Almighty Thor (TV Movie 2011) Poster

(2011 TV Movie)

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Wow - IMDb should have a -10 out of 10 rating... Bad Bad Bad
maxx222-49-6549509 May 2011
I'm sorry this movie was horrible. From the beginning with the weird cgi of the huge army in battle, but any scenes with the soldiers only showed one or two fighting... Most of the time swinging their swords up in the air to the off camera demon dogs (or whatever)... To the constant walking of Loki once he got to Earth...what was that a total of 10+ minutes of him just strolling on the sidewalk and attempting to look menacing? The movie was so bad i got distracted by Thor's brother's weird Rocky looking lip... and Thor's bright white two front teeth? Are those bad caps or did he suck his thumb too long... Thor whined more than Luke Skywalker in the first Star Wars... I gave up with only 15 minutes left of the movie. Thor even had some "magical" earth jacket that would hide the hammer when he put it in his inside pocket...sometimes it went in handle first some times hammer end first...(Didn't Dungeons and Dragon's have some endless pocket or something like that?) Oh the "magical" jacket even had a place to hold his sword on his back and remained invisible until he pulled it out... :)

Btw, I actually registered on IMDb so i could post this review...That's how bad the movie was...
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Is this the worst film I have ever seen??
The simple answer is quite possibly yes.

The joke is though that this film is so bad that you can't even laugh at it.

I found myself cringing at the appalling dialogue. The CGI was very poorly done and the camera work in general was very dodgy to say the least with lots of shaking.

The "acting" (if you can call it that) was appalling. Whether or not this is due to the poor directing or that they are actually that bad (which I fail to believe) is unforgivable, and some might even say criminal. As someone who has done some acting, if I was in this steaming heap, I would want my name removed from the credits.

This is defiantly one to avoid if you value your time. It is 1 hour and 30 minutes I will never get back.

Even Alan Smithee wouldn't want to put his name to this.
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The Mighty Awful Thor!
grouchoM8 May 2011
This movie was just hilariously awful. It seems like a 12 year old wrote the script. It tells the story of a young Thor coming of age and trying to avenge his father Odin (played by professional rassler Kevin Nash), who was smited by Loki (Richard Grieco). Seems Loki the evil trickster wants the famous hammer that would eventually become Thor's bread and butter weapon. Grieco walks around with evil written all over him including a powdery white face and black spikey armor.

Cody Deal is the dumbest Thor or for that matter any other super hero/god ever. He can't fight and even though Jarnsaxa (a warrior chick trained by The Valkyries played by Patricia Velasquez) tells him over and over that he can't fight, has no skills and can't beat Loki he just continually ignores her and says "I'm going to find Loki and kill him". Guess what?! Every time he finds Loki he gets his butt whipped handily. Still our thickheaded moron of a hero won't go train and says "I am going to find Loki and kill him!" This movie is beyond bad. I watched it on the Sci/Fi channel and it has all the makings of a Sci/Fi original film. The CGI is cheap and cartoony. The fights are shot like they shot one move, cut, then another move, cut and then another. BUT I will say this, if you like bad movies and like to laugh at how horrible and ridiculous they are then you will get something out of this. I laughed and was held to the screen by its awfulness!
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Well, Marvel's got nothing to worry about...
cpeter1338 May 2011
I caught this on Syfy, and I wish I could make them take it back. The plot centered around Loki trying to destroy the earth by killing Yggdrasill, the tree of life. I don't remember if either Thor or Loki mention it by name; I got the impression they couldn't pronounce actual Nordic terms if their paychecks depended on it. Not only this, but Loki keeps talking about Ragnarok, and it is obvious the writers had no idea what the term means. They would probably also call people in a blimp "the Rapture." Anywhoo, the whole plot requires Loki to steal Thor's hammer. Why this is difficult is never made clear, because Thor is a major beefcake meathead. He sounds like a surfer and spends most of the movie looking like he needs a diaper change. Some woman named Jarnsaxa spoon-feeds him every move, which is amazing because she is practically unintelligible--a fact made even more painful when they do vocal effects and her words could not be deciphered even by CIA software.

I won't spoil the ending, because the director and writer already did that. Suffice it to say that it involves a trip to Hell; not HEL, the Nordic afterlife and the goddess thereof, but basically the Christian Hell--fire, lava, the whole ball of melting wax.

Watch this if you need a good laugh; there isn't an ounce of real heroism or grandeur in the whole mess. My biggest disappointment was Richard Grieco, who can be an effective menace but here comes across as a street punk with a wand and a skin condition.
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Very poor acting, graphics and casting. Movie appeared to have been made in the 80s.
lancaster10378 May 2011
I have been a Thor fan since the first editions came out when I was a boy. This movie was a horrible adaptation of a great legend. The casting was terrible, the acting bad and the graphics seemed twenty years old. I understand low budget films made for cable, but I could not watch this one. Thor came across as a geek (not misspelled) god instead of the true power he should be. The hammer looked as if were made out of whatever could be found in the back yard. The female lead showed no real athleticism and the fight scenes were poorly choreographed. The movie may have gotten better as it progressed, but after 45 minutes I had to give up on it. All in all, a very disappointing movie that had great possibilities.
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Burn before viewing
jcoulomb2 August 2011
One of the worst movies I've ever seen, bar absolutely none. Special effects look like special defects, acting is so bad (except for Loki-nothing outstanding, but he looks like a genius compared to the others), it's to cry for, the plot is so simplistic it's almost scary, the dialogs are way beyond cliché, and most of the movie looks like it was filmed in a back lot. And yes, there is a dark and stormy knight.

The movie is so bad I found myself rooting for Loki, hoping he would kill Thor as soon as possible, so that the movie would finally end. But no such luck. It kept going on, and on, and on, and... I almost wish I could have knocked myself out with the hammer of invincibility.

There's 90 minutes of my life that I'll never get back.
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On the first day, Ray created Thor.
thedeekon8 May 2011
Warning: Spoilers
There are no words to describe this movie. I could sit hear and hammer out superlatives and hyperboles all night and not do it justice. I won't attempt to qualify it. Suffice it to say that this movie makes SyFy's previous Thor flick, starring Zachery Ty Brian, look like the real deal.

The grace of this movie's transitions has not been seen since Wiseau's The Room. Nothing in this movie makes sense. We careen from one hysterical scene to the next.

"There's not enough time; we have to kill Loki now!" says Thor (which constantly appears to owe people a Big Time bar). He's time traveled to the future; he doesn't even know what year it is. How the heck does he know this is the exact second in which he must confront Loki? I know; he's a God -- anyone who can cut yarn with a square-faced hammer must be!

If you wanna see kindergarten-level effects, fun-house plot flow, and Tony Award Winning film acting, then this is the movie for you. - P.S. Watch for Odin's Ace-brand Knee Brace.
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Crackers and cheese, the soft, smelly kind
chsuth7 May 2011
I have read other reviews of this film, and think they are being generous to talk about this film as having five characters, because I saw some people wandering around on the screen, sometimes in slo-mo, other times in no-mo, but there wasn't much character there. Cody Deal, who is he, by the way?, has the body for Thor; too bad they kept it covered up most of the time with a Wal-Mart quality costume. He doesn't have the voice for this kind of hero, however, and I kept waiting for him to just stop talking.

Richard Grieco has acting skills, which unfortunately he left back in the 1980s and neglected to bring along to this film. The rest can go without mention.

As for the plot, well, it is hard to talk about plot here. Thor is supposed to save the world by defeating the evil devil-god Loki in the back alleys of Los Angeles, and every other low-budget location that could be had for a hundred bucks and some coffee-shop coupons. Round this out with computer animations and enhancements straight off of my old Commodore 64 computer, and you get a major horror film, but perhaps not the kind of horror really intended. Someone was channeling Ed Wood here for sure. We just needed burning paper plates doubling as UFOs to complete the effect, and hey, there's an idea for a sequel! Syfy and Asylum were looking to cash in on the bigger Thor picture in theaters now (apparently this Thor auditioned for that role, too; in what universe was that going to happen?) but apparently Brannagh's Thor isn't hammering the crowds, either, in real blockbuster fashion.

Well, I guess this is the season for Worse rather than Norse.
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WOW, in a bad bad baaaaad way.
kuluvas8 May 2011
It's almost like whoever wrote this doesn't know anything about Thor.

With Scifi(I refuse to type the other)pouring money in to garbage like this and canceling great shows they have destroyed the network and it started with wrestling, I don't see ever watching the channel again after the SGU finale.

I can't even watch more than 15 min of it and that was painful beyond words, then I thought it to be unfair to say the things like this without at least finishing it so i suffered... So if you want to feel like digging your eyes out with a spoon watch this. Character names were the only thing that had to do with Thor I really wish I could give it negative stars but 1 will have to do.
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What a piece of garbage
Darthoej12 May 2011
Warning: Spoilers
I want it to be known that when it comes to movies, it doesn't take much to win me over. I can count on my hands how many absolutely terrible movies that I have seen. Thanks to the Asylum and this piece of crap that list is growing. It really shows me that they have no respect for movie viewers or the art of film making.

I don't think I even have to list everything that I hated about Almighty Thor. From the shoddy acting, kindergarten-level special effects, and god awful was all bad. One thing that I do have to mention is the horrible inaccuracies of this film. For example, towards the beginning of the movie, Loki kills Odin by stabbing him in the upper back with about 2 inches of sword it looked like. Doesn't take much to kill the all-father it seems, plus Odin isn't supposed to die until his is killed at Ragarok by Fenrir. Speaking of Ragnarok, Loki can be seen walking through Los Angeles chanting it while citizens scurry about barely noticing him. Like I heard in another review, its like the people behind this have no clue about Norse mythology. I recently read an interview with Cody Deal(the actor who plays Thor in this movie), and it boils my blood that he tries to justify this abomination.

Yet another movie that I can do better with 500 bucks and a cell phone camera.
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Horrible. Movie is good for a laugh
Sissy280722 December 2014
Warning: Spoilers
I saw this on TV and figured I see how it compared to the other Thor movies (Marvels and the Zachary Ty Bryan one). It was absolutely terrible. I am surprised and shocked that Syfy made this film. It is as if the writer had no knowledge of Thor or Norse history.

The CGI effects are cartoony and laughable.

The fights are poorly choreographed and slow as if they are were filmed while the actors trained. And why on Earth does Thor get a pistol? Most of the times you can catch glimpses of the actors modern attire underneath costumes that looked as though they were made by a community theatre.

As for the actors, Thor (Cody) portrays Thor as a dimwitted nerd who lacks intelligence, strength, and coordination. His physique is nice but its difficult to see underneath the hideous cape and overcoat. As for Jarnsexca (Patricia), I didn't understand why she had powers or what exact position she had that allows her to travel through portals. She just does not possess a strong female heroine presence. And Loki (Richard) just seemed like a goth punk. Where were the tricks and comedy that he is known for? Odin (Kevin Nash) is an amazing fighter but for his scenes, you can clearly tell he had to slow down so Loki could match him.

The plot is well, really there is none. The movie just bounces from scene to scene. First we want to find the Hammer or hunt for some Tree or kill Loki. There really was no chronological order.

Do not spend your time watching this film. You are better off reading a book.
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A complete waste of precious time
doctorcd200522 June 2011
I rented this film thinking it was the Natalie Portman release, oh my gosh was I wrong.

Caught by Asylum yet again. The most appalling and cheapskate CGI I have ever see, inaccurate story and weak acting, my goodness, what is this production company really all about. The beast fighting where you see slashing at monsters which are off the screen to save CGI efforts are by example simply laughable.

Afraid i could not finish this one, I'd seriously recommend you do not waste your precious life's time even verifying the above. And be careful of your title, make sure it is not an Asylum production.
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One of the worst movies I have seen so far this year
TheLittleSongbird5 July 2011
I have made no secret of disliking The Asylum/SyFy's output, there is the odd exception where some films of theirs are tolerable but neither come close to very good/masterpiece status, most are bad and quite a lot bottom of the barrel quality. Almighty Thor belongs in the bottom of the barrel category, and I can only think of about 3 of their films that are worse than this(Titanic II, Alien vs. Hunter and The Apocalypse).

Absolutely nothing about Almighty Thor works. The production values are really quite poor. Haphazard editing, some really odd camera angles and some of the most crude CGI effects in any of The Asylum's films. The dialogue is laughable, although a lot of the film from The Asylum/SyFy have this problem the dialogue here really takes the biscuit. Not much effort is seemingly put into the story or characters here, the story is never secure in the pace-some scenes feel rushed(the ending) and others feel pedantic(the middle)- and is never interesting, while the characters are not developed or used well at all and nothing is done to make me engage with them. The acting all round is also appalling, Cody Deal is very uncharismatic and can't act his way out of a paper bag no matter how hard he tried.

Overall, not only one of the worst so far of the year and also one of the worst to come from The Asylum. 0/10 Bethany Cox
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Easily one of the worst films I've seen
wytsevenema11 January 2014
This damn film.. I have never seen people act so lifeless. The guy that plays Loki should get a damn razzy for his crapness. The story is ridiculous, and a third along the way they step over into the human world. With they I mean Thor, a pathetic excuse for a norse God (as are the other gods, especially Loki. Screw that guy). And some slack woman, a Valkyrie I don't remember the name of. I just love Syfy. It's laughingly bad. I just shake my head and laugh to myself these days.. I no longer get upset at bad quality TV by them, as it is pretty much what you expect anyway.

1/10 Absolutely laughably bad
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Napoleon Dynamite with a six pack
d-neleman5 October 2012
Warning: Spoilers
Well.. Almighty Thor... This is the most dumbest attempt of a super hero movie I've ever seen. It's a sad sad pile of horse pooh, but at least It's still -funny- bad. The general though that came up was Napoleon Dynamite on steroids vs. a goth with a serious skin infection. What was Richard Grieco thinking while shooting this? Sure, he's no A-lister but this must have been a painful experience. Everything is wrong here. Special Effects suck. The monsters, jet planes, everything looks like a pre-pre-render. When LA supposed to be in ashes, all I saw was apartment buildings with lame smoke rendering and no damage at all. Thor and Jax pinned on a building wall, from far away apparently should look like gingerbread men. And the fighting scenes are the dumbest ever.. Cody Deal can't even act enough to suppress the stupid grin on his face as he charges to hit Loki. This guy is bad-bad.

The final battle and death scene of Loki, sorry I spoiled it for you, is like looking at two 8 year kids playing on a street corner.

How lazy can you be to deliver something like this as a director or writer. Everybody with a little bit of understanding of the theme and a slight interest in the subject or films in general will make a better movie. Then why can't the 'creative team' of this mess? How do these people get money to produce this and why does SyFy invest in it, and subsequently air this and many other crap productions. These people should be out of a &^*&^* job! Producers and executive producers need to be held accountable as well.

The Troma movies, sincerely, are better movies than this.
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The gods must be dumb
paaskynen22 September 2012
Warning: Spoilers
I can forgive a lot in movie-making; a film may have severe flaws but if it is brought with enthusiasm and some creativity it can still win me over. This is not one of those films.

The glaring flaw of the Almighty Thor is the kindergarten level script. There is nothing almighty about Thor here, apart from him being almightily annoying. If it was Homer Simpson, his stupidity might have been funny, but in this pretense-mythical flick it is merely irritating.

Unfortunately, the flick does not have any redeeming qualities to make up for the lack of any story line. The props and costumes look like what you would expect in a hayseed community theatre, the sfx are at a level that was impressive sixty years ago, the acting is cardboard and the score nondescript. Still, Blubberella is worse.
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"The hammer is not yours to take."
lost-in-limbo19 November 2011
Wow… almighty I think not. I saw the ads playing on TV and it actually looked like it might be some harmless, no-brainer fun. Terrible, but fun. Well it was a no-brainer. As this limited made-for-TV Scy-fy feature (from The Global Asylum productions) was a lousy superhero knock-off with little in way of entertainment and even unintentional laughs in this role-playing venture. It reminded me of those Hercules / Xena TV episodes, but they were better. Other than Cody Deal's humorously awkward delivery of his lines and overall whiny attitude as Thor, this mockery was rather drab and repetitive. How many times do I have to watch Richard Grieco as the demonic god Loki wandering around the woods and streets. At least with that wandering, he did look badass in his get-up while also frowning a lot but at least there was a purpose for that constant wandering… in search of Odin's Hammer of Invincibility. So there's a lot of walking (bad guys), then running (good guys) and but also yelling. I don't know why… but yelling seems like the only way to get something across. Especially Thor. Constant arguments with Patricia Velasquez'z helpful character. But even when danger is around (dogs of hell and the CGI) or there's a chance to finish things off, people decide to stand around explaining things that just don't need explaining. Maybe it's because Thor is just so stupid, you just wish Locki would finish the job… "…Not quite!". When it comes to the jerky action, for most part it's done in awesome slow-motion to simply enhance the epic, if lumbering fight choreography. It's no effect, they are virtually fighting in slow motion. One move after another. While watch round after round as Thor gets beaten up by Locki. Every encounter is basically the same and Thor is too dumb to realise training would help. But no he must kill Loki… NOW! Quite awe-inspiring, just like the powerful dialogues with a message at heart. However where is else to you get to see Thor toting a machine gun… yep a machine gun… against a god… and he did have the hammer at his use. It figures, as its lack of imagination shows. Also showing up in a small part is Kevin Nash as Odin.

"I don't believe in fate."
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Insomniacs R us
Cerysdad12 August 2011
Lacking in any merit whatsoever, even as a spoof.

This is my only review so far and considering how much of a couch potato I am at the moment, it's a measure of how truly awful this film was that I've made this effort. I thought that I could laugh at/with almost anything. This film is so far from my almost universal sense of humour and tolerance for low standards that you'd need a telescope to see it ... utterly dreadful. I didn't even realise that it was a spoof until googling it a few minutes ago and even then can't believe that the critic found it in any way creditable at all.

It only needs to have a passing acquaintance with the source material so I really don't have a problem with that. I can also accept relatively poor acting. Even if this was negligently acted on purpose, it was indeed poorly executed. In fact, I initially thought that this was a poorly dubbed foreign film.

It didn't flow, was poorly edited, and had special effects that the original series of Dr. Who would have been ashamed of. OK, that's an exaggeration, but considering current levels of technology this film's makers have proved far less able to utilise the technology available.

The script/dialogue had me doing so many cartoon double takes that I felt like my neck would snap. I'm not going to dignify the film by providing a plot line ... I wouldn't want my synopsis to accidentally entice someone to watch the film.

I can honestly say that I only continued watching because I couldn't believe it to be so inept. I fell asleep at one point and had to reverse in order not to miss any of the fatigue inducing experience at all ... I want to be able to say that I managed to watch all of it.

This is probably not the worst film ever made, but it's certainly the worst I've ever watched. Feel free to try it out but it's not worth your time and I certainly hope no-one paid any money to watch it. Even as a spoof, it's a complete waste of minutes of your life. I need a shower now just to wash the experience away. I'd seek memory loss but then I'd run the risk of accidentally watching it again.
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Thor. Supposedly
douginlondon22 June 2011
Almighty Thor. The names are the same but everything else has apparently been changed to protect other talented productions regarding anything having to do with the Thunder God.

DISCLAIMER: This review is under the label IMHO (In My Humble Opinion)! This production even makes The episode of the Hulk (meets Thor) look good! Save your time. Save you frustration.This show was like very bad sci-fi television. It is hard to believe it is so bad considering the took a whole 12 DAYS to shoot it!!! (Heavy on the sarcasm)

Sorry, but it was poorly edited - long dragged out scenes short have been cut tighter. The acting, to me was unconvincing. The final impression was that the movie was misconceived. To much irrelevant "action". Too many long winded speeches. I was excited to see the hot chick from The Mummy (Patricia Velasquez) but her performance was dragged down my other cast (*ahem* Cody Deal)and terrible script and poor direction. One reason I say terrible is because it really failed to hold my attention at all. It truly came across as a rushed botched effort. But I may not know of what I speak, so if you have the time to waste, be my guest.
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You have to muster all your strength for this one...
paul_haakonsen11 November 2012
First of all I have to mention two things. First of all, I am part Danish and part Norwegian so the Norse mythology is in my heritage and in my blood. Secondly, I can't claim to be overly much fan of the Marvel "Thor" movie neither.

But this SyFy Channel attempt to swing at the Norse mythology was just painful and offensive. Given it being a SyFy Channel production gives it a certain degree of leniency, because they usually put out some rather questionable movies. Though it should be said that once in a rare while they do hit a home-run and put out something worthwhile. However, "Almighty Thor" was definitely a swing and a miss of the worst kind.

As with most SyFy Channel productions the CGI is questionable or downright laughable. And they didn't fail on that aspect in "Almighty Thor". The CGI animated creatures were such an eyesore and the special effects, with ironic emphasis on special, were nothing to write home about.

I could understand the poor attempt at a storyline here, despite the obvious holes and mistakes, but their choice in who were on the cast list. Wow! That just simply puzzles me beyond comprehension. I am sure that Cody Deal (playing Thor) is good at whatever he has made prior to and after "Almighty Thor" (though I can't claim to have seen him before or since), but as the god of thunder, he was just not the best of choices. I couldn't take him seriously in the role; it was like watching a buffed version of Napoleon Dynamite (Jon Heder) just with a better haircut. And as for Richard Grieco (playing Loki), what was up with that make-up? He looked like he was a methamfetamine addict, and it was difficult to take him serious in the role as well. Then to further upset the scale, enter Patricia Velasquez (playing Jarnsaxa) with that heavy Latin accent, it just didn't fit into the movie at all.

Now, "Almighty Thor" isn't all bad. Believe it or not, there was some upsides to the movie. And that was the costumes. I enjoyed the armor and costumes that they used in the movie. Lots of nice details there.

In overall, watching "Almighty Thor" was like watching a group of people running around acting out a LARP (Live Action Role Playing) event. It was just dreadful, and a major slap in the face to anyone who respects or pays tribute to the Norse pantheon.

Come to think of it, I think they actually got the title wrong, I think it was meant to be titled "Almighty Bore" and not "Almighty Thor". Sure seemed that way from the lack of energy and entertainment value to this production.

I've seen a heap of SyFy Channel productions over the years, and this was definitely amongst the top of the chain as in terms of being bad!
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adam-p-f-ward21 October 2011
Warning: Spoilers
A major blockbuster based on the Marvel Comic entitled Thor is released and someone had one clever idea...Marvel do not own the rights to the ancient Norse myth and therefore could not prevent this apparently rushed cash in.

Unfortuently the film is empty of any decent ideas. In Asgard the characters talk modern American with no attempt to signify that this is a different world. The fight scenes are awful. At no point is it established what Loki (the antagonist of the film) wants or why other than he wants a hammer.

Thor is a weak useless character and his father and brother do not let him fight, but he does, he falls over, disappears and then reappears and wakes up to find his brother and father dead. Then he is saved from Loki by a woman and they run away.

The remainder of the plot, if there is one, is they run away from loki, then go to fight him, runaway, go back, runaway, and no character looks likes they actually have a reason for doing anything. They get to Earth and walk around a small industrial estate, and have no interaction with any earthlings which wastes a potential (albeit clichéd) story telling option. I wont ruin the end, because there isn't one worth watching.

My favourite bit is when Loki somehow makes some CGI creatures appear and one woman runs from behind him screaming towards the camera and then off screen, a second later two men come running from the opposite direction into short and passed loki. There is no obvious sign of danger in view, so was the woman running towards her doom? My second fav bit is after Thor has saved the day, he suddenly surrounded by humans who apparently just want to stare at him.

Some people have complained about the CGI, I didn't think it was that bad, obviously nowhere near top movie standards but if the film was well written and well acted the audience could suspend their disbelief and accept the cgi.
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Wow this is bad
psgusa7 May 2011
Warning: Spoilers
When I first saw this movie was going to be on ScFy, I thought it is was going to cool. That was a mistake, the plot was kinda of stupid, Kevin Nash as Odin was not good, Richard Grieco as Loki and Cody Deal as Thor were decent, and Patricia Velasquez as Jarnsaxa was bad, why would they get a actress with an accent to play an Asgardian. Basically Loki come to Asgard to take over and get the hammer of life. Odin believe Thor isn't ready to fight and then Loki kill both Odin and Thor's older brother, which makes Thor vow vengeance. Before dying, Odin send the hammer to Earth and Thor gone after the hammer with the help of Jarnsaxa. After that I give up the movie.
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Don't really waste your time.
rrd23419 June 2012
I made an account just to say how awful this movie is. Kevin Nash wasted his time on this movie. The actors all looked terrible and did not fit the characters they attempted to portray. Whoever made this movie should be quite embarrassed. It makes me ask the question, what was the budget? Seems like a VERY small one. Even for the type of movie it is, it was bad. My opinion of it was very low before I even started watching it, but WOW! It surprised me, that's how bad it was to be honest. Even the CGI disappointed me, and I gave up watching as soon as I realised that the 10 minutes they were using to make Loki look scary... completely failed. (1/10)/10.
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Worst film ever
matthew-302-81738426 February 2012
Hard to believe this ever saw commercial release. I have seen better films from school projects. The CGI was pretty poor, but that would be forgivable if the story and acting were even passable. The writing was so poor I was putting words in the actors mouths and there were dozens of moments when a simple one-liner would have given the moment a bit of humour or irony. Instead the actors often gazed blankly at the camera with some sort of expression that looked like they were trying to convey some deep emotion, unfortunately it usually looked like they were trying to remember their lines or had some kind of stomach ailment. Possibly not entirely the actors fault, the script and directing were awful and the editing could be largely to blame as it looked like out-takes were left in to pad out the film. Definitely one of the worst films I have ever seen.
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Ahahaha... no.
zereshk17 January 2012
Warning: Spoilers
If you haven't seen the film and wonder whether you will like it, look at it this way: the only reason this movie was made was because people might confuse the DVD for that of the Marvel film "Thor" which came out at the same time, and buy it *accidently*.

That is really all you need to know about this film.

Since I need to fill 10 lines however... well... this is possibly the worst film I have ever seen. I won't even comment on the costumes and CGI since it's obviously a low-budget film. But you don't need a lot of money to create a halfway decent story or get the mythology even remotely right. "Thor" takes a lot of liberties when it comes to this but at least in that film dead people don't go to Muspelheim (or, as the characters in this "film" pronounce it: Muscle-M) simply because it's hot there. And the Norns talk like American high school girls ("Loki will like totally destroy the world and stuff! I know, right? So messed up!"). Thor makes the same mistakes over and over again and, after millenia of being a hammer-wielding god, has to be taught to fight by a young mortal woman no older than 30. Loki spends most of his screen time wandering the streets in silence, apparently telling himself jokes in his thoughts. And the legendary hammer itself - which in the actual saga was forged by a dwarven master blacksmith - consists of a stone that is bound to a piece of wood with leather straps.

A villain without any kind of back story, a hero too dumb to tell his mouth from his rear end without assistance and a black street thug to fill the diversity requirement. What more could you ask for. Watch this film if you know a thing or two about Norse mythology and want to spend 90 minutes with a like-minded friend laughing and pointing fingers.
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