Jeff is an ordinary guy that is stuck at a dead end job with a boring life, but when a strange old man gives him an Ancient relic and tells him that he is the last bloodline of H.P. ...
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Jeff is an ordinary guy that is stuck at a dead end job with a boring life, but when a strange old man gives him an Ancient relic and tells him that he is the last bloodline of H.P. Lovecraft, He and his friend Charlie embark on an adventure to protect the relic piece from falling into the hands of the Starspawn and his minions that wish to reunite the relic and release Cthulhu back into the world.Written by
When the Cult of the Cthulu uncover the first of 2 pieces of a relic needed to unlock the Cthulu's prison, it's up to the last remaining bloodline of H.P. Lovecraft to protect the remaining piece from the Cult of Cthulu's possession or the Cthulu will be unleashed on the planet. For a movie about Cthulu, there's a COMPLETE absence of Cthulu. The whole film is a giant mis-step. Our main characters are extremely unlikable, the direction seems confused and the editing does nothing but squander what's left of this ultra low budget waste of time. There's nothing wrong with low budget films. I love them. This is a prime example of the kind of movies that give low budget films a bad rep. It's too cool for school attitude gets old in the first 10 minutes. "Fu@k" is said on an average of one time per sentence and feels so forced that it's uncomfortable. I shouldn't be consciously aware of how often the characters are swearing. It unnatural and completely out of place. The character of Paul is the only highlight of the whole group although since The Hangover, it seems like every fat hairy character in a comedy has to be the same person. There are a few moments of entertainment but 45 minutes in I was already calling "bullsh@t" and there was no help on the horizon. The editing takes away every comedic beat, or moment of action and pulverizes it into a helpless mess of mediocrity. This is being compared to Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer and Shaun of the Dead. That's like comparing Shark Attack 2 to Jaws and Alien. The only good thing I can say about it, is that 90 percent of the effects were done practically. That's a rare thing in movies like this these days and it's nice to see people still making an effort to do that, even if they don't look that good. I could recommend any number of other things to watch, but you're best bet is to just grab something randomly and watch it instead of this. There were two people responsible for this. One of them directed. One of them wrote it. They both produced it and edited it. There's the problem. They should've given the job to someone else and saved a lot of people an hour and a half. There aren't enough films with this subject matter. They didn't have to ruin it for everyone else.
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