G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013) Poster

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3/10
Disappointing.
zmlatoza29 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
It sucks that they had to put up a poster of this movie with Duke (Channing Tatum) and Joe (Bruce Willis) so grossly misleading when Duke showed up about what 10 mins or so then dies and Joe shows up when half of the movie is already finished, and not getting much burn at that (I should have known, how many of Willis's recent movies has been like this already). For an average movie goer like me (i'd like to think of myself like that) that doesn't normally go researching(goggling stuff) before watching a movie, I was sucked up by the poster itself expecting a whole lot of Duke and Joe in action. In my opinion, The Rock is not a bad actor himself but sadly he is not able to carry the movie by himself. I believe the movie producers/marketers or whoever is responsible for creating that misleading poster cheated people for their money. To be honest I am not sure I would be going to watch the movie in theater had I known I would be only getting this much, It's one of the movies I could have waited to be available on HBO\TV or on DVD. I did like the special effects though, especially the mountain action scenes.
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7/10
Plenty of great visuals and action but not much story.
jhpstrydom9 September 2013
This second G.I JOE film doesn't have much in terms of a well thought out plot but it does have some great visuals and is packed with loads of well staged action sequences so action movie buffs should have a blast. For those also seeking more of a character story it's still best to look somewhere else.

The acting is however surprisingly good given the film's plot. Dwayne Johnson and Channing Tatum both bring a certain likability to their characters and I enjoyed watching them the most and of course Adrianne Palicki who was very friendly on the eyes.

Overall, The film might not have much of a plot but the great visuals and the well made action sequences keep it from becoming a total bore. Those who want more of a character driven plot might not think very much of it.
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6/10
If you don't expect much, you might like it.
naregian30 March 2013
As a film buff, I love seeing films alone on Saturday afternoons or Friday nights. As as result of my frequent attendance, I have come to know not to expect much from action blockbuster films. Yes, you get your usual incomprehensible hand-to-hand fights, buildings exploding and enemy gunfire as inaccurate as ever, with the inevitably minimal plot and screenplay. As the ending credits rolled, I stood up thinking "ehhh". The film definitely had some amazingly entertaining action sequences and awesome special effects, but you know, you can't really be THAT amazed with an action film. Not gonna lie, the screenplay in this film was pretty well written, and it included quite a few pleasantly surprising laughs. Dwayne Johnson has a big few months ahead of him with the release of Snitch (which I give a 7/10), the next Fast and Furious movie, and Pain & Gain. With this film, he did reinforce his true acting credentials, even though not much notable acting is observed in such a genre. All in all, if you're expecting something like Olympus Has Fallen, you might be dissatisfied. If you go in like me, with no true expectations other than hoping for some entertainment, you might like what you see.
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G.I.Joe Retaliation:Strictly Average!
GaneshKSalian4 April 2013
G.I. Joe Retaliation is an strictly average action movie.

The movie has the same repeated story,which we have often seen in many action movies before.

For me,what made G.I Joe Retaliation more disappointing is Bruce Willis.He had hardly any screen-space to showcase his action skills.

G.I Joe Retaliation is a movie made for the teens.The teens are surely going to love this one! There are many action sequences in this movie,but only a few stand out.The action sequence in the Himalayas is the highlight of the movie.This action sequence has been shot very nicely.

The direction is mediocre.

Performance: Dwayne Johnson is fine.Channing Tatum is strictly okay.Elodie Yung,Ray Park and Adrianne Palicki are just okay.Bruce Willis disappoints.

All in all,G.I.Joe Retaliation is a strictly average action movie.I would recommend this flick for the teens but not for adults.I am giving it a four on ten.
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6/10
A bit of A Disappointment Storywise
alucard_castlevania8627 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I had 50/50 hopes for this movie and felt a bit bummed out when it was told that it will be delayed to March 2013 but I thought maybe it was for the best so I decided to give it chance. Now after nearly a year of waiting, I have to say I was a bit disappointed

First off, they promised to explain what happened to the characters in the previous film that didn't show up (ripcord, Scarlett etc.) but no explanation was given whatsoever as well as wanting to strengthen Duke and Baroness character but nothing was ever explained. 2nd storywise, it was not that very interesting in my opinion and there some parts which I find a bit illogic and not explained like how did Storm Shadow survive. The guy just like appeared out of no where

Character wise, Cobra rules compared to the Joes. Lady Jaye and Flint were not really that interesting to watch and the romance between them didn't really look that convincing. Killing off Duke Hauser (Channing Tatum)and letting Roadblock (The Rock) take over as team leader for me was the biggest letdown in my opinion since he never really looked that great playing the lead role. Bruce Willis was OK a Joe but nothing exciting but for me the best Joe out there would have to be Snake Eyes (Ray Park). His performances were great as usual and really made the movie looked exciting

As for the villains, I really wanted to see Zartan fight with somebody but that didn't happen. Destro was the biggest disappointment for me since they killed his character off just like that. Cobra Commander looked better in this outfit that the previous one but there was really nothing from him but in my opinion, the best villain and character of the entire movie has got to go to Firefly (Ray Stevenson) His character was so wicked cool and I really loved how those nano flys were used as his explosion device. Though a villain, he stood out the most in the film for me I can't say much for the rest of the cast like Storm Shadow and Jinx since there wasn't really anything much from them

However I find it kind of hard to believe that this is a G.I Joe movie since apart from Snake Eyes, there wasn't really anything that made me feel that these guys were the G.I Joes since it felt like there were very little connection between this team to the previous G.I Joe team in the first movie

Overall a bit of a letdown compared to the first movie and it didn't seemed like it was a sequel to the first G.I Joe movie and it wasn't really worth watching it in 3D either
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1/10
What happened to movie? G.I. Joe: Retaliation is ALL BRAWN, and NO BRAIN.
HeartMonger28 March 2013
It's amazing how many good movies produced this year have been relegated to sub-par status, while others that shouldn't be given a glance are given zenith status as great pieces of work, art, and other such pop-cultural sub- standard excrescences achieve more than their worth in fool's gold. One such picture - I'm sorry - movie, that audiences will endure a release of, either glorifyingly, or harshly, is G.I. Joe: Retaliation, the new brawn packed action farce from Paramount Pictures.

Starring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, and with appearances by Bruce Willis and Channing Tatum, the film offers no social commentary, consists of nothing remotely engaging (I tended to doze off on even the action scenes), and pities itself with egregious CGI 3-D effects that disappear mid-air depending on where one sits in the audience. There is no basis for being an audience member, because the effects are so jarring, that the viewer will not be able to involve itself to anything worth sitting for an hour and forty minutes for (which trust me, there wouldn't be anyway.) But that's not the half of the film's problems.

The real problem stems from lack of plot. More like no plot. The film is supposed to be a sequel, or rather, a continuation of the original G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra, but even by todays standards, the filmmakers weren't trying to mark any new ground. All we get is one action sequence after another. Even James Cameron knows you need a through-line of plot device to make these kinds of movies work, but director Jon M. Chu doesn't have enough respect for the audience to even give them that. Instead, we are mindlessly treated to fast shots of punches being thrown, with no idea who is throwing them, why, or if we should care.

Seriously. We only know one thing. The good guys will always win. Never a good sign when you go to the movies to know how they end, with no conscious minding of what it will take to get there. Don't waste your money, my friends. Still, more muscular contractions ache this bastard of a performer.

Those involved knew this was just a paycheck - examine the evidence; Dennis Quaid did not return, and subsequently they need Bruce Willis to carry the big name legacy. Channing Tatum has his screen time terminally reduced, not a great sign because most audiences will probably be wanting to see the film solely for his performance. The writer was clearly hired to write a how-to on perfecting scripts for CGI based stories. This wouldn't be such an insult to film purists and enthusiasts alike if it wasn't such a dreary waste of time and money. There is nothing there in terms of story or structure. The movie starts, and it's action scenes strung together with no link. Then you leave. I would disclose such a plot to entice what viewers may challenge the notion of wasting their money if such a plot existed! It's a disgusting practice of show-off acrobatics by computer geniuses that would be better suited decrypting or ciphering codes left behind from the Zodiac Killer or the Unabomber! This is not why we go to the movies. We go to be entertained, and I predict that many an audience member be robbed of their hard earned cash in this recession, and by such standards and caused an equal recession in film quality! Honestly, there has to be a better place for films in today being tomorrow's history, than this!

An early release for such a seemingly summer blockbuster - it's obvious Paramount wants to get this one out of the way, so they don't have to worry about a summer release tanking to the bottom of the swimming pool (a place where the pre-teens normally disposed to this mendicant tar would be better off spending the day.) It's futile to promote a product without any real integrity, or so I thought. Amazing what a little muscle can do. It's already seen some couple million smackers (across the face!) for it's previews and advance releases, but when it all comes down, G.I. Joe: Retaliation is one hunk of movie that holds a strong PR campaign in it's biceps, but can't think for itself, and never latches on to the timeless fact that the real strength of a movie lies in it's story and it's characters, both factors of the machine that are simultaneously weak.
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5/10
Stale Explosions
billygoat107130 March 2013
G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra feels like it belongs to a different age of blockbusters. It had a hard time fitting in to the modern generation thus most moviegoers never find it as appealing as the other films that was released on that year. Those rants can be true only in some reasons. The film is undeniably silly and dumb but it was never boring and has its own quality. Since people are now asking for darker and much serious blockbusters, this sequel reduces all the silliness that was displayed on the original. G.I. Joe: Retaliation is cooler and less cartoony. Unfortunately, it is also less exciting and terribly uninspired. The action may be better looking but the lack of fortitude and creativity made it fall short into another visual showcase stress.

"Awesome" is the main goal of this sequel. While the original was too corny to impress, this film darkens the tone and made it a bit down to earth. It abandons the silly gadgets and the ridiculous laws of physics that was shown in the original. But the film fails to be both dark and realistic. Not only because of those robotic fireflies and the mass annihilating missiles but the secret prisons and the government are unbelievably dumb to manage their job. Well, it's a blockbuster based on toys so it will never be too realistic. Deal with it while we are here for the fun. The dark aspects aren't dark at all. What they only do is to be serious. This seriousness blocks the potential joy and turns it into standard blockbuster bland.

The storytelling is quite messy. It's like an uninteresting version of Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol with uninteresting characters. The storytelling from the first movie wasn't great either since it is cluttered with cheesy flashbacks. But it's worse here because it takes some twists that are absurdly incoherent. And so, it's all pretentious. The characters are boring and even the performances can't bring them to life. Dwayne Johnson is the only good thing among them though, Bruce Willis is trying to make fun of himself again as a crazy grandaddy, and the villains ham it up which isn't suppose to be a bad thing but they can't give enough personality to them.

The action scenes are acceptable enough to call awesome at least. With all the explosions and the none CGI-ed machines, it seems to be really exciting, but it's not. It does a fine job to be pretty but there's a difference between good looking and exciting. There's only a little suspense. If there is actually suspense and joy then it would be found at the mountain ninja fight but it's just mild and still glosses some slow motions in it. For the rest of the action, the heroes are always superior. Plus more explosions and slow-mos. The action is stylishly directed anyway. The fight between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow remains to be the only action that excites and one part of the climax has a nutty scene with The Rock riding huge vehicles and shooting like a badass. The production designs, special effects, and costumes gets better. What else to talk about it?

The absence of the Joes' ridiculous transportation and weapons, holograms, and other snazzy gadgets may please our modern viewers but it also forgets why this material is interesting anyway. Now we only get typical military stuff. It still has some crazy devices but it's limited compare to the first film. Rise of Cobra wasn't a classic. It's nothing more than a simple guilty pleasure. Same with Retaliation except this one can't even be completely pleasurable unless you want some endless visual coolness. Cool is not a bad thing but it could have been creative and much more exciting instead of showing off slow-mos on screen. To be fair, it's mildly entertaining and good to look at. If the film wasn't this visually awesome, it would have been an empty cinema. The series still fails to justify its source material.
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1/10
Horrible movie
Jawfreenez28 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Not to give too much away but the story is weak and can be summed up with this equation:

4 GI Joes - 3 ninjas = 1 movie you wish you'd never seen!!!

My wife and I sat and waited for action, and waited, them waited some more... It finally came like my brother melting my Duke action figure with a lighter and Aqua-Net. Horrible plot, good special effects, and a stereo-typical ending. The next DirecTV add will say cable is worse than... Sitting thru GI Joe 2.

If you don't believe me, waste your money, then contact me for an "I told you so!"
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6/10
Probably better if you love video games
freemanpatrick725 May 2013
Warning: Spoilers
This is the last time I sit in the middle of the row. Had I been sitting on the aisle I would have left long before the movie was over.

Maybe if I were in the 13 to 24 age bracket and had grown up playing video games...

Or maybe if I were still a little boy at heart and still played video games...

One reviewer lauded the "jaw dropping" visual fx. Really? Was this person exaggerating or just haven't been to the movies in about 20 years? Nothing new here. Same visual fx you'll see in any 200 million movie or a video game.

The bottom line is this movie is just like a big long expensive video game. If you like that then go see it. Except don't be disappointed if they don't let you have the controller.

Don't get me wrong, I think it's totally cool when a bad guy can get run over by and Escalade(after having beaten up The Rock, for crying out loud) and get right back up and run away. It's also kind of cool that he can get on a motorcycle, start it, put it in gear AND ride safely away in less time than it takes for said Escalade to hit a dumpster. Also, it was interesting that Duke had the time to yell "Incoming" get Flint out of the way yet he sits there and takes it like a man. I guess Tatum wanted out of his contract. Maybe he saw this going the same way as Police Academy 15.

I'm not sure why I expect so much from a movie based on a toy. My only question is where will they go next? They have GI Joe, Battle Ship, Transformers, Rock'em Sock'em Robots(Real Steel)... what's next? Toss Across? Battling Tops? Maybe they'll make a sci-fi flick about silly putty. (I wonder if producers read these things to get ideas)

And the dialog was pretty bad. I was trying to remember one particular line that was really bad but I guess it was so disgusting that it ran screaming out of my memory. RZA was the absolute worst part of the whole thing. The Rat in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was a better actor than RZA. Where's Master Po when you need him? I'm not sure why anyone thinks Rappers make good actors.

Anyway, lots of action, some way hot chicks who kick but (always cool, IMO) AND there will probably be another sequel.

If all that sounds like it's worth $10 bucks to you then have at it. I wait until movies come to the $2 theater and sometimes they aren't even worth that much.
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Predictable storyline with great visuals!
stevenrodz28 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
With Channing, Dwayne,Lee, Bruce and most importantly Palicki in this one, you'd expect real fast-paced action with great visuals. On the latter, it delivers as the visuals are great and one of the best of the recent. On the prior, not so much as the storyline drags unnecessarily around the US Prez. Palicki brings in the much needed eye-candy for the hardcore action fans though only in glimpses while Channing, being the chick-magnet gets one big anxious sigh from the ladies in the first half of the movie. Dwayne does what Dwayne does - kicks ass! Cotrona, however looks like he's done this one for free as he hardly has much to do and beats me why he's even there. Snake eyes, Jinx, Zartan & Firefly entertain as characters with purpose. RZA is a big LOL.

There's muscle,hard-hitting physical combat action, sensuality, technology, star-appeal and pretty interesting automobiles. All you need if you're an action fan. Now if only they could somehow mysteriously put in an interesting and not-so-predictable storyline, then we'd have a real blockbuster hit worth your ticket money!
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8/10
Thrilling ride if you don't take it seriously
CMTiago3 April 2014
The sequel to the first G.I.Joe movie gathered some negative reviews like its predecessor. This kind of thing doesn't deter me from watching any movie and one of the reasons is because you have to understand what kind of movie you're going to watch. I know that this is a mindless action flick with a simple plot. It's entertaining and it doesn't have to prove a point by being a perfectly constructed movie. It's meant to look cool and lack any real depth. After getting that out of my system, I can say that I enjoyed watching Retaliation and will try to watch it many times in the future, as this is the kind of film I watch when I wanna have fun. Ranging from The Rock to Willis this movie has very stylistic characters that ultimately kick ass with the Snake Eyes/Storm Shadow battles coming to mind. The special effects also look impressive, particularly in one massive destruction scene. If you like to just lay back and see great fights and a little eye candy then this is the movie for you. Anyone trying to be logic about this I'll just tell you that you are wasting your time.

Rating 8/10
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9/10
Why the bad reviews?
niallorourke32128 April 2013
I'll start off by saying that I really enjoyed this movie. At times it made me laugh, at times it gave me frights, there were many times when it set my pulse racing. It's an action movie, its supposed to. Not once did it make me think of how flawed western civilization really is, or put tears in my eyes, or make me appreciate living in a 21st century, western country, with plenty to eat, drink etc. Its an action movie, it's NOT supposed to.

And thats where I find some of these reviews annoying. If you go to the cinema to see a movie called GI Joe: Retaliation, which is an action movie, you should only rate it accordingly. This movie easily fulfills all the criteria for a good action film, so if you want to go see an action movie, then yes, go see this. The acting isn't bad, the plot is fairly good and the visuals are incredible. But if you want to see a realistic film, one that will make you smile, sob, or think about life, do not go see this film. What this film is, is 2 hours entertainment. It will have you glued to the screen for that 2 hours (especially if you see it in 3D). I would recommend GI Joe: Retaliation to anyone from about the age of ten up, as long as you walk into the cinema or press play expecting to see a good action movie. If you do this, you will be thoroughly entertained for 2 hours. Enjoy!
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1/10
Add to List of Worst Sequels
adam-stocker31 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
After 2009, surprisingly well done Rise of Cobra, I was expecting an entertain sequel anticipating how the writers and director would tie in Zartan as President. It seems the studio decided to reboot the franchise by decided to continue parts of the previous storyline which fails horribly. The movie ends up being a mashed up, thrown together movie with little continuation of the previous storyline and muscular actors whose roles are just being muscular people with guns. The movies basic premise is around nuclear disarmament. With the GI Joe's forced to rebuild and discover the plan of Cobra before they destroy the world.

The only good part of the movie is the opening where The Rock and Channing Tatum display the only enjoyable on screen chemistry of any of the actors. Unfortunately, that chemistry is blown up roughly 15 minutes in when Tatum's character is blown up. When Tatum is killed The Rock's character is upset for about two minutes. Stranded in a desert, The Rock, Lady Jaye and Flint somehow manage to make it back to America. Though how is unknown. To avoid being found, the trio hide in an abandon rec centre where they find weights and old computers from over a decade ago. Yet 5 minutes later is all upgraded to state of the art technology, in which lady Jaye is able to find videos of the present discover his commonly used phrases and hand position before and after Zartan has become President. Yes all this on 1995 technology that magically upgrades and takes her a matter of hours. Now the side plot which is equally as awful. Stormshadow who appeared to be dead at the end of the first movie somehow is alive. Stormshadow breaks Cobra commander out of prison leaving destro. But is badly burn during his escape. To recover from his burns, Stormshadow travels to the mountains where he is revived. SnakeEyes and his protégé climb the mountain drug Stormshadow to return him to the place of their training as seen in the first movie. As in the first movie they are trying Stormshadow for murdering the master. Stormshadow then proves to the council he is not guilty as it was not his sword. Back video shows it was Zartan in disgust. Stormshadow joins the Joes in fight against Cobra. Need I say more the plot is illogical leaving anyone who saw the first movie scratching their heads. Flint and Lady Jaye prove to be nothing more than eye candy for the viewer as they have very little back story and don't advance the previous story. The films ending action sequence is rushed and poorly planned out. The scene boils down to the Joes showing up little planning and no story on where the building is there are attacking. Yet kill everyone but Cobra commander and save the day.
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1/10
franchise ruined
pittsburghsucks1 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Horrible movie......Duke dies in the first 30 minutes, storm shadows resurrection is never explained, destro is off the team??? then why does cobra commander save him in the first one. Zartan really killed snake eyes/storm shadows master in a plot to turn storm bad? how old is zartan then? plus when storm shadow does the unspeakable and joins the joes and kills zartan,shouldn't he still be alive despite getting stabbed due to the nanomytes? he only cuts half his face off in front of the pres. then to make things funnier bruce willis out of no where has a team of old timers to join their mission to save the world. oh yeah, and firefly gets killed, one of the coolest cobra villains. aside from all of that garbage, the movie seemed liked it jumped too much, the action didn't tie in well and when there was action, it was minimal with no big epic joe/cobra scenes. not even worth renting...
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1/10
Garbage
ian-johnson04202 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Really guys I know that sequels tend to screw up the 1st movie but this was bad the only thing that held true to the 1st movie was zartan????? I mean really ZARTAN SO MANY GREAT CHARACTERS IN THE 1ST MOVIE AND THEY PICK ZARTAN...... rip chord wtf really and no original joes why does Hollywood always screw up sequels. only movies like lethalweapon and die hard were able to do the action sequel why cmon stick to a story. in an economy like ours is right now I would not waste 10.00 to see this garbage movie. I am upset that I did I wqas so upset I walked out of the movie and demanded a refund. in closing if you have no previous wants from the last movie then watch good action but as far as G.I. Joe is concerned this movie was crap
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1/10
I regret spending money on this and losing 2 hrs of sleep for this
pavis2228 March 2013
all the other reviews said it all. so ill keep it short and sweet. Don't WASTE YOUR MONEY ON THIS.

the execs held this film back because the original competition would have blown the Joe's outta the water and they want to profit as much as possible.

i felt ripped off. i will put as many bad reviews as possible everywhere i can since this was such a low budget low quality film that will possibly kill the franchise. the execs only cared about making money off of a name. because clearly the writers never saw the first film and damn sure never saw the cartoon or had any experience writing films
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Guys and Dolls
tedg6 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I suppose it is natural to define a self from negatives: what you are not. So much in public life depends on this dynamic. It is a dangerous urge that I often see out of control, and one I want to closely monitor in my own life.

One place I really let it go is when I see a bad movie. Under the best of circumstances, I'd be able to see only films that nourish some creative evolution in my soul. With some discipline, bad movies allow me much the same benefit if I can understand what separates me from it.

There's the obvious stuff to react against of course. The movie borrows as much as it can from the 1970s and does so with no irony. It really is misogynistic, jingoistic and celebrates dumbness. None of this is a joke. Plot points are from 35 years ago: the suitcase, the complex plan with nukes, the notion that national leaders really can do absurd things by themselves... even with Goldfinger this was a joke.

The idea that two turbaned (?) Pakstanis would be hand carrying a nuke on scaffolding is bizarre, Plan 9 from Outer Space level stuff.

The focus on guns as icons; when Bruce Willis reveals his hidden arsenal, we are supposed to have a frothy pumped up admiration of the devices, a flood of admiration for the size of the cache. Willis isn't allowed to wink at us as he usually does. We really are supposed to cheer.

Even when there is some modern reference, they carry it with a dated juvenile attitude: "they call it waterboarding but I never get bored" is possibly the most revolting failed joke of the era.

All that is obnoxious. This is a franchise movie, designed to sell toys to nine year olds, so the intent of these offensive tropes is particularly unsettling. I'd never want a child to see this until he/she could build fences around the weeds.

When I'm in the US, I see films in an audience dominated by military and their families. After the disastrous wars in Iraq and Afganistan, they are particularly conscious of good honest souls doing their duty. And then having their lives wasted. They know that the guys guarding the president at the end are just regular soldiers who showed up for duty. It is hard to cheer when they get wasted for our amusement. For that matter, what about the several million inhabitants of London who get annihilated as a demo.

But if I just react to these sorts of things, I lose, because there is no cleverness, no construction is seeing these stupidities. What is it about this that makes it bad storytelling and bad cinema?

I heavily criticize the Marvel movies. But that is because they are poor cinema; generally the storytelling is crackerjack. I think Tarantino is usually worthless but I do credit him with knowing how to put together a cinematic story.

Why this film is uncinematic is an easy shot. Clearly, what they did was divide up the film and budget and send the parts out to centers all over the world. That means that it has no soul. One moment, you'll be swinging with cartoon ninjas in the Himalayas in three D effects clearly added afterwards, and then the fight goes through a window and an amateur crew shoots two huffy guys rolling in the snow. We are jerked from a writer-director stance of a buddy movie, to cheap explosions, to more than one poor imitations of comicdom. It lacks coherence so it lacks soul.

One would almost think it was intended. If the idea is to sell dolls so that juvenile testosterone surges can be monetized, then perhaps there is some wisdom in erasing the humanity from the thing so that kids can pour themselves in more readily. But no. As was once said of a past US president, the stupidity is not a sly act.

You can see some of the difficulties they faced. Because they are selling dolls they have to interrupt the situation at hand to give character-defining backstory, so you have built in fragmentation. They have to live with the legacy dolls, I suppose. Marvel has a similar problem with The Avengers, which they solved by having each major character have his own introductory movie(s).

The fascinating part for me is the shuffling of two worlds. One world is the gutsy army guy with big guns. He has no superpower and it is all about the guns and the mania. This world is elaborated by having an eternal enemy army and a group of special forces types including a woman. The stereotypes draw from war movies and there is a sort of beauty in closing the loop from movie concepts to toy play to movie about the play.

But there is also the ninja world, wholly separate in concept and with an origin in a different film genre. Here, ninja magic is routine and derived from a magical jewel. Something like superpowers are assumed. The skill in battle comes not from being bold but from long training with masters.

Previous comics and cartoons provide extensive backstory of the Arashikage Clan (the good guys) and the characters we see here. There is (I read) a thorough weaving of the two worlds in the backstories: some soldiers join the clan and the clan evolves to support the GI Joes. But the problem is not that someone hasn't 'explained' the connection, but that they really do live in worlds with different physics.

One is a world of bravado and bullets while the other is a matter of stealth and skill. Battle, devotion, honor, comrades all have different non-overlapping meanings. It just cannot work.

Ted's Evaluation -- 1 of 3: You can find something better to do with this part of your life.
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1/10
The actors don't care, the writers don't care, I certainly don't care.
amichaels5709 May 2013
I was absolutely disgusted with this film. It wasn't particularly offensive to any particular group (although the film's depiction of Muslims in one scene and the fact that every Asian character in the movie is a Ninja will likely raise a few eyebrows) so much as it was to its audience. The film expects the audience to believe outlandish scenes so long as there are explosions. The film is "short"(although it feels long) but even with the film's length about 1/2 of the scenes are utterly pointless. The opening scene involves some event in a North Korean factory...that event is never mentioned again.

The acting in this film was dreadful. Every actor appears to be sleeping their way through the film waiting for their next paycheck. I've seen better acting in Super Bowl advertisements than I have in this film. Granted, none of these actors are particularly talented in the first place, but this movie makes them look even worse than before. It is also painful to watch Bruce Willis lose another shred of his dignity, which is now lesser than his hair.

Even the special effects were sub-par. There are a few decent explosions, but one scene in particular involving ninjas on a mountain top looks more like a video game than a feature film. The problem with the action scenes in this movie is that we don't care about the characters; they're all identical in terms of personality. If I don't care about your character, I don't care if your character lives or dies or how your character lives or dies. And if the actors don't even care, I certainly don't care.

Overall, if you want a "popcorn flick," you can find something far better than this.
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6/10
Better than the original, but not really great
estebangonzalez1030 March 2013
¨Call me JOE¨

As a kid I was a huge fan of the GI Joe cartoons and had a vast collection of the action figures, but I never thought it was a very good idea to bring the franchise to the big screen. I didn't like the first film despite all the great special effects because the entire concept was just way too silly, and I didn't like this film all that much either despite the fact it had a better story and some more interesting characters. What really saved this film for me was a ten minute action scene in the mountains which was pretty amazing and made the entire movie worthwhile. It was one of the best action scenes I've seen all year. This second film was directed by Jon M. Chu (Justin Bieber Never Say Never and Step Up 2) and the screenplay co-written by Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick (Zombieland), but very few actors are back from the original movie (only five) so this felt like a totally different movie. Retaliation is much better than Rise of Cobra but it still felt a little light due to the nonstop action. It's one of those movies you can enjoy for two hours but forget about once it's over. What it does have going for it is that is includes better action stars like The Rock and Bruce Willis. The Rock is probably one of the best contemporary action stars and he already brought the Fast and Furious franchise back alive again. He doesn't quite do the same with GI Joe, but he still makes this movie a little more enjoyable than the original one. Despite all the cheesiness of the plot I still had some fun, and the producers knew that the premise couldn't be taken seriously so they just played around with it.

The Joes continue to serve and protect the world under the leadership of Captain Duke (Channing Tatum) and his team which consists of Roadblock (Dwayne Johnson aka The Rock), Flint (D.J. Cotrona), and Jaye (Adrianne Palicki). They have a couple of successful missions until the team is betrayed by the US president (Jonathan Pryce) who is actually Zartan (Arnold Vosloo) infiltrated as him. Thus the Joes are forced to fight enemy forces inside their own government and are forced to receive help from the only person they can trust: retired General Joe Colton (Bruce Willis). Meanwhile Storm Shadow (Byung-hun Lee) has conceived a plan with Firefly (Ray Stevenson) to free their imprisoned Cobra Commander (Luke Bracey). Snake Eyes (Ray Park) is determined to stop him with the help of Jinx (Elodie Yung), but the Joes are running out of time with the President threatening the world with a nuclear war. Will the Joes be able to stop the Cobra team before they destroy the entire world?

Channing Tatum and The Rock shared some funny scenes together and had great chemistry, but I would have enjoyed more screen time with them. Adrianne Palicki looked great in that red dress and was a good addition to the film. Cotrona and Willis didn't do much, but the highlight of the film was the mountain action sequence between Park and Lee. The film had its extremely cheesy moments, and I couldn't believe they even didn't care about the explosion of London. They continued as if nothing ever happened and celebrated the success of the mission without considering the devastating loss. I think that was probably the worst part of the film and the entire scene was probably used to attract people through the trailers. Retaliation is big and loud, anticipation for what is to come in the blockbuster summer movies. By the time summer gets here we will probably have forgotten all about this movie, but it was still a fun and entertaining two hours. Even those people that will end up hating this film will have to agree that the ten minute action scene between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow was pretty entertaining. As long as you don't think too much about what's going on you might enjoy this senseless film.
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5/10
Well... That stunk
lorenthomas8520 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I am not a die hard movie buff. I enjoy watching several different genres and have several favorite actors. But I would not say that I am a opening night have to see it kinda guy. Saying that I was excited that GI Joe was coming out with the second movie. I understood that many people didn't like the first one. I did not only because of the story line but also because of the special effects. (SPOILER) But killing off a top name actor in the first act is pretty much crap. Not only did you kill him off in the first act I didn't feel anything from the other Joe's. besides "Johnson's" little scene of him taking the dog tag. So you killed off a great actor and "Duke" one of the larger names associated with the toys and cartoon in the first act and never brought him back later in the story line or made his death mean anything... SPOILER) I tell you what if you want anybody to see the next film,"if there even is one" send me a ticket. I won't be buying one at the theaters.
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7/10
G.I.Joe: Retaliation movie review- ridiculous and lovely!
achyutaghosh29 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
The good- GI Joe Retaliation is infinitely bigger, louder and thankfully so- better than its predecessor. Breath-taking, non stop action, great VFX, deadpan heroes and femme fatals , great soundtrack and gizmo's that will shame 007, it ticks most of the boxes for a summer action flick. The bad- not that the leads are great actors, but back to back to back action set pieces leave little room for acting, the dialogs are as banal as they can get, and the climax is cartoonishly over the top.

Retaliation takes off from where Rise of Cobra ended, and the movie is best enjoyed by folks versed in the Joes legend - the President of the US has been replaced by Zartan aided with some cool nanomite wizardry. The time-line is a mix of alternate and real history- Pakistan is a failed state and the Joes are sent to retrieve the country's nuclear arsenal. But it is a trap- the President is after all a Cobra operative, and he wipes out the entire GI Joe force including the hero from the previous film Duke (Channing Tatum), except for the intrepid trio of Roadblock (The Rock- Dwayne Johnson) , Lady Jaye (Adrianne Palicki) and Flint (D J Cotrona). It is up to these three along with the original Joe, Bruce Willis to expose the fraud president and prevent global annihilation.

GI Joe action figures gained popularity in the mid 80s, when the world was falling at the feet of Japan- economic hatchbacks, Walkman, ninjas, VCR et all-action movies in the 80s paid homage to Japan (anyone remember Robocop 3?). The Japanese angle in GI Joe is Snake Eyes, Jinx and Storm Shadow- together they deliver one of the finest one on one sword fight in a monastery, and then director Jon Chu goes one step better to give your ticket worth price 3D action sequence in snow capped Himalayan territory when Snake Eyes and Jinyx escape from a platoon of ninjas whooshing between peaks, rappelling sheer cliffs, braving avalanches, gunfire and swords. The trailer features some of this out of the word stunt-work, but the full experience of this in the movie is amazing, so much so that after this, the other Joes do not matter anymore- its Snake Eyes that your eyes will follow, and i think it is about time he got his solo movie- he is cool enough! I was happy to see Dwayne Johnson return to his roots- the Rock always adds class to any role he takes on, he has his family audience fans, but he is first and foremost an action star, with a sweet core. Jonathan Pryce as the President is delightfully funny as a villain reveling in his new found power and Bruce Willis totes his own brand of hairless machismo.

This is Hasbro's third live adaption of its action figures/toys- after Transformers and Battleships. So if you are above 12, it will feel ridiculous, funny and overblown. Characters do not have names, just tags. Things get blown up big, and there is a villain thirsting for "world dominion". This is not mature and contemplative graphic novel adaptation- this is the cinematic equivalent of a Big Mac meal, the ultimate junk food, and like the Mac meal it gives the kick and leaves a sweet feeling too . I grew up on comic books and action figures, and perhaps the greatest kick I get out of these kind of movies is the magical transport back to childhood. For guts and for glory, for guns and for action, for setting the summer of 2013 on fire - 7/10. Boo-ya-ah!
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6/10
Could be a better movie.
minngyang27 July 2013
First of all, I am so happy to see The Rock and Bruce Willis joining the cast, the movie suddenly looks so huge with them. But I still hate how they trimmed almost all of the original cast, I like Ana and Scarlett, and it definitely will be more amusing if Ripcord is in this sequel. Luckily they kept Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow, they are just as awesome as they were in the previous film, really enjoy the rival show of these two character.

The story line is average, the plot is weird, doesn't have ups and downs, only a parallel line from beginning to the end. There is no climax in G.I Joe: Retaliation, but if you say the movie is excited at all time, it would be hard to argue.

There are not much advanced and cool weapon stuffs in this sequel, probably to fit the story, I'd say it is actually kinda boring compare to the previous G.I. Joe movie. However, some of the scene is pretty entertained tho.

Overall, with good actors and good special effect, G.I. Joe: Retaliation only needs a better screenplay to be a better movie.
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1/10
I was disappointed with this film in comparison to the one before it.
sbeauchamp20127 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I came into watching this film under the premise that it was gong to be about the revenge of cobra commander. The first film "The Rise of Cobra" was very well done with incredible graphics, action sequences, and an encompassing plot that made sense and was consistent with the storyline. However in this film there wasn't a plot. The movie went in every direction without a singular purpose that made sense. Honestly the action sequence and graphics were incredible, but thats all the film offered. I never clearly understood the changes in setting. It was like beginning all the Joes die except a few. They plot the demise of the president. And Cobra attempts revenge. But other than that, I don't know what the plot was or why the director found it fitting to not make a plausible plot. I was very disappointed with this film and was hoping for even better performance than the first film.
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4/10
Disappointing
janishm-825-78627828 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
After the Rise of Cobra (2009) not that it was a great movie, I expected much more as the sequel especially as it comes after fours and honestly if you may believe the first one seems much better than this one.

The movie has nothing new to offer in terms of plot, which is wafer thin. The SFX do try to make up for the same. Barring, the acrobatic action sequence in the snowy mountains, nothing else held my attention in the movie.

The acting is below par as expected of 'Blockbusters', but even the humor is missing. I really don't know why Bruce Willis is there and it seems clearly an after thought of having him there to add to the 'STAR' power.

I watched it in IMAX 3D and really felt as I wasted my time and money, if you really want to watch this one wait for it on DVD.

2 out 5...
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8/10
A solid improvement over Rise of Cobra! Thumbs up!
I'm not exactly a fan of the GI Joe franchise, but I seemed to have found myself liking "The Rise of Cobra" aside from it's predictable storyline and uneven script and called it a guilty pleasure for me. So, I went to see this sequel on the opening weekend and it exceeded my expectations thereafter and delivered what the trailers had promised. It's not an excellent film by any means, but in my honest opinion, this is a great sequel and is much better than the previous installment despite the negative reception it received. I will admit, however, that there are some parts that got dragged and the beginning was way too rushed for my liking; and while most of the action sequences are thrilling thanks to Jon M. Chu's solid effort, some of them gave me a bit of a headache in it's shaky camera form.

Flaws aside, everything else is perfect. The cast has improved a bit, but not that much. Channing Tatum's role as Duke has improved seeing as how he was beyond bland in the previous film and I liked his chemistry with Roadblock played by Dwayne Johnson who pulls off the role really well throughout the film. Bruce Willis steals the show as General Colton with his witty one-liners. The rest of the acting, however, ranges from OK to just forgettable.

The directing from Jon M. Chu isn't perfect, but it's decent and a bit more focused on the story, which isn't exactly the best, but it's not as contrived as Rise of Cobra's plot. I kind of liked the idea of a nuclear missile that can destroy an entire city in the whole planet and it sort of leaves up for another sequel if it would get made. The script is very interesting and it has some nice plot twists. The editing is slick, the scenery is nice to look at, and the cinematography is great. Henry Jackman's music score is OK with some solid action cues, but most of the music is pretty obvious.

Overall, GI Joe: Retaliation isn't an excellent, but like I said before, it's a much better installment to the franchise. To those who haven't seen it yet, I suggest that you should try. It is a good film worth recommending!
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