joke now and then. Only one or two laugh out loud ones, but plenty chuckles.
That's the kind of movie it is.
No idea why some people seem focused on trying to compare every movie to Citizen Kane.
They don't seem to understand that different movies have different purposes, and they all can be good as long as they fulfil their purpose.
You don't know what to watch, you want something light and entertaining. You are quite happy to watch three adorable actors for a while.
This is it.
This one will work for you.
Did you know
- SoundtracksThe Queen's Treble
written by John Johnson
performed by Princes in the Tower
- How long is Seize Them!?Powered by Alexa
Details
Box office
- Gross worldwide
- $324,493
- Runtime1 hour 31 minutes
- Color
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