Officer Brinkman: Tell him to put his hands up.
Ali G: [over the loudspeaker] Yo! Yo, mofo! Put up your 'ands, or you is gonna be shot by us!
Officer Brinkman: OK, tell him you see the gun.
Ali G: I can see the motherfucking gun. Put them up!
Officer Brinkman: You can't curse, you can't curse.
Ali G: You can't curse!
Ali G: What is legal?
Richard Thornburgh: Well, I think most conduct that all of us engage in on a day-to-day basis is legal.
Ali G: So what is illegal?
Richard Thornburgh: What is illegal is what the elected representatives of the people define as crimes.
Ali G: What is barely legal?
Richard Thornburgh: Well, that's when you get into technicalities and that's why you have trials.
Ali G: Cos me saw this film called Barely Legal 3 and it was about these two naughty college girls, and them 'adn't done their 'omework, and then as punishment they had to have a three-header with their supervisor, this teacher. Is that to do with the law?
Richard Thornburgh: Uhhh... It's hard to say. That would probably be governed by the rules of the institution, the college.
Ali G: Yo, well, in this institution it was very strict rule that if you didn't do your 'omework you would get boned.
Richard Thornburgh: Right. Well, that's a law of sorts.
Ali G: Yo. Well, it's a well good law. Has you seen that film?
Richard Thornburgh: Yes - No, I haven't.
Ali G: You should check it out.
Richard Thornburgh: [laughing] I will now because you've recommended it.
Ali G: Yo. I mean, it's well good, it's like...
Richard Thornburgh: Barely Legal?
Ali G: Barely Legal 3.
Richard Thornburgh: 3, OK. Good.
Ali G: There has been enough sadness since the terrible events of 7-11.
Borat: Yagshemash! In U.S. and A., if you want to marry a girl, you cannot just go to her father's house and swap her for 15 gallons of insecticide. Before American woman will allow you in her vazhin, you must do something called dating.
Sgt. Thomas Hyers: And that completes Cop 101 here at the Philadelphia Police Academy. How'd it go, what'd you think?
Ali G: [shaking hands with him] Respect. Do you think I could make a good cop?
Sgt. Thomas Hyers: Er, probably not.
Edwin Meese: [closing soundbite] I was Attorney General, my name is Meese. I say go to college, don't carry a piece.