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"Married with Children" T*R*A*S*H (TV Episode 1997) Poster

(TV Series)

(1997)

Quotes

Griff: Al, if I don't make it, would you look up my ex-wife and...

Al: Tell her that you love her?

Griff: No. Tell her she's a bitch!

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Griff: Well Al, I think it's time we hit the hay.

Al: Go to sleep? It's only nine o'clock. What are you? Old?

Griff: Yeah.

Al: [beat] Me too.

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Griff: Oww! This bunk mattress is hard, and this pillow is all lumpy.

Al: At least it doesn't have red hair and begs for sex.

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Drill Instructor: Am I disturbing you, private?

Al: It's Al Bundy.

Drill Instructor: Al Bundy, "sir"!

Al: Well... nobody's called me sir in a long, long time.

Drill Instructor: [shouting] How about moron? They've called you that haven't they?

Al: Sir, yes, sir!

Drill Instructor: Al Bundy, ladies shoe salesman. Well, High Heels, you're in the reserve now. You're not in some candy-ass mall.

Al: You haven't seen my customers. Every day it's the battle of the bulge, sir!

Drill Instructor: Drop and give me 50, mall scum!

Al: I don't have a 50-dollar bill. All I got is this five.

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Kelly: Oh, no, Daddy's going away again? Now, this time he's joined the Post Office.

Al: Don't worry, pumpkin, Daddy's not going to any place as dangerous as that.

Bud: Kel, I thought you of all people would recognize a man in a military uniform.

Kelly: This is what they look like ON? Oh my God. That's so cute.

Al: Honey, you shouldn't say things like that to Daddy after he's just been trained to use a gun.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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