M*A*S*H (1972–1983)
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A clerical error results in an unexpected payday windfall for Hawkeye and the ire of a zealous payroll clerk.



(as Regier), (as Markowitz) | 1 more credit »

On Disc

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Episode credited cast:
... Capt. Benjamin Franklin 'Hawkeye' Pierce
... Capt. 'Trapper John' McIntyre
... Lt. Col. Henry Blake
... Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan
... Maj. Frank Burns
... Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly
... Kim Chung Quoc
... Cpl. Maxwell Q. Klinger
... Capt. Sloan
... Father Francis Mulcahy
... Lt. Baker, RN
... Pvt. Igor Straminsky
... Sgt. Zelmo Zale
Rest of cast listed alphabetically:
Patricia Marshall ... Lt. Nelson


In the Army's infinite wisdom, Hawkeye is named Payroll Officer for the enlisted men at the 4077 and Radar pays the officers. Hawkeye has $10 left from the enlisted pay; Radar looks at the scrip like he is facing a firing squad. All Hawkeye wants is to nibble on a giggly nurse; Radar keeps coming at him with paperwork and dire predictions. Hawkeye shrugs him away, waxing poetic about what the U.S. Army SHOULD be paying him... unfortunately Radar writes it all down. Most of 4077 sits in a poker game; Trapper loses everything but his charm. In the next pay envelope, Radar smells the firing squad coming closer: $3,000.00 for Hawkeye. So, Hawkeye makes a huge donation to Father and the orphans and tries to continue nibbling. Kim Chun Quoc (Jack Soo) is Korea's Tiffany's on wheels; he sells Frank two strands of pearls: one fake set and one genuine set. Margaret finds out and plays her hand cleverly, never once doubting Frank's rat-finkery. When Captain Sloan, Supervising Acc-Fin comes to ... Written by LA-Lawyer

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis


Comedy | Drama | War





Release Date:

4 March 1975 (USA)  »

Company Credits

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Technical Specs


Sound Mix:

(RCA Photophone Sound Recording)


Aspect Ratio:

1.33 : 1
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Did You Know?


Hawkeye calling Trapper "Ravenal" is a reference to Gaylord Ravenal, a riverboat gambler who falls in love with the captain's daughter Magnolia "Nolie" Hawks in the movie Show Boat (1951). See more »


When the peddler, Quoc, tries to sell his 'real' pearl necklaces, he says that the oysters worked for a year to produce the set he had. To generate pearls of that size, oysters incubate them for several years at least. In addition, matched strands of pearls are rarely ever completed in one cycle, but may take as much as ten years to acquire enough pearls of the same color and size for a necklace. See more »


Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre: [Frank is sneaking from behind the showers] Leave your duck in the shower, Frank?
Maj. Frank Burns: Oh, scram-skee!
Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre: Pervert! Fork over 75 bucks, or I'll tell the A.M.A.
Maj. Frank Burns: You wouldn't! You're bluffing.
Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre: How could you tell?
See more »


References Boys Town (1938) See more »


Music by Lionel Newman
Plays in the Officers' Club
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User Reviews

The Stain of Disdain
8 March 2015 | by See all my reviews

It's Hawkeye's turn as paymaster. He fulfills his obligation with his usual panache, complaining about his lost practice. Radar does something and Hawkeye gets a bag with 3000 dollars in it. It makes him nervous, so he gives it to Mulcahy for the orphans. Unfortunately, someone from army finance shows up and wants it back. The other plots are Frank buying some cheap pearls for Margaret and some expensive ones for his wife. She becomes aware and plots revenge. There is also a poker game. One thing that is interesting is the stakes of these games. No limits, bets of 20 and 50 dollars. These people barely get paid. It doesn't even seem realistic.

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