Four troubled orphans from four separate movie scenarios who are bound together in a wacky chocolate factory after receiving golden tickets to go on an 'epic adventure.' After they escape from the clutches of a very scary Willy Wonka they discover the magical world of 'Gnarnia' through an enchanted wardrobe. There they must seek the help of a randy lion, a hoard of mutants from the x academy, students of witchcraft and wizardry, funky swash-buckling pirates and a mischievous beaver to defeat the evil white bitch!Written by
When Mr. Tumnus tells Lucy about the negative effects of the White Bitch's reign in Gnarnia, he says that under her leadership they have had two major wars, government surveillance of the people, and no gay marriage, as a Kanye West stand-in says "The White Bitch doesn't care about black people." This reflected the second term of then-President George W. Bush via his policy decisions for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and a NSA warrantless surveillance program, along with many states and judicial authorities refusing to make same-sex marriages legal (while this wasn't a strict policy decision, as legal proceedings that ultimately led the U.S. Supreme Court to make same-sex marriages legal for the entire country were led by private citizens and were ongoing at the time of this film, the Administration did not support these efforts in any way). The Kanye West reference comes from the superstar musician saying that President Bush didn't care about black people because of the incompetent Federal response to the devastation caused by Hurricane Katrina in 2005. See more »
(at around 25 mins) When Mr. Tumnus shows his crib, he says, "Look! My Plasma!", but the TV is clearly a Sharp, which only has LCD models. See more »
This is the story of four orphans brought together by fate. They didn't know it yet, but there was something more greater in store for them, something epic.
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As the credits roll, there are some scenes, including: more of the Museum Curator dancing, a Mel Gibson look-a-like in prison with Edward, Willy's workers singing, etc. See more »
An extended, unrated version was released on DVD. This version also includes alternate uncensored versions of scenes that were toned down for the PG-13 rating (such as the "Snakes on a Plane" parody). See more »
Bring 4th Ya Booty
Written by Storey, Gilden, Destouche and Destouche
Performed by 10 Sui & La Resistance featuring The Ragga Twins
Courtesy of New State Entertainment See more »
This thing won't let me vote below a 1....
After watching this movie, I just couldn't stop talking about it. Mind you, not in the sense that someone can't stop talking about a great book or show, but more along the line of how someone can't stop talking about their colonoscopy during a diner conversation. In other words, after seeing this you can't help but try and remove the stain it left on your very soul by vomiting out the experience onto others.
This movie entered with the tag line of being "written by two of the six writers of 'Scary Movie'!" What they forgot to mention is that the two who wrote it were only responsible for writing the credits and all the jokes deleted for the sake of not causing mass suicide. Put more delicately, this movie almost makes Pootie Tang look Oscar worthy, which ironically enough was made fun of in the last Scary Movie for being horrid. Coincidence? Yeah, not even some sort of Karma dealing fiend would wish this movie upon the world.
"So," you ask, "What makes it so bad?" I bet your thinking that all of the funny stuff was in the previews, right? No, actually there was no funny content in the previews at all, it just seemed that way when taken out of the context of the movie. Much the same way "Hogan's Heroes" was funny to people who weren't in Auschwitz during the Holocaust, the previews are funny to those who haven't seen the movie. When you actually see the movie, you start to ask, "Why was that funny in the preview?" The answer: You can see pretty flowers if you ignore the fact that they are growing from the corpse of a man who died during a freak green house accident.
Do yourself a favor, rent a History channel documentary on the history of documentaries and hit yourself in the head with a hammer. It'll be twice as funny, make three times more sense, and be only a fifth as painful.
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