A diamond is forever, or perhaps a couple of hours
"If I Were a Rich Man" finds Chico ready to pop the question to sweetheart Marilyn Simmons (Liberty Williams), having bought her an engagement ring, its lengthy payments proving that diamonds are forever. As expected, Ed isn't keen on the idea: "do you know what the number one cause of divorce in America is? Marriage!" Marilyn turns him down but can't bring herself to tell him, while Ed and Louie try to get Mando (Isaac Ruiz, fourth of seven) to spill the beans, but his reaction is a predictable Chico phrase: "it's not my job man!" Chico actually hears the bad news from Marilyn, who admits that she's looking for a man like a doctor or lawyer, unwilling to wait 20 years to achieve success.
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