The Kids Are All Right (2010) User Reviews

The Kids - and this Movie - Aren't All Right

[flickernatic · 6/10 · 23 November 2010]

This is an entertaining movie worth seeing, at times funny, at times moving, but one that fails, frustratingly, to exploit its potential.

Nic and Jules are a lesbian couple, each with a teenage child fathered by the same anonymous sperm donor, Paul. Their children decide to contact their father and he enters, rather awkwardly, in to the family's lives. Nic and Jules' relationship is loving but passionless - they resort to watching gay porn in bed but even this fails to produce a spark - and before long, Jules and Paul become energetic lovers who meet repeatedly to pursue their affair. Paul, who has never settled into a relationship, finds that he has fallen in love with Jules. He also discovers that the children he fathered so anonymously now mean everything to him. He wants to find a way to continue the relationship with his 'kids' and Jules. But, despite the positives he has brought to them, ultimately he is rejected by them all. Nic, Jules and the kids resume their previous lives while Paul is left out in the cold.

The dramatic situation created by Paul's arrival, his affair with Jules and its effects on Nic and the 'kids' is potentially very interesting and worth exploring. Unfortunately, the theme is treated at best half-seriously, as if Hollywood can't cope with this topic without making it into a comedy. The inclusion of several explicit sex scenes is also a distraction which adds nothing to the story. Most disappointing of all is the ending; this seemed a cop-out. Jules is clearly bi-sexual but she suddenly claims that she is all-lesbian; Nic seems barely troubled by Jules's startling lapse; the 'kids' are overly keen to reject Paul; and all this appears to be designed to produce an old-fashioned 'happy ending' in which the lesbian couple and their children return to everyday life as if nothing had happened (what?!) - except Paul, that is, who is told to 'go and find your own family'. Are, then, the 'kids' 'all right'? On the contrary, their parents' antics appear to have left them in a dreadful mess. Maybe we are supposed to take the title ironically.

On the plus side, the acting is generally good, although Mark Ruffalo does too much mumbling and Julianne Moore tends to over-act. The outstanding performance for me was from Mia Wasikowska as the daughter, Joni.

But this would have been a far better, more memorable and thought-provoking movie if it had followed through more courageously. I'm sure Jimmy McGovern would have done it a whole lot better!

One real moment is all it takes to make a film worth something, The Kids Are All Right brings it.

[brielle_jalexa9 · 8/10 · 4 January 2011]

OK, so here is what is going on with The Kids Are All Right. When I think of Lesbian couples the image of the family portrayed by the stars of this movie comes to mind. I live in Kentucky so I don't ever really come into contact with any established lesbian couples, but I remember watching this video in a Sociology class about proposition 8 that featured all of these Kentucky based gay couples whose wholesomeness and nuclear family awesomeness were supposed to convince me that gay people should be allowed to adopt kids. For the record it didn't need to because I'm completely for gay people doing anything they want, but if I was ignorant then I might have been convinced. I mean, the couples were perfect, upstanding members of the community, their kids were involved in sports and clubs and they all just screamed 'It's Okay to be Gay and Have Kids!'.

What I most remember is that the families kind of all had this lingering desperation in their smiles, like were trying harder to be happy than most people because they were aware that other people would be judging them based on their ability to be happy under the scrutiny of social judgment. The family in the movie, Nic (Annette Benning), Jules (Julianne Moore), Lazer(Josh Hutcherson), and Joni (Mia Wasilowska), kind of all have that same desperation lingering around them. The film basically centers around what happens when the tension brought on by that added responsibility is broken by the intrusion of an outsider.

That intruder is Mark Ruffalo. I think the evolution of his character is one of the most interesting parts of the film. When we first meet Mark, he's just so cool. Everybody wants to be like him. Relaxed, carefree, seemingly very open and with an uncanny ability to understand and relate to people. He grows vegetables, doesn't hurt the environment and has sex with YaYa from America's Next Top Model. He seems like the opposite of Nic, the uptight, control freak, who's very traditional and leads a very traditional life despite or in spite of her gay lifestyle. So you think, 'oh, this movie is going to be about an outsider coming into a family and repairing the relationships within it'. Nic will loosen up and the kids will be able to open up to people because someone finally understands them. But unfortunately film hasn't been that neat and tidy since the 1930s. In this film, certain things come into play that switches our perspective and we come to identify more with Nic's character than we really expected. But we share sympathy with every character. At the end, we actually have the most sympathy for Mark, I would say.

This switch was unexpected and I think it makes the film special and more worthy than just a farce about a Lesbian couple and a straight guy. The best films are ones in which our expectations are inverted, I think. A film should be like a beautiful unopened flower. The bud is beautiful and then it opens, changes and becomes even more beautiful because of those changes. I know that sounds all preachy and lame but if you can't be preachy and lame on the internet than where can you?

My favorite parts of the film were where I saw flashes of my own relationships portrayed in situations presented by the characters. The conflict between Nic and Jules, where they love each other, accept each other, but clearly don't always like each other, injects the film with humor while at the same time serving as a painful reminder of how hard it is to settle down. That struggle to just continue to like the people you love is portrayed so poignantly in the little digs Nic pokes at Jules every now and again. The frustration they both feel is palpable. And If you have an overbearing mother like I do, than you know how it looks and feels to be shut down by your mom like Laser and Joni are by theirs. After every unintentionally overbearing comment, I was like 'wow, that was a real moment.' I have to say that I was a little disappointed with Laser's character. I feel like his character was so rich in the beginning, but really died away to almost nothing by the end. Just a few archetypal little brother comments thrown in to remind us that he's still there. I feel this way because we spent a lot of time with his character in the beginning, understanding that he's a fifteen year old boy. He's moody. And he's searching for something to define him outside of his mothers. That's undoubtedly why he is initially so passionate about finding his biological father. But though his relationship with Mark is pivotal, it is not really explored as deeply as is Mark's relationship with Joni. Basically his character was traveling to a destination that it just didn't reach. But this could be intentional. Teenagers are supposed to be mysterious and confusing so maybe it's true to his character to leave him unexplored. However, it did disappoint me. I don't know how this movie is going to do during awards season. I assume it will do well, but more because of the trendy subject manner than due to it's merit as a film. I don't know, the film society just votes that way sometimes. But it moved me and that's worth an award to me.

Making heroes out of the wrong characters!

[Hellmant · 7/10 · 14 October 2010]

'THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT': Three and a Half Stars (Out of Five)

This indie critical darling is one of the best reviewed movies of the year and up until the climax I thought it was a pretty impressive little film. It is a well acted and realistic character study though with the likes of Julianne Moore, Annette Bening, Mark Ruffalo, Josh Hutcherson and 'ALICE IN WONDERLAND's Mia Wasikowska. It's directed and co-written by Lisa Cholodenko and Stuart Blumberg (who also wrote 'KEEPING THE FAITH' and co-wrote 'THE GIRL NEXT DOOR', which I'm a big fan of both). The acting is all impressive, especially Ruffalo and Bening. Moore is good but she's been much better, maybe it's just the character she's playing here that doesn't give her as much to work with. The directing is adequate and fitting to the material and the screenplay is full of natural and believable characters and dialog. Even the ending, which I didn't like, seems believable it's just that it turns the film into a much less valuable learning lesson.

The film tells the story of Joni (Wasikowska) and Laser (Hutcherson) a brother and sister conceived through artificial insemination by their unhappy mothers Nic (Bening) and Jules (Moore). Joni is Nic's biological daughter and Laser is Jule's biological son and they were both conceived from the same sperm donor Paul (Ruffalo). On her eighteenth birthday, when she's legally able to do so without the consent of her mother, Joni contacts her biological father and she and Laser meet him secretly. Later their mothers find out about this and before allowing them to see him again demand to meet him as well. Nic, the controlling working mother, is very upset by the sudden involvement of Paul in her children lives but Jules (who has mostly been a stay at home mom) warms to him after he hires her to design and construct his back yard. Paul is a free spirited, fun loving co-op farmer and restaurant owner. This clashes with Nic but the rest of the family enjoys spending time with him and he really learns to love them as well. Complications arise.

I was really fascinated by all of the characters and learned to really like them, all except for maybe Nic who was just a little to controlling and self righteous (but believable). Paul to me was the most relate-able and likable character and the story and growth of all of the characters kind of revolve around him. Without giving away too much the movie ends in conflict and one of the characters is sort of used and abused and left with a lot of unfair judgment placed upon him. It is realistic and believable though it just seems like the movie is making heroes out of the wrong characters and villains out of others, that don't deserve it. This left me very much disappointed in the movie as a whole and that's why I can't overwhelmingly recommend it.

Watch our review show 'MOVIE TALK' at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOOi1HDSXyA

I was disappointed.

[lorisuzannedell · 24 July 2011]

I was so looking forward to seeing this movie. I absolutely love both Julianne Moore and Annette Bening. They are two of my all time favorite actresses. I also love Mark Ruffalo and being a bisexual woman I was really looking forward to a family movie with two women raising their children. That being said...

I was really disappointed that the film maker couldn't just make this a story about two women, married to each other, struggling to raise a family and be married, through all of the struggles that are already in place for so many married couples.

What was so disappointing was the constant infusion of male sexuality throughout these women's marriage. The Gay Male Sex videos, the affair with the sperm donor, and the constant subliminal reminder that a man is necessary in a woman's relationship.

And Julianne Moore's reaction to being penetrated by Ruffalo was insulting to all girl on girl relationships.

I think there was a bigger story to be had here and I feel it was glossed over to bring in a male interaction to a female lead family.

I'm sorry it had worked out this way. I had hoped that finally someone would tell an honest and clean story about two women, married to each other, and trying to raise a family and deal with all that comes naturally to any married couple raising a family.

Very disappointing.

On a different note: Both Moore, Bening, and Ruffalo were stellar performers as they always are. Their on screen personalities were original and refreshing. Great acting, however, couldn't save this story for me, it only made watching it a bit more bearable.

The Kids is OK.

[st-shot · 7/10 · 7 August 2011]

Products of same parents different mothers inquisitive teens Joni and Laser seek out their biological father. Paul (Mark Ruffalo) turns out to be a likable laid back vacillator that the kids would like to have more of in their lives. Nic (Annette Benning) a focused doctor is cautious while Jules (Julliane Moore) more free wheeling in the mode of Paul connects with him in more ways than one.

Kids is a basic dramedy of bump in the road marital discord enhanced by the changing make- up of today's nuclear family. The same problems of raising a family and maintaining individual identity within the unit are dealt with here as in any union but with the added dynamic of same gender partners struggling with traditional heterosexual hurdles.

As lovers and parents Moore and Benning are excellent as they display a nice comfortable chemistry with each other, casually defining and revealing the problems in the relationship without hysteria. Opposites in many ways Benning's Nic is rigid but pliable, Moore's Jules free spirited but conflicted; yet they balance each other well as long time companions. Ruffalo's Paul has a nice irresponsible charm at first that allows him to inveigle his way into the family setting momentarily by winning over the kids and Jules as well as a grudging respect from Nic.

Director Lisa Cholodenko maintains a spry enough pace by moving from character to character without bogging down in the superfluous chatter that devoured Laurel Canyon and along with a trio of winning performances to carry it along "The Kids.." is a lot better than all right.

Better than all right

[dfranzen70 · 7/10 · 28 January 2011]

The Kids Are All Right is one of those sweetly sentimental comedies that manages to be funny as well. It's about a decidedly unorthodox family that's far from perfect – and what happens when a so-called interloper arrives on the scene. It's wonderfully acted, with affecting performances by Mark Ruffalo and Julianne Moore, and it's engaging entertainment, no small feat when the subject of touching charm arises.

Nic (Annette Bening) and Jules (Moore) are a married lesbian couple in California with two kids, Laser (Josh Hutcherson) and Joni (Mia Washikowska). Two two kids – one for each mom – are the result of a sperm donor, and when Joni turns 18 she places a call to the sperm bank at her brother's behest. The two wind up meeting Paul (Ruffalo) and hit it off, but when the two moms meet him, they have strikingly different reactions to his arrival.

There's excellent conflict afoot here. The kids resent their moms for being so defensive about their wanting to know about their own biological father; the moms resent the kids for looking into the matter themselves. X is the calm, mediating type; she's outwardly caring and splits her time between raising the two kids and starting new (doomed) businesses. By contrast, Nic is more inwardly insecure, and she compensates by controlling as much as possible of the lives of the other three. No wonder Paul's appearance causes Nic to get her back up.

The movie isn't one of those where increasingly wacky situations occur. It's not a slammed-door comedy. People behave as if you'd expect them to behave, which is nice thing to see in a comedy (rather than exaggeration of gestures and speech, for example). Eventually, it isn't enough that Paul shows up in everyone's lives, disrupting what little harmony they have; something else happens as a result of his appearance that really behaves as the key conflict. And for once, when the culprits are confronted, there is no neatly tied response given by the rest of the family.

Another pleasant aspect of the movie is that it never treats the relationship between Bening and Moore as if it were anything but the most commonplace thing on earth. It's not just that these two woman are married and in love, it's that they're also utterly human – they fight each other convincingly, they get their feelings hurt, and they reconcile with the kind of subtlety you rarely really see in movies these days. Each character, rather than being simply caricatures of what a straight person would assume a gay married couple would look like, has her own striking personality, and the two actresses perform quite well. I think Moore comes off a little better and that Bening's character sometimes seemed a little one dimensional – but this is more likely an oversight on the part of the writer, not the actress. Ironically, it was Bening who received an Oscar nomination for this movie, but I think Moore's work was superior here.

Overall, the script neither flashy nor contrived; situations don't crop up just so we can have a laugh at someone's expense. Well done.

The Kids Are All Right is a genuinely funny movie. It's not a gagfest, and it wasn't meant to be one. The characters are sincere but not always forthright; they all seem to make a bad decision or two in the movie. The cast was well selected (lest I forget, Ruffalo is aces as a laid-back buttinsky, if such a thing can exist), and it's a movie worth seeing.

All Right Is Alright

[NJMoon · 7/10 · 19 December 2010]

The kids are better than all right, they're terrific. So are their lesbian moms, played with insight and skill by Annette Bening and Julianne Moore. Trouble is, the film that surrounds them turns out to be less than compelling stuff despite its topicality. The sperm donor responsible for the family at hand is played by Mark Ruffalo, and although a talented fellow, his character has enough foibles to keep him emotionally distant from the viewer. The story of his introduction to this modern family goes in a couple of directions, but all feel familiar and none satisfactory. Terrific premise, but unfulfilled promise.

Cholodenko's Funny, Mature Look at a Nuclear Family Has Universal Appeal

[EUyeshima · 9/10 · 22 July 2010]

Nora Ephron could take a few cues from Lisa Cholodenko ("Laurel Canyon") on how to write and direct a movie about a recognizable human dilemma and the characters who have to deal with it. Now that I have seen this 2010 dramedy, I feel that this is basically the film that Ephron was trying to make with her 2009 Meryl Streep vehicle, "It's Complicated", a far more conventional comedy that took a long-estranged couple and threw a monkey wrench into their arrangement by introducing a plot device that had them reigniting embers they didn't realize still existed between them. In Cholodenko's film, the situation appears more unique - the long-standing couple, Jules and Nic, is lesbian, and the complicating factor is Paul, the common biological father who provided the sperm that produced their two children, Nic's 18-year-old daughter Joni and Jules' 15-year-old son Laser.

Ironically, however, the treatment here, co-written with Stuart Blumberg, is far more textured and universal here than in Ephron's dependence on tired stereotypes and slapstick. The superb performances don't hurt either. The multi-layered story feels like a series of illuminations about these five characters. It begins when Joni and Laser decide to track down their sperm donor father without consulting their mothers. Paul turns out to be an easygoing, LA-style restaurateur and organic farmer, and as he begins to insinuate himself into the family's life, the director exposes the confused feelings of a family toward someone who's intractably part of them yet a complete stranger. Jules is intrigued, while Nic is suspicious and increasingly angry at someone she views as an interloper. At the same time, Cholodenko focuses attention on how Joni and Laser discover themselves sexually in a gay family with much of the comedy comes at the expense of Nic and Jules, who spice up their sex life with gay porn.

Without resorting to stereotypes, the film succeeds in making this family seem quite ordinary with the kids constantly embarrassed by their moms' emotionalism and need for order. Jules and Nic have a marriage that looks like any straight one of twenty years duration. A certain brittleness has crept into Annette Bening's work of late, although the approach works well in her well-etched portrayal of Nic. She has a particularly strong dinner table scene where she is finally seduced by Paul's laid-back charms, sings a woozy rendition of Joni Mitchell's "All I Want", makes a shocking discovery in the bathroom, and then returns to the table in an engulfing haze of silent disappointment. As Paul, Mark Ruffalo appears to be doing a variation of the ne'er-do-well character he played in "You Can Count on Me" but gives him a shaggy, SoCal veneer of materialistic success.

In a turn that reminds me a bit of "Annie Hall"-circa Diane Keaton, Julianne Moore plays the character that experiences the biggest arc in the story - nurturing and self-reflective one minute, spontaneous and regretful the next. For an actress often at home in period roles that require her to express repression, this feels like her most liberating work. As Joni, Mia Wasikowska - superb in Tim Burton's redux of "Alice in Wonderland" earlier this year - has the coltish manner of a young Gwyneth Paltrow and brings lucidity to her maturing character. Growing up from his cherubic turns in "Little Manhattan" and "The Bridge to Terabithia", Josh Hutcherson appears to be graduating to troubled adolescent roles with ease. Yaya DaCosta is so strikingly beautiful as the girl Paul conveniently keeps at bay that you almost overlook the serene presence she brings to her scenes. Cholodenko has no problem filming graphic lovemaking scenes, and they don't feel gratuitous to the story. It's rare when a film manages to be funny, mature and involving as this one does.

Unconventional Family

[claudio_carvalho · 7/10 · 15 August 2016]

In Los Angeles, the lesbians Jules (Julianne Moore) and Nicole "Nic" (Annette Bening) are mothers of the eighteen year-old Joni Mitchell (Mia Wasikowska) and fifteen year-old Laser (Josh Hutcherson) that have been conceived by the same sperm donor for the artificial insemination. Nic is a doctor; Jules is a housewife graduated in architecture and has just started a gardening business but she is not supported by Nic and has no clients; Joni has joined the college; and Laser is in high-school. Out of the blue, Joni decides to seek out her biological father and she finds Paul (Mark Ruffalo), who is a businessman with a restaurant and a nontrangenic plantation. After the first encounter, they invite Paul to have dinner with their family and Paul hires Jules to transform his back garden. Paul gets close to Joni and Laser and has a love affair with Jules. He falls in love for her, but Jules still loves Nic. Meanwhile Nic feels that she is losing her authority with the children and is jealous of Paul. How will this triangle of love end?

"The Kids Are All Righta" is an original dramatic comedy (or comic drama) about an unconventional family that is deeply affected when the sperm donor is brought to them. The conclusion is realistic and without any concessions. The eternal beauty of Julianne Moore is another attraction of this little film. My vote is seven.

Title (Brazil): "Minhas Mães e Meu Pai" ("My Mothers and My Father")

Mothers

[willandthomas-picturehou · 8/10 · 14 July 2010]

It's unavoidable to compare. We're at the beginning of the world our grandchildren are going to take for granted. But now, we compare and realize that family is by choice or design a place, a state of mind, in which love does or must flourish. Beautifully told with a sensational performance by Annette Bening. Without preaching or candy coating the story we realize that the future has a chance. Two women, one sperm donor and two children. Why not? We see the results on the children's faces. Mia Wasikowska is the daughter. Smart, compassionate, mature beyond her years. Josh Hutcherson is the son and, although he is the least developed character, I loved him, with his lopsided smile and his healthy curiosity. Mark Ruffalo, wonderful, showing us, as the sperm donor, another face of a character he has a monopoly in, the lovable loser. He is terrific! Julianne Moore is still an actress I find very hard to surrender to. Her acting is so much upfront that it takes you out of the truth she's trying to convey. However I loved the film and I only hope Hillary Swank is not nominated next year so Annette Bening finally gets what she so richly deserves.

Mark Ruffalo

[DVK1234 · 6/10 · 2 February 2023]

I like any film with Mark Ruffalo. The acting in this movie was good, story kept my interest. The premise that Mark Ruffalo met a ready made family, decides to settle down, it makes sense. He's still single and all of a sudden he finds that he has two kids.

I don't like the ending because the misstep was made between the kids mom and with Mark Ruffalo. Why is he the only one that gets shut out from his kids' lives?

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Domestic Life in THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT

[seaview1 · 8/10 · 25 February 2011]

The nuclear family takes on a different spin when both parents are same sex and the kids are the product of a male sperm donor in The Kids Are All Right. When traumatic upheaval and revelations strike such a family, the results can be amusing and also tragic. Annette Bening and Julianne Moore highlight an insightful script about domesticity turned on its head.

Nic (Bening) and Jules (Moore) are lesbian parents of two teens, Joni and Laser. One day the children research and contact their biological father, Paul (Mark Ruffalo), who agrees to meet his progeny. After an awkward first meeting, things actually go well as the new family connections are explored by the kids and their newly found father. The couple of Nic and Jules are a contrast; Nic is the physician who is totally controlling while Jules is still trying to find herself with a new business of landscaping. Laser hangs with the wrong crowd and begins to realize that he deserves better through his bond with Paul. Joni is trying to assert herself as an adult and prepares to go to college. The moms show a parental responsibility to watch over their children and want to meet the dad. When Paul hires Jules to do work on his restaurant landscape, the two connect. As Paul's influence begins to overcome the family, Nic feels left out. But there is an attraction between Jules and Paul that leads to a torrid affair, and when Nic discovers the truth, the family is torn apart. Into this mix are two maturing children whose emotions will be tested throughout.

The roles are well acted especially by Benning as a betrayed spouse, and in particular, her scene of revelation about Jules is a marvel of expressiveness and devastating heartbreak. This culminates in a powerful moment with all the principals present at Paul's dinner table. Moore gives solid support and shines in her heartfelt plea to her family near the end. The ensemble is well cast particularly Ruffalo whose almost bystander role is suddenly elevated to catalyst and disruptor of the family's dynamic.

The story has a nice balance of serious tones and comedic elements born out of the situations. The themes work on several levels like ingredients of a zesty recipe: the family chemistry, the couple of Nic and Jules, the kids' developing bond with Paul, Paul and Jules, and shake and mix well. Everyone has needs and wants, and the strongest is a need to belong to a family and the need to connect with another human being whether it be Laser and his friends, Paul and Jules, Paul and his children, and Nic and Jules. Amid the conflicts, no one escapes unscathed. There are no real heroes or villains here, only hard truths about life and relationships.

The fact that two lesbians are having the conflict over infidelity may seem novel on the surface, but it could easily have been a heterosexual couple. In fact the notion of two lesbians virtually disappears as we witness and understand this family unit with its warts and all. It could be any family when you think about it. The fact that both Benning and Moore play their respective spousal roles so convincingly is a testament to their acting skills playing off an excellent script by Stuart Blumberg and Lisa Cholodenko, who also directs. The ending rings true and shows not only how far the relationships have come, but how that foundation, despite some serious challenges, is strong enough to survive. Life moves on, and there is hope for the future.

There are not a lot of loose ends in this story although, toward the end, it would be nice to get a bit more resolution to Ruffalo's character. The film does contains a couple of brief explicit sex scenes without which this would essentially be a PG rated film. There is little to quibble about, and the viewer gets to experience one of the more insightful domestic dramas in recent years.

Well-acted but a bit fake

[the_cinesexual · 6/10 · 26 February 2011]

It's been over 10 years since Lisa Cholodenko directed Ally Sheedy in her career's best performance; however, Kids proves she's still an estimable director of actors. The achievement is less notable here since I already knew Annette Benning was a goddess; and she's wonderful in the little box Cholodenko has put her in. On the other hand, although I like Julianne Moore, in this movie, I thought she came off a bit shrill. There were also moments of fake emotionality — enthusiastically performed moments of fake emotionality, true.

I watched this movie right after finally catching up with the last season of Six Feet Under, a show I used to look forward to watching, usually with my boyfriend. Years later, after having not been in the United States for 8 years, I found I was much less tolerant of the tropes of the "dysfunctional family" as dramatized on television and in movies. In fact, I found myself not wanting to watch those characters at all and came to really want to yell at Ruth/Mrs Fisher who used to be one of my favorite characters.

I thought: If you hate each other so much then why don't you get away from each other? Nate and Brenda? OMG! And WTF? Same deal with David and Keith. Why exactly were they together and what in hell made them think they could raise kids? What social-service agency gave them the go-ahead? I got no pleasure out of any of them, other than that of seeing "old friends" again. And just like the moment after getting together with "friends" from high school, I remembered why I never needed to again.

Kids reminded me of Six Feet Under: A similar sort of dysfunctional family's bitching and sniping at one another, if at a much lower and tolerable pitch. Barely tolerable. Cholodenko, not surprisingly, directed one episode of Six Feet Under. Are there still shows like Six Feet Under on TV in which unpleasant, if complex and interesting, characters make the lives of their loved ones complete hell? There was definitely an ideological itch being scratched which is either no longer there or no longer noticeable in 2011, at least for me.

So, Kids seems a bit "out of time" to me despite its modern marriage. Maybe that's why I had difficulty believing much about the settings and the background stories of any of the characters. Did you believe, or remember even, for longer than a few seconds, that Annette Benning's character was a doctor? Didn't think so. Did I believe that Julianne Moore's could be a landscape designer? That she's reached her age and doesn't know what she wants to do with her life? That Mark Ruffalo's character owns a restaurant and rides a motorcycle (sort of, more or less)? Or, that the latter two really had an affair? Really? Oscar nominee for Best Supporting Actor? WHAT?! Director, please.

The extent I believed anything in this movie depended on the performances and Cholodenko gets some good ones out of everyone except Ruffalo, whose perpetual bemusement mirrored my own. But, it wasn't enough for me and these gaps made even more obvious Cholodenko's lack of skill in all the other areas of filmmaking, not least of which is the ability to structure a narrative to provide more than just moments of thespian skill, however emotional, and to provide an overall consistent tone and to back it all up with a believable world for the characters to live inside.

So, mad props for direction of actors, and a lot of head-scratching and eye-rolls for everything else.

A good setup - which sets up a poor final act

[fire-child · 4/10 · 30 August 2018]

This movie has an interesting premise and ideas - the possible challenges of a long term lesbian marriage in society today; how the children of sperm donors explore or not that part of their genetic heritage, in contrast to their raised heritage; how that exploration would impact on adoptive parenting.

These valuable themes are first presented in sometimes dramatic, and funny and thought provoking ways - even tantalising ways. Then this brilliant setup and potential is completely wasted by implausible and silly plotting in the final quarter of the movie, and deafness to the issues raised.

'Lesbian' has affair with her children's sperm donor - is she then bisexual? How does her partner understand that, and the deeper implications of what has happened? The donor, falling in love as part of their affair (which he clearly does): this, and his growing relationship with his children changing his sense of commitment to other people - how has this happened to him, and why? The children growing closer to their donor dad, not just to their long term moms - how do they balance and make sense of the love their donor dad is developing, and has developed, for their biological mom now?

Great questions - and they are totally steamrollered and ignored at the end. Moms simply go into total denial about what happened, and all of these questions - and simply eject donor dad with anger from their lives (as well as the lives of their kids). Its all smiles and laughter again with everybody, like nothing happened. It feels like a total cheat, betrayal and cop out from the writers - and it is. The writers evidently like heterosexual man bashing, because that's what happens at the end, as you'll see. And critically - not a thought in the script is voiced for the long mental wellbeing of the children, in suddenly being made to separate from their new father - who is clearly pining to see them, and they him.

There's obvious signs within the movie (that only the most thick headed won't pick up), that the children will be deeply troubled in their lives as a result of this separation - and their moms couldn't care less.

Only if a sequel comes out addressing properly the fallout from what happened, and these questions, could this movie ever be considered great. If it really is a two parter in disguise, I'll revise my review in future. As it is now, its a huge disappointment thematically, and by ignoring the issues highlighted, may even reinforce dangerous stereotypes, like 'lesbians are secretly straight, the right man just has to come along to f#!k them' ; and 'children don't need fathers, they're really just a bad influence deep down'

The Academy should have been ashamed in nominating this film for anything. Maybe they were happy it reinforced these stereotypes. Worrying, if that's the case. Avoid.

Gets four stars only for the quality of the questions it first provoked.

Great.

[oddity94 · 30 May 2010]

The movie follows a Nic and Jules, a middle-aged couple raising their two teenage children, Joni and Laser in suburban L.A. And everything seems to be going just fine until the moment Joni turns 18 and is convinced by her brother to reach out to their biological father. Hesitating at first, Joni eventually puts in a call to the sperm bank, who puts her in touch with Paul, a restaurant owner and all around "cool dude" who seems willing to meet the kids he never knew he had. As Paul arrives in their lives the family is thrown into disarray and sticky situations that threatens the stability of this already unusual family.

The Good: The acting is great with good chemistry between Nic and Jules. Well what else would you expect of Annette Benning and Julianne Moore and not to forget, Mark Ruffalo. And the younger actors (Mia Wasikowska and Josh Hutcherson) give believable and very good performances.

Also the films is very energetic and never really looses your attention.

The Bad: The Films stumbles around a bit not really knowing if it's a romantic comedy or a a family drama specially at the end but fortunately stays true to its core.

Well Acted but sadly written for LGBT community

[bdocili · 6/10 · 30 December 2010]

Quick review. No major spoilers, but I might be giving away bits of it, but nothing major or about the ending.

Interesting movie. I don't know if we really enjoyed it, but an interesting character study. Two observations: 1.) I feel bad for the Lesbian community in that they finally get a well made mainstream movie with smart and somewhat strong Lesbian characters just to have one of the characters decide to hook up with a man. Give me a break. While there are plenty of bi-sexual people out there....Lesbians who are married and raising children usually do not just "need some man" to fix their problems. That was a cop out. Find another issue. The homophobes (who would not watch this movie anyways) are just going to think that all Lesbians just need a man to cure them. Sure.....

2.) Mark Ruffalo is great. He plays the most narcissistic, selfish, self-important (yes, I know these words are basically synonyms, but I am doing so for emphasis) jerk I have seen in a while. I cannot believe that anyone would act like this and just try to destroy a family while pretending to have good intentions. Wow! Anyways, worth seeing, but disappointing in some ways.

Oddly Dissatisfying

[Hitchcoc · 7/10 · 24 May 2012]

I didn't think this was terrible, but I just couldn't get engaged. I felt that a writer said to him or herself, "Let's see. We'll take a lesbian couple who have a couple kids. An anonymous sperm doner. Make the kids curious about their roots. Have the sperm doner be a free spirit kind of guy. Pull the group together and see what happens. When it happens, I just don't care. I had a little trouble with the relationship that developed. It was too quick and too pat. Granted, there were symptoms of disarray, but still. Maybe another woman. Yes, I do know what bisexuals are, but we aren't given enough to know this is an issue. I suppose on a basic level of a lashing out against ennui would work. Anyway, I just felt uncomfortable and never got into it.

Good Acting, But Not Exactly Likable

[3xHCCH · 6/10 · 15 January 2011]

In all awards seasons, there is that one family film that comes up for awards consideration. This year, it is "The Kids are Alright." And yes, like "Kramer vs. Kramer", "Ordinary People" and "American Beauty" before it, it depicts a dysfunctional family, again. Of course, the flawed members of the family make for award-winning angsty moments, but it can be hard to watch.

The family consists of two lesbian mothers, the control freak doctor Nic (Annette Bening) and the luckless stay-in mom Jules (Julianne Moore). They each bore her own child, Joni (Mia Wasikowska) and Laser (Josh Hutcherson), with sperm from the same donor. In a curious move, that was unfortunately not discussed in detail, the kids sought out their biological father, Paul (Mark Ruffalo). From there, obviously, cracks begin to appear in their perfectly unconventional family as Paul integrates himself into their lives.

The actors were all very good. Annette Bening and Julianne Moore are both being cited as Best Actress nominees. They did have their own shining moments. Even if Annette is being given more awards attention, for me I liked the performance of Julianne more. Mark Ruffalo was very natural as the likable "new" dad figure. The way his charismatic character was developed though is disappointing. The actors playing the kids were also good, though they were sulking most of the time.

I do not know why this movie was nominated in the Golden Globe as a comedy. It is most certainly is NOT one, so it created some false expectations. I must also say though that watching the frank sex scenes (lesbian and otherwise) will not comfortable for everybody. I did not really expect to like it, and yes, it is not exactly likable in a sense, because of the distorted sense of morality being shown.

Entertaining story, even when not "in" for a feel-good comedy. Moving from time to time

[JvH48 · 8/10 · 28 December 2010]

The theater announced this movie as a feel-good comedy, which did me hesitate a bit before buying tickets. When before the TV at home, such comedies make me cringe mostly, due to over-acted family ties and an emphasis on life events that should bind people together (but not always do). However, the synopsis of this film sounded intriguing. Also, the reviews on IMDb contradicted each other heavily. The latter decided for me.

Neither the family situation nor the line of events will match everyday's and everyone's family life. But the deviation from a standard family carries the story throughout the movie, and makes up the basic ingredients for the dramatic part. I disagree with many reviewers, who have serious problems with the logic in the story. They seem to think that there is only black and white in sexual preferences, and no gray areas in between that one could try for a shorter or longer period.

The casting is convincing, and the actors are performing very well. The composition of the story is such that there is never a dull moment, and there is always some unexpected event around the corner for our entertainment.

Three sex scenes are included in the film, and one could argue that these could have been more implicit, to make it suitable for family viewing and still drive the message home what happened and what it entails for the story. On the other hand, what is actually shown on the screen is not worse than what one can stumble upon during Internet browsing or home watching TV.

The only problem I had with the story that it has a happy ending for most of the main characters, but not all. I have pity with the ones who were left more or less empty handed. They would have deserved it if they had behaved badly in some sense, but they certainly were not.

I saw this film as part of the "Deventer humor festival 2010" (Deventer is a medium sized village in The Netherlands). I don't think it had its place there, as the movie is much more dramatic than it is hilarious. I can only assume that the festival programmer had other reasons to make it part of this event. Nevertheless I have no complaints about having seen this movie, all things considered.

Excellent Acting with an "alright" story

[mamadunn09 · 7/10 · 3 August 2010]

I saw the movie last night and can honestly say I enjoyed it. I had a lot on my mind, but the engrossing acting and the interesting story kept me hooked, but it still wasn't what it could have been. Many of the characters were poorly developed and there were some minor plots that were also undeveloped. I came out of the theater realizing that if the movie hadn't had the phenomenal actors in it, it would have been nothing above mediocre, but Annette Benning, Julianne Moore, and Mark Ruffalo kept it interesting.

With all the critics raving, I was a little disappointed. It's not as funny as I expected, but still had some cute parts. It's not really a "feel-good" film either. However, the quirkiness of the film, and the acting makes it worth a watch and it's definitely still better than some of the trash out there.

A Creative Twist on an Old Routine

[jrcj41 · 8/10 · 5 April 2011]

It is easy to reinvent the wheel. Throughout the past few decades the cinema has proved this fact with countless low-budget comedies by exploiting the structure of the classical American family. Yet, Lisa Cholodenko's 2010 film The Kids Are All Right offers something refreshingly new; but what? Is it the bohemian lifestyle of a middle- aged sperm donor? Or maybe it's the impulsive decisions of a lesbian landscaper. As one can imagine, this is no typical family.

Annette Bening and Julianne Moore costar as Nic and Jules Allgood, proud homosexual partners and co-mothers of Joni (Mia Wasikowska) and Laser (Josh Hutcherson) by way of artificial insemination. With maturity comes curiosity, and when the children seek their paternity they come face to face with sperm donor Paul Hatfield (Mark Ruffalo). Paul connects immediately with the children but his liberal ways threaten Nic's control and an affair with Jules tears the family to pieces. With Joni off to college at the end of the summer this unconventional group must relearn to trust and love one another in the face of their own familial defeat.

If there is one area of production that deserves special recognition here it is certainly the original screenplay by Lisa Cholodenko. A dynamic and comedic mix of highs and lows, Cholodenko exposes the raw nature and beauty of a family in crisis and leaves the audience with the perfect blend of closure and ambiguity. It is almost unthinkable that The Kids Are All Right did not take the Best Original Screenplay Oscar at the 83rd Academy Awards. I say this not to take credit from The King's Speech, but how many Oscars can you carry at once, Tom Hooper?

Passionate star support says a lot about a story, and The Kids Are All Right may not have gotten off the ground if it had not been for the support of Bening, Moore and Ruffalo, all three of whom had been attached to this little project upon reading the script. Shot in Los Angeles in just twenty three days, The Kids Are All Right is an unconventional portrait of an unconventional family.

Great cast but a slightly disappointing movie

[TheLittleSongbird · 7/10 · 2 October 2011]

To me, The Kids Are All Right seemed like an interesting movie that I was all for seeing. I will not deny that the cast are great. Mark Ruffalo and Julianne Moore are very good, likewise with Mia Wasikowska, however Annette Bening is outstanding. The film looks good, is well directed, has an agreeable soundtrack and the script is funny, mature and acerbic. The characters are the sort of characters that you learn to care for, but to start with apart from Bening's I took time warming to them. The film drags a bit at times, but while I liked the conflict between Jules and Nic some elements of the story falls flat, particularly with the treatment of Paul and the business with the biological dad was an interesting plot point to work from but for me explored poorly. Overall, slightly disappointing but great. The cast are the best asset. 7/10 Bethany Cox

Love Minus Freakshow

[rhinocerosfive-1 · 8/10 · 9 July 2010]

Simple, quiet, true, and lovely - really? A new American movie, not terribly stylized, with a mostly unobtrusive director and a primary cast over 45? And not boring, and just a bit sappy? Huh. I didn't see "High Art". I didn't finish "Laurel Canyon". But I didn't want "The Kids Are All Right" to end. After this one, Lisa Cholodenko is aces with me.

A story's a story as long as it feels like one. I watched this movie with tears in my wide eyes, cared about everybody, couldn't find a bad guy, didn't want one. Plot? Yes. Plot points? Not so much. It plays like life, which is less about notable moments of beat change than a subtle ebb and flow of regression and renewal. In fact this movie is least effective, strains credibility most, when it reaches for conventional action.

So, okay, the third act's a little facile; nobody gets in real trouble, nothing costs enough. I love it anyway. Beautiful performances in an intelligent, well-directed script: this is why more women should make movies: because they don't yell all the goddamn time. Real life contains violence, insanity, and inconsiderate behavior, but there are degrees, man. This movie reflects enough variety in its mirror-up-to-nature, as 'twere, to overwhelm the same old sturm und drang of the last few Jason Reitman, Rob Reiner or Sam Mendes bores. Nobody has to die, nobody has to crash a car or break a bottle or spit out bad jokes like sunflower seeds just to tell a story. Drama's where you find it. A family provides plenty; most people don't survive their own.

Not enough can be said about the five principals either. Performers like these can sell on-the-nose dialogue (it's often better than that) as if it's Shakespeare, and they do. As my buddy Dmitry's always said, Annette Bening is excellent as long as she doesn't have to play a sympathetic character. Mark Ruffalo doesn't make mistakes; Julianne Moore has forgotten the meaning of the word. And these kids are more like real kids than any I've seen in a movie since "Donnie Darko", which is my highest praise for teenage verisimilitude.

See this movie, take your children, your spouse, your potential other. If you don't recognize yourselves in there somewhere, check your pulse.

Came on with a Bang

[wisewebwoman · 7/10 · 17 February 2011]

And went out with a whimper. Unfortunate in a film where a controversial (at least in America) subject matter is presented.

The film is about a family, but a family with a twist as it is headed by a long married lesbian couple with two children from the same sperm donor. The performances by all are exceptionally good considering the limp script which meanders from focus to focus, from the son in search of a male father figure to the daughter who blossoms under the tutelage of the 'father' to the mother who proceeds to have an affair with said sperm donor to the other mother who balks and rages.

Too many confusing viewpoints in one film.

Annette Bening and Julianne Moore shine in this, working wonders with their lines. Mark Ruffalo is well cast also but at times his dialogues was buried, whether through poor sound quality or poor enunciation.

There is one outstanding scene with Bening at the dinner table where she slowly warms up to Paul's (Mark Ruffalo) character and starts to sing a Joni Mitchell number and they click. And then she goes to the bathroom and discovers a long hair of Jules' in the drain and she realizes what is going on. She comes back to the dinner table in an anguished fog, one can hear the blood thumping in her ears. She conveys all her skill as a consummate actress in that moment.

Mia Wasikowska, playing Joni, is splendid in a role that doesn't give her much to work with but she manages to portray a feistiness and vulnerability that was moving.

The script left a lot to be desired and it seemed like the writer(s) didn't know what to do with it either. They discarded one major character without a whimper and left us, the viewers, in a grey limbo.

And those gratuitous sex scenes? Less would have been a whole lot more. Added to a better script.

7 out of 10 for the actors.

Wasted Potential

[tex-42 · 5/10 · 19 December 2010]

Much like one character says to another in this film, they just hate seeing wasted potential. The Kids Are All Right is a movie saved only by the acting. The storyline is clunky and at times nonsensical, and you get the sense after finishing the movie that a lot has been missed without any proper kind of resolution.

To start with the good: Julianne Moore and Annette Bening own their roles. They take what could easily be two poorly developed characters and make them a lot more human than the script calls for them to be. The actors playing the children also shine as they experience the hurt that can be caused when you make life-changing decisions haphazardly.

Sadly, the bad is plenty in this film. What could be an interesting storyline, children of a lesbian couple finding their biological father and attempting a relationship with him while their mothers' relationship goes through a rough patch quickly descends into weird melodrama that is resolved in the most unsatisfactory way possible. Oddly, the biological father is the one who ends up being punished the most seriously, despite the fact he was not the one who initiated the whole thing, and his bad acts are more than matched by those of the other characters.

In short, I would say to give this movie a viewing, but merely for the acting. That should keep anyone watching from expecting too much.