4.0/10
129
2 user 5 critic

Cleavagefield (2009)

TV-MA | | Comedy, Horror | TV Movie 1 April 2009

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(as Salvadore Ross)

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Cast

Credited cast:
Tallulah Blankhead
... (as Brandee Schaefer)
Lucia Santos
Julie K. Smith
Davina Murphy
Dallas Lowe
Barrett Blade
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Genres:

Comedy | Horror

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Release Date:

1 April 2009 (USA)  »

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Budget:

$100,000 (estimated)
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Did You Know?

Connections

Spoofs Cloverfield (2008) See more »

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User Reviews

 
Neither sexy nor funny
18 March 2011 | by See all my reviews

I typically love Wynorski's softcore films, as we appear to have very similar taste in actresses, but this one was a huge miss. A lot of the women involved weren't up to his typical standards of attractiveness, the acting as in some points so terrible (even for the genre) as to be painful to watch, and the attempt to cover up low production values through use of the Cloverfield shaky-cam excuse was transparent.

I hate to sound so negative on it, as there are some aspects I should have been a big fan of. Julie K. Smith looked sexy as usual at least, and Rebecca Love brought an impressive chest as well. The extremely gorgeous girl from the intro never appeared again, unfortunately, which was very upsetting considering I thought she was by far one of the best looking girls in this movie.

I tend to focus on the positive, and try not to badmouth any of the actors or actresses involved, but Lucia Santos was so terrible I can't help but say something. Please, Mr. Wynorski, never again! I thought that after the Da Vinci Coed you would have learned better. Going beyond bad acting, she doesn't even appear to be able to speak English very well, and she just does not have the looks to make up for it. If you include some Eastern European big breasted supermodel type, well, I can forgive her being totally unintelligible. In this case, however, she did not bring enough to pull it off.

The monster was actually the best part of the movie, in a totally campy way. It was so comical as to be actually cute. I'm glad there was no attempt to make the monster realistically scary, as the low overall quality of the rest of this film makes me think it would have been a disaster.


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