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Title: Stan Helsing (2009)
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Edit
Cast
| Cast overview, first billed only: | |||
| Steve Howey | ... | Stan Helsing | |
| Diora Baird | ... | Nadine | |
| Kenan Thompson | ... | Teddy | |
| Desi Lydic | ... | Mia | |
| Leslie Nielsen | ... | Kay | |
 |
Kit Zenga | ... | Orphan |
| Darren Moore | ... | Crazy | |
| Twan Holliday | ... | Pleatherface (as Twan Holiday) | |
| Ben Cotton | ... | Fweddy | |
|
|
Travis MacDonald | ... | Hitcher |
| Lee Tichon | ... | Michael Crier | |
| Ken Kirzinger | ... | Mason | |
|
|
Charles Zuckermann | ... | Needlehead |
| Jeff Gulka | ... | Lucky | |
| Chad Krowchuk | ... | Sully | |
Edit
Plot Summary
|
Add Synopsis
See All (112) »
Storyline
It's Halloween night, and slacker video clerk Stan Helsing along with his insanely sexy ex-girlfriend , best buddy and an exotic dancer/'massage therapist' - detours into a town cursed by the biggest monsters in movie history: Freddy, Jason , Pinhead , Leatherface , Chucky , & Michael Myers. Written by Anonymous
Plot Keywords:
slapstick comedy | striptease | sexual innuendo | woman squeezing another woman's breast | touching breasts |Taglines:
The most feared monsters in cinematic have met their match.Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)
Rated R for crude and sexual content, some drug use and language | See all certifications »Parents Guide:
View content advisory »
Edit
See full technical specs »
Details
Language:
EnglishRelease Date:
25 March 2010 (Russia) See more »Also Known As:
Mega Monster Movie See more »Company Credits
Show more on
IMDbPro »
Technical Specs
Runtime:
| (edited)Color:
ColorAspect Ratio:
1.85 : 1
Edit
Stan Helsing: [picking up a ringing phone] Schlockbuster. Happy Halloween.
[pause]
Stan Helsing: Yeah yeah yeah, we carry porn.
[pause]
Stan Helsing: What do I recommend? Well... "Schindler's Fist", "How Stella Got Her Tube Packed", "Six Degrees of Penatration". This is a good one. "Glad He Ate Her".
[pause]
Stan Helsing: Yeah, yeah, okay. You're welcome, Grandma.
See more »
Did You Know?
Trivia
In China, the film was marketed as the fifth Scary Movie due to the similarity with the franchise. See more »Goofs
When they're tossing the hitchhiker out the back of the van, there's a lot of light behind them, possibly from another car. In the next shot, after the hiker is gone, the light is no longer there. See more »Quotes
[first lines]Stan Helsing: [picking up a ringing phone] Schlockbuster. Happy Halloween.
[pause]
Stan Helsing: Yeah yeah yeah, we carry porn.
[pause]
Stan Helsing: What do I recommend? Well... "Schindler's Fist", "How Stella Got Her Tube Packed", "Six Degrees of Penatration". This is a good one. "Glad He Ate Her".
[pause]
Stan Helsing: Yeah, yeah, okay. You're welcome, Grandma.
See more »
Crazy Credits
Outtakes play throughout the end credits. See more »Frequently Asked Questions
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This is not a movie that you will find ANY enjoyment in and the lack of humor in a spoof shows that the director/producers/actors were just phoning it in to collect a paycheck. Personally, I was embarrassed for Keenan Thompson and Steve Howey. To take this job without reading the script was definitely a wrong move. And to honestly try to incorporate spoofs of horror movies that others have done better is a real crime. If you see this of your own desire, you can't blame anyone when you want to poke your eyes out afterward. If you want to see funny horror, try anything else but this. In fact, try the movies that this one tries to lampoon. But please, don't waste your time or energy on this. Be forewarned - see at your own peril!