Ross: [talking about the baby's surname] Wait a minute, why is she in the title?
Susan: Because it's my baby, too.
Ross: That's funny, I don't remember you making any sperm!
Barry Farber: About a month ago, I wanted to hurt you more than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life - and I'm an orthodontist.
Ross: Hey, this people are pros, they know what they're doing, they take their time, they get the job done
Judy Geller: [about Rachel] Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar.
Monica Geller: What's that supposed to mean?
Judy Geller: Nothing. It's an expression.
Monica Geller: No, it's not.
Jack Geller: Don't listen to your mother. You're independent and you always have been. Even when you were a kid, and you were chubby and you had no friends, you were just fine! And your'd read alone in your room, and your puzzles...
Jack Geller: There are people, like Ross, who need to shoot for the stars, with his museum and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are. I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer. They're happy with what they have, they're basically content, like... cows.