Blended (2014) Poster


Adam Sandler: Jim



  • Lauren : You know, I'm curious. With so many possible reasons, which one's the one your wife left you for?

    Jim : Cancer.

    Lauren : [awkward pause]  I'm sorry. I naturally just assumed you were divorced.

    Jim : It's okay. I naturally assumed your husband shot himself, so we're even.

  • Mfana : Look children, the bush pig has lost his parents so it is been cared for by mama and papa lion. Even in nature, there are blended families.

    Jim : That's nice. That's sweet.

    [Shortly there was a mixture of roaring, crunching, and pig squeals as the lions were eating the bush pig off screen. Espn was screaming and everyone was shocked about what they saw] 

    Mfana : I may have misread that situation.

  • Mfana : Mr. Bellyflopolis, the crocodiles are fake!

    [Jim looks at the fake crocodiles around him in the water] 

    Jim : They're fake?

    Mfana : Yes, they're fake!

    Jim : Why would you make them look so realistic?

    Mfana : Well, to scare the baboons away.

    Jim : You just scared a zebra stripe into my underwear!

  • Jim : You know what, Hooters is to good for you. I'll never bring you there again

    Lauren : Oh well then I guess I'll have to get through life without Hooters

    Jim : You've been doing a pretty damn good job so far

    Lauren : [looks at her breasts]  That doesn't make any sense

    Jim : [points at Lauren's breasts]  No they... I didn't realize they were that big

  • Hilary : Hey, dad, I have a personal errand to run and I need to borrow the car.

    Jim : Well, you can't drive without me yet and somebody's got to stay here with your sisters.

    Hilary : Dad, I have a personal errand.

    Jim : What does that even mean? You taking a hit out on somebody?

    Lou : Dad, she's monsterating.

    Jim : What?

    Hilary : I have my period!

    Jim : Oh, I forgot you get those.

  • Jim : Did you have pork chops and... tuna fish... for lunch today?

    Mfana : Yes! I did!

  • Jim : I googled you, and "Closet Queens" came out. Are you a lesbian ?

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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