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Title: The Mysteries of Pittsburgh (2008)
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| Cast overview, first billed only: | |||
| Jon Foster | ... | Art Bechstein | |
| Peter Sarsgaard | ... | Cleveland Arning | |
| Sienna Miller | ... | Jane Bellwether | |
| Nick Nolte | ... | Joe Bechstein | |
| Mena Suvari | ... | Phlox Lombardi | |
| Omid Abtahi | ... | Mohammed | |
| Keith Michael Gregory | ... | Keith | |
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Ali Reed | ... | Female Book Barn Employee |
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James A. Harper | ... | Teen Book Barn Employee |
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Don Wadsworth | ... | Class Instructor |
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Christian Hand | ... | Punk Rock Bathroom Patron |
| Jarid Faubel | ... | Mohawk Man (as Jarid C. Faubel) | |
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Tim Hartman | ... | Restaurant Manager |
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Shannon Williams | ... | Lurch |
| Seth Adams | ... | Feldman | |
Pittsburgh, coming of age in the 1980s. At the beginning of June, Art Beckstein calls this the last summer of his life - after which he'll work as a stock broker. Art's father is the city's mob boss, steering Art's life, judging his choices. At a party, Art sees Jane, smart, blond, lovely. They meet; she has a boyfriend. The next day, Cleveland, the boyfriend, pulls Art from work and the summer of adventures begins. Cleveland lives close to the edge; he's explosive, with hints of problems with local thugs. The triangle of friendship gets complicated when Cleveland disappears for a couple weeks. Can Art sort out his feelings as well as help Cleveland? Where does his father fit in this? Written by <jhailey@hotmail.com>
A friend of mine gave me this movie. A friend of mine is now in a hospital were a team of doctors are trying to surgically remove a DVD casing from his ***.
I got quit excited by the prospects of an other Michael Chabon movie. After all his novels have brought me much entertainment and previous screenplay adaptations were great, but boy, was I wrong.
First off the people that did the casting must have been asleep whilst doing so. I imagine the castings went something like this. "Tell me, do you like fish?" "Yes I enjoy fish very much." "Wonder full, you're hired. Have some money."
Than there is the script. I have read Chabon, who I hope went blind before he could see this piece of dong, and it has absolutely nothing to do with his novel. I'm not quit sure why it annoyed me like it did, but it might have something to do with the fact that listening to a speech impaired 90 year old drunk duck hunter with a right cranial lobe dysfunction would have been a treat in comparison to the one-liners these 2nd degree model massacre kids spat out.
This is an actual line from the movie; "If you tell me something that you've never said out loud to anyone before, than this moment becomes unique!" Unique? Does it? Does it really? Off course not you plank. Please pass me the Imodium. I'll have a whole ****ing strip.
The directing is... well. I've got nothing. Maybe Rawson Marshall Thurber just got word his grandmother exploded or something. Stick to directing comedies. No stick to directing commercials.
This movie is so horrible it left me banging my head against a wall so hard it brought me back to the stone age. I give it 2 stars because I don't wanna be the guy that watched a 1 star movie.