Tobias Fünke : [auditioning] Hello, my name is Dr. Tobias Funke. I graduated with honors from Boston College and I did my post-graduate in psycho-linguistics at MIT. And this is "You're A Bad, Bad, Man" from "Annie Get Your Gun."
Tobias Fünke : Somebody is a Rude Gus. That's all.
Tobias Fünke : I'm alright, gang. What an adventure gang. I thought that the homosexuals were pirates, but it turns out most of them were actors in the local theater. You're right, though. It is amazing, I've been waiting for the universe to provide a path for me... And I think it has...
Lindsay Funke : You're gay?
Tobias Fünke : No. No... Ha, I'm not gay. How many times must we have this conversation?