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If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

  • 2025
  • R
  • 1h 53m
IMDb RATING
7.2/10
257
YOUR RATING
POPULARITY
4,880
1,058
Rose Byrne in If I Had Legs I'd Kick You (2025)
Dark ComedyPsychological DramaComedyDrama

With her life literally crashing down around her, Linda attempts to navigate her child's mysterious illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and an increasingly hostile relationship wi... Read allWith her life literally crashing down around her, Linda attempts to navigate her child's mysterious illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and an increasingly hostile relationship with her therapist.With her life literally crashing down around her, Linda attempts to navigate her child's mysterious illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and an increasingly hostile relationship with her therapist.

  • Director
    • Mary Bronstein
  • Writer
    • Mary Bronstein
  • Stars
    • Rose Byrne
    • Conan O'Brien
    • Danielle Macdonald
  • See production info at IMDbPro
  • IMDb RATING
    7.2/10
    257
    YOUR RATING
    POPULARITY
    4,880
    1,058
    • Director
      • Mary Bronstein
    • Writer
      • Mary Bronstein
    • Stars
      • Rose Byrne
      • Conan O'Brien
      • Danielle Macdonald
    • 3User reviews
    • 31Critic reviews
    • 82Metascore
  • See production info at IMDbPro
  • See production info at IMDbPro
    • Awards
      • 1 win & 1 nomination total

    Photos8

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    Top cast24

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    Rose Byrne
    Rose Byrne
    • Linda
    Conan O'Brien
    Conan O'Brien
    • Therapist
    Danielle Macdonald
    Danielle Macdonald
    • Caroline
    Delaney Quinn
    Delaney Quinn
    • Child
    Mary Bronstein
    Mary Bronstein
    • Dr. Spring
    A$AP Rocky
    A$AP Rocky
    • James
    Ivy Wolk
    • Diana
    Christian Slater
    Christian Slater
    • Charles
    Mark Stolzenberg
    Mark Stolzenberg
    • Parking Attendant
    Manu Narayan
    Manu Narayan
    • Landlord
    Ella Beatty
    Ella Beatty
    • Kate
    Eva Kornet
    Eva Kornet
    • Breathworker
    Helen Hong
    Helen Hong
    • Eva
    Daniel Zolghadri
    Daniel Zolghadri
    • Stephen
    Josh Pais
    Josh Pais
    • Brad
    Ronald Bronstein
    • Caroline's Husband
    Laurence Blum
    Laurence Blum
    • Police Officer
    Lark White
    Lark White
    • Vanessa
    • Director
      • Mary Bronstein
    • Writer
      • Mary Bronstein
    • All cast & crew
    • Production, box office & more at IMDbPro

    User reviews3

    7.2257
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    10

    Featured reviews

    9Steve_Ramsey

    Chaotic and challenging

    If I Had Legs I'd Kick You feels like it could be the breakaway hit of Sundance 2025. As with many of the films at the festival, I sat in on a press screening not knowing much about the movie beyond the brief blurb in the program. I chatted with the person seated next to me about the films we had seen and how we had both heard some good buzz about this film. The lights dimmed, and the first thing that appeared on the screen was the A24 logo. We immediately turned to each other, and expressed a mutual "Ahh!". Sure, they're behind a few clunkers, but in general, when I see that A24 is behind a project, I perk up. Their films are just plain different.

    Writer and Director Mary Bronstein has presented a challenging portrayal of motherhood that is uncomfortable to watch. Shot almost entirely in close-ups, the atmosphere is claustrophobic, frenetic, and oppressive, with no lingering establishing shots to allow the viewer to orient themselves. We are forced into Linda's personal space, feeling almost like we're invading her privacy: the camera is focused on Linda in almost every shot. If I Had Legs I'd Kick You is about challenging the audience to confront truths about motherhood, guilt, and the emotional divide between cultural expectations and personal reality. Imagine Nightbitch, but without the quirkiness.

    The plot centers around Linda (Rose Byrne), a psychotherapist trying to balance her job with her 10 year old, nameless daughter who suffers from some sort of unnamed illness that demands she receive constant care and attention. The daughter is faceless throughout the film and connected to a feeding tube, the umbilical cord that Linda desperately wants to sever. The focus here isn't on the illness itself, but on Linda's emotional and physical exhaustion, and her growing resentment. Similar to the disturbing We Need to Talk About Kevin (2011), the film explores the taboo subject of a mom who has never bonded with her child. Here, Linda is self-medicating with drugs and alcohol and making other questionable choices, all the while trying to counsel other people.

    If I Had Legs I'd Kick You is a film of metaphors and layers of emotional nuance. Early in the movie, Linda experiences a flood in her apartment that leaves a huge hole in the ceiling, forcing her to move into a cheap motel nearby. Despite her efforts to coordinate repairs, the hole simply isn't getting fixed. A recurring theme is Linda needing help and not getting any, and this huge hole in her life is just getting bigger. She keeps returning to the apartment, only to discover that no work has been done on the hole.

    The movie also explores the theme of being "seen". Linda's interactions with others, including her therapist (a chillingly detached Conan O'Brien), reflect her frustration with being unable to find the support she needs, despite her constant pleas for help. Her husband is a ship's captain, off at sea, and offers no support. He can't understand why Linda isn't getting the ceiling fixed. The most grounded character in the film is her motel neighbor James (A$AP Rocky) who literally calls her out for being a neglectful mom. I guess he's the only person who does actually "see" her in the way we, as an audience do. James's confrontations with Linda are in stark contrast to the others who largely ignore or misunderstand her struggles.

    It's difficult to convey the chaotic energy in this movie and the sense of being out of control. What if you don't feel the love towards your own offspring the way you are expected to? If I Had Legs I'd Kick You is a film that tackles motherhood head on and offers no easy conclusions. It's an exhausting experience and I loved it. It's only January, but I'm sure this will be in my top ten list in December.
    8constheo

    A must see, spine-chilling dive into madness

    An outstanding film-in fact, the best I saw at this year's Berlinale. Watching it, I couldn't help but feel echoes of The Substance (2024), as it masterfully balances fantasy, horror, and an almost suffocating intensity centred around the theme of motherhood.

    *** Rose Byrne delivers a phenomenal performance, one that earned her a well-deserved award in Berlin. The film leans heavily on her presence, and rightly so-her portrayal is what makes the experience so gripping. We see, hear, and feel everything from her perspective, yet that very subjectivity leaves room for doubt. Are we witnessing reality or a distorted, anxiety-fuelled version of it?

    *** The cinematography amplifies this tension brilliantly. The use of tight close-ups throughout most of the film creates an unsettling sense of imprisonment, mirroring the protagonist's internal struggle. It's only in some moments of relief that the camera pulls back, giving us fleeting glimpses of the world beyond her immediate perception. This directorial choice not only strengthens the script but also deepens the film's psychological impact.

    *** If I Had Legs, I Would Kick You is an immersive, nerve-wracking experience-a must-see that will undoubtedly find its place on many cinephiles lists for the 2025 best movies.

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    Storyline

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    Did you know

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    • Trivia
      Stars Conan O'Brien in his first serious acting role in a movie.
    • Connections
      Referenced in Radio Dolin: The Results of Oscar-2025 with Anton Dolin (2025)

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    FAQ15

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    Details

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    • Release date
      • January 24, 2025 (United States)
    • Country of origin
      • United States
    • Language
      • English
    • Also known as
      • Если бы у меня были ноги, я бы тебя пнула
    • Filming locations
      • Montauk, New York, USA
    • Production companies
      • A24
      • Bronxburgh
      • Elara Pictures
    • See more company credits at IMDbPro

    Tech specs

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    • Runtime
      1 hour 53 minutes
    • Color
      • Color
    • Sound mix
      • Dolby Digital

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