Jesse Eisenberg credited as playing...
Mark Zuckerberg
- Gage: Mr. Zuckerberg, do I have your full attention?
- Mark Zuckerberg: [stares out the window] No.
- Gage: Do you think I deserve it?
- Mark Zuckerberg: [looks at Gage] What?
- Gage: Do you think I deserve your full attention?
- Mark Zuckerberg: I had to swear an oath before we began this deposition, and I don't want to perjure myself, so I have a legal obligation to say no.
- Gage: Okay - no. You don't think I deserve your attention.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I think if your clients want to sit on my shoulders and call themselves tall, they have the right to give it a try - but there's no requirement that I enjoy sitting here listening to people lie. You have part of my attention - you have the minimum amount. The rest of my attention is back at the offices of Facebook, where my colleagues and I are doing things that no one in this room, including and especially your clients, are intellectually or creatively capable of doing.
- [pauses]
- Mark Zuckerberg: Did I adequately answer your condescending question?
- Gretchen: 18,000 dollars?
- Eduardo Saverin: Yes.
- Gretchen: In addition to the $1,000 you'd already put up?
- Eduardo Saverin: Yes.
- Gretchen: A total of $19,000 now?
- Eduardo Saverin: Yes.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Hang on.
- [Mark sarcastically adds up the 2 amounts on his notepad]
- Mark Zuckerberg: I'm just checking your math on that. Yes, I got the same thing.
- Mark Zuckerberg: You signed the papers.
- Eduardo Saverin: [almost in tears] You set me up.
- Mark Zuckerberg: You're gonna blame me because you were the business head of the company and you made a bad business deal with your own company?
- Eduardo Saverin: This is gonna be like I'm not a part of Facebook!
- Sean Parker: It won't be like you're not a part of Facebook. You're not a part of Facebook.
- Eduardo Saverin: My name's on the masthead.
- Sean Parker: You might wanna check again.
- Eduardo Saverin: Just because I froze the account?
- Sean Parker: Did you think we were going to let you parade around in your ridiculous suits pretending you were running this company?
- Eduardo Saverin: [cutting him off; screaming] Sorry! My Prada's at the cleaners! Along with my hoodie and my 'fuck you' flip-flops, you pretentious douchebag!
- Sean Parker: Security's here, you'll be leaving now.
- Eduardo Saverin: I'm not signing those papers.
- Sean Parker: We will get the signature.
- Eduardo Saverin: [to Mark] Tell me this isn't about me getting into the Phoenix.
- [Mark scoffs]
- Eduardo Saverin: [in disbelief] You... You did it! I knew you did it! You planted that story about the chicken!
- Mark Zuckerberg: I didn't plant the story about the chicken.
- Sean Parker: What's he talking about?
- Eduardo Saverin: You had me accused of animal cruelty.
- Sean Parker: Seriously, what the hell's the chicken?
- Eduardo Saverin: [leans down close to Mark, his voice low and dangerous] And I'll bet what you hated the most was that they identified me as a co-founder of Facebook, which I am. You better lawyer up asshole, because I'm not coming back for 30%, I'm coming back for EVERYTHING.
- [backs away from Mark slowly, still looking at him]
- Mark Zuckerberg: As for any charges stemming from the breach of security, I believe I deserve some recognition from this board.
- Ad Board Chairwoman: I'm sorry?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Yes?
- Ad Board Chairwoman: I don't understand.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Which part?
- Bob: You know, I could swear he was looking at you when he said 'The next Bill Gates could be right in this room'.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I... I doubt it.
- Bob: I showed up late, I don't even know who the speaker was.
- Mark Zuckerberg: It was Bill Gates.
- Bob: Shit, that makes sense.
- Mark Zuckerberg: You know, you really don't need a forensics team to get to the bottom of this. If you guys were the inventors of Facebook, you'd have invented Facebook.
- Divya Narendra: You invented something in high school too, right?
- Mark Zuckerberg: An app for an MP3 player that recognizes your taste in music.
- Divya Narendra: Anybody try to buy it?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Microsoft.
- Divya Narendra: Wow. How much?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Didn't sell it, uploaded it for free.
- Divya Narendra: For free?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
- Divya Narendra: [Looking a little puzzled] Why?
- [Mark shrugs]
- Erica Albright: [Angry] I'm sorry you are not sufficiently impressed with my education.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I'm sorry I don't have a rowboat, so we're even.
- Erica Albright: I think we should just be friends.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I don't want friends.
- Erica Albright: I was just being polite, I have no intention of being friends with you.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Ma'am, I know you've done your homework and so you know that money isn't a big part of my life, but at the moment I could buy Mt. Auburn Street, take the Phoenix Club, and turn it into my ping-pong room.
- [first lines]
- Mark Zuckerberg: Did you know there are more people with genius IQs living in China than there are people of any kind living in the United States?
- Erica Albright: That can't possibly be true.
- Mark Zuckerberg: It is.
- Erica Albright: What would account for that?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Well first, an awful lot of people live in China. But, here's my question: how do you distinguish yourself in a population of people who all got 1600 on their SATs?
- Erica Albright: I didn't know they take SATs in China.
- Mark Zuckerberg: They don't. I wasn't talking about China anymore, I was talking about me.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Your date looks so familiar to me.
- Sean Parker: She looks familiar to a lot of people.
- Mark Zuckerberg: What do you mean?
- Sean Parker: A Stanford MBA named Roy Raymond wants to buy his wife some lingerie but he's too embarrassed to shop for it at a department store. He comes up with an idea for a high end place that doesn't make you feel like a pervert. He gets a $40,000 bank loan, borrows another $40,000 from his in-laws, opens a store, and calls it Victoria's Secret. Makes a half million dollars his first year. He starts a catalog, opens three more stores and after five years he sells the company to Leslie Wexner and the Limited for four million dollars. Happy ending, right? Except two years later, the company's worth 500 million dollars and Roy Raymond jumps off the Golden Gate Bridge. Poor guy just wanted to buy his wife a pair of thigh-highs.
- Erica Albright: You called me a bitch on the Internet, Mark.
- Mark Zuckerberg: That's why I wanted to talk to you.
- Erica Albright: On the Internet.
- Mark Zuckerberg: That's why I came over.
- Erica Albright: Comparing women to farm animals.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I didn't end up doing that.
- Erica Albright: It didn't stop you from writing it. As if every thought that tumbles through your head was so clever it would be a crime for it not to be shared. The Internet's not written in pencil, Mark, it's written in ink. And you published that Erica Albright was a bitch, right before you made some ignorant crack about my family's name, my bra size, and then rated women based on their hotness.
- Reggie: Erica, is there a problem?
- Erica Albright: [Turning to talk to Reggie] No, there's no problem.
- Erica Albright: [Turning back to face Mark] You write your snide bullshit from a dark room because that's what the angry do nowadays. I was nice to you, don't torture me for it.
- Mark Zuckerberg: If we could just go somewhere for a minute.
- Erica Albright: I don't want to be rude to my friends.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Okay.
- Erica Albright: Okay.
- [pauses for a moment]
- Erica Albright: Good luck with your video-game.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I went to my friend for the money because that's who I wanted to be partners with. Eduardo was the president of the Harvard Investors Association, and he was also my best friend.
- Gage: Your best friend is suing you for six hundred million dollars.
- Mark Zuckerberg: [Sarcastically] I didn't know that, tell me more.
- Erica Albright: I'm going back to my dorm.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Wait, wait! Is this real?
- Erica Albright: Yes!
- Mark Zuckerberg: Okay, then wait. I apologize, okay?
- Erica Albright: I have to go study.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Erica...
- Erica Albright: [Harsh and angry] Yes?
- Mark Zuckerberg: I'm sorry, I mean it.
- Erica Albright: I appreciate that, but I have to go study.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Come on, you don't have to study, you don't have to study, let's just talk.
- Erica Albright: I can't.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Why?
- Erica Albright: Because it is exhausting! Dating you is like dating a StairMaster!
- Mark Zuckerberg: All I meant is that you're not likely to... currently. I wasn't making a comment on your appearance, I was saying that you go to BU. I was stating a fact, that's all. And if it seemed rude, than of course I apologize.
- Erica Albright: I have to go study.
- Mark Zuckerberg: You don't have to study.
- Erica Albright: [Exasperated and angry] Why do you keep saying I don't have to study?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Because you go to BU!
- Erica Albright: [Erica stares at him, furious]
- Mark Zuckerberg: Do you want to get some food?
- Eduardo Saverin: Mark. Mark!
- Sean Parker: He's wired in.
- Eduardo Saverin: Sorry?
- Sean Parker: He's wired in.
- Eduardo Saverin: Is he?
- Sean Parker: Yes.
- [takes Mark's laptop and smashes it down on the desk, destroying it]
- Eduardo Saverin: How about now? You still wired in?
- Sean Parker: Call security.
- Eduardo Saverin: You issued 24 million new shares of stock.
- Mark Zuckerberg: You were told that if new investors came along...
- Eduardo Saverin: How much were your shares diluted?
- [points to Sean]
- Eduardo Saverin: How much were his?
- Marylin Delpy: What are you doing?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Checking in to see how it's going in Bosnia.
- Marylin Delpy: Bosnia. They don't have roads, but they have Facebook.
- [Mark says nothing]
- Marylin Delpy: You must really hate the Winklevosses.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I don't hate anybody. The "Winklevii" aren't suing me for intellectual property theft. They're suing me because for the first time in their lives, things didn't go exactly the way they were supposed to for them.
- Erica Albright: Well, why don't you just concentrate on being the best you you can be.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Did you really just say that?
- Erica Albright: I was kidding. Although just because something's trite doesn't make it any less true.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I want to try to be straightforward with you and tell you I think you might want to be a little more supportive. If I get in I will be taking you to the events, and the gatherings, and you'll be meeting a lot of people you wouldn't normally get to meet.
- Erica Albright: [Erica stares at Mark for a moment, then smiles] You would do that for me?
- Mark Zuckerberg: [Shrugs] We're dating.
- Erica Albright: Okay. Well I want to be straightforward with you and let you know that we're not anymore.
- Mark Zuckerberg: What do you mean?
- Erica Albright: We're not dating anymore, I'm sorry.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Is this a joke?
- Erica Albright: No, it's not.
- Mark Zuckerberg: You're breaking up with me?
- Erica Albright: You're going to introduce me to people I wouldn't normally have the chance to to meet? What the f... what is that supposed to mean?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Wait. Settle down...
- Erica Albright: What is it supposed to mean?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Erica, the reason we're able to sit here and drink right now is because you used to sleep with the door guy.
- Erica Albright: The door guy? His name is Bobby. I have not slept with the door guy. The door guy is a friend of mine, and he is a perfectly good class of people. And what part of Long Island are you from, Wimbledon?
- Eduardo Saverin: [Answering a call from Mark on his cell phone] Yeah?
- Mark Zuckerberg: You froze our account?
- Eduardo Saverin: I did.
- Mark Zuckerberg: You froze the account!
- Eduardo Saverin: I had to get your attention Mark.
- Mark Zuckerberg: Do you realize that you jeopardized the entire company? Do you realize that your actions could have permanently destroyed everything I've been working on?
- Eduardo Saverin: WE have been working on!
- Mark Zuckerberg: [speaking frantically, almost hysterical] Without money the site can't function. Okay, let me tell you the difference between Facebook and everyone else, we don't crash EVER! If those servers are down for even a day, our entire reputation is irreversibly destroyed! Users are fickle, Friendster has proved that. Even a few people leaving would reverberate through the entire userbase. The users are interconnected, that is the whole point. College kids are online because their friends are online, and if one domino goes, the other dominos go, don't you get that? I am not going back to the Caribbean Night at AEPi!
- Marylin Delpy: The site got twenty-two hundred hits within two hours?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Thousand.
- Marylin Delpy: I'm sorry?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Twenty-two *thousand*.
- Marylin Delpy: [to herself] Wow.
- Mark Zuckerberg: I'm just saying I need to do something substantial in order to get the attention of the clubs.
- Erica Albright: Why?
- Mark Zuckerberg: Because they're exclusive. And fun. And they lead to a better life.
- Erica Albright: Teddy Roosevelt didn't get elected president because he was a member of the Phoenix club.
- Mark Zuckerberg: He was a member of the Porcelain, and yes he did.