Principal Skinner: Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, we have transcended incorrigible. I don't think suspension or expulsion will do the trick. I think it behooves us all to consider... deportation.
Marge Simpson: Deportation? You mean kick Bart out of the country?
Homer Simpson: Hear him out, Marge.
[Marge and Lisa come home, and find Homer lying on his back, unable to move]
Marge Simpson: Homer! What happened?
Homer Simpson: The boy... bring me the boy.
Homer Simpson: Wait a minute, Skinner! How do we know some principal in France isn't pulling the same scam you are?
Principal Skinner: Well, for one thing you wouldn't be getting a French boy. You would be getting an Albanian.
Homer Simpson: You mean all-white with pink eyes?
Bart Simpson: So, basically I met one nice French person.
Marge Simpson: Homer, I'd love a glass of that wine Bart brought us.
Homer Simpson: [grunting] Sorry, Marge. Some wiseguy stuck a cork in the bottle.
Bart Simpson: Oh, mon pere. Quel boufou!
[translated, "My father. What a buffoon!"]
Homer Simpson: You hear that, Marge? My boy speaks French!
Principal Skinner: The disturbing incident I was referring to happened this morning, when your sun flushed an explosive device down the boys' lavatory.
Homer Simpson: Heh heh, that old gag.
[while cleaning his room, a box rattles]
Bart Simpson: Hello... what have we here?
[opens the box]
Bart Simpson: [gasp] A cherry bomb! I thought I blew all you guys up!
Bart Simpson: Ah, the life of a frog. That's the life for me.
[Bart has found a cherry bomb]
Milhouse Van Houten: So you're gonna flush it?
Bart Simpson: What can I say? I got a weakness for the classics.
Homer Simpson: He makes me crazy twelve months of the year. At least you get the summer off.
[to Skinner about Bart]