The VelociPastor (2018)

After losing his parents, a priest travels to China, where he inherits a mysterious ability that allows him to turn into a dinosaur. At first horrified by this new power, a hooker convinces him to use it to fight crime. And ninjas.

Director:

Brendan Steere

Writer:

Brendan Steere

Stars:

Alyssa Kempinski, Greg Cohan, Aurelio Voltaire

1 win & 2 nominations.

Cast

Credited cast:
Alyssa Kempinski	...	Carol
Greg Cohan	...	Doug Jones (as Gregory James Cohan)
Aurelio Voltaire	...	Altair
Claire Hsu	...	Chinese Villager
Daniel Steere	...	Father Stewart
Fernando Pacheco De Castro	...	Frankie Mermaid
Jesse Turits	...	Sam the White Ninja
Nicholas M. Garofolo	...	Hobo
Zachary Steere	...	Dinosaur Suit Performer
David Sokol	...	Ali
Jiechang Yang	...	Wei Chan
Douglas Saint James	...	Surgeon
George Schewnzer	...	Doug's Dad
Alec Lambert	...	Thug
Erik Oh	...	Choi-Min

Storyline

After losing his parents, a priest travels to China, where he inherits a mysterious ability that allows him to turn into a dinosaur. At first horrified by this new power, a hooker convinces him to use it to fight crime. And ninjas.

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Plot Keywords:

driving montage | vietnam flashback | foot shot | flashback to entire movie | eyepatch over glasses | 

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Taglines:

How long has it been since your last confession?

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Genres:

Action | Adventure | Comedy | Fantasy | Horror | Sci-Fi | Thriller

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Details

Country:

USA China

Language:

English Cantonese Mandarin Korean

Release Date:

13 August 2019 (USA)

Also Known As:

The VelociPastor

Filming Locations:

Manhattan, New York City, New York, USA

Company Credits

Production Co:

Cyfuno Ventures, Hollow Tree Films, Laika Come Home

Technical Specs

Runtime:

75 min

Color:

Color

Did You Know?

Trivia

After filming and before developing, the film was put in an oven and baked at 200 degrees Fahrenheit for ten minutes to achieve the aged, old look.

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Quotes

Doug Jones: You're a hooker?
Carol: And premed/law, but people aren't surprised as much by that one.

User Reviews

My Review Of "Velocipastor"

I fully expected to go into this movie finding it too ridiculous to review seriously. And yeah, in a way I was right. "Velocipastor" is ridiculous, it can't be taken seriously but I enjoyed every minute of it. It becomes clear very early that this movie means to be over-the-top. Much like classic horror comedies in the past, "Full Moon High", and "Pandemonium", this film knows it is absurd comedy and total cheese.

Brendan Steere understands perfectly well the type of film he is making, and he was smart enough to gather a cast and crew who were in on the joke too. Some of the acting obviously falls short and it is a tightrope walk getting this story from scene one to the end without total collapse. Still, somehow, everything holds together with fun, entertaining craziness. And genuine laughs.

The effects are a blend of cheap CGI and low tech practical effects that fit inbetween gaming graphics and Adult Swim stuff. It would have been cool if more focus on creating a darker raptor had been taken, but still, it is a movie about a young priest turning into a dinosaur so the puppet/costume seems fitting. I have to add that "Velocipastor" has a cool soundtrack. And the whole music video montage in the center was entertaining as heck!

Overall this isn't gonna be everyone's take on "Velocipastor". And I get it, a lot of people can only get into spoof horror if it has a big budget to sell the jokes. I enjoyed this film. It is silly, over-the-top, and entertaining. It doesn't take itself serious but everyone involved were serious about creating this tongue-in-cheek bit of satire.