'Allo 'Allo! (1982–1992)
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The British Are Coming 

World War II is raging, but in the French village of Nouvion, café owner Rene Artois wants only a quiet life, plus some slap and tickle with his waitress Yvette behind his sour wife Edith's... See full summary »


David Croft


Jeremy Lloyd (by), David Croft (by) | 2 more credits »

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Episode complete credited cast:
Gorden Kaye ... René Artois
Richard Marner ... Colonel Kurt von Strohm
Sam Kelly ... Captain Hans Geering
Vicki Michelle ... Yvette Carte-Blanche
Francesca Gonshaw Francesca Gonshaw ... Maria Recamier
Kirsten Cooke ... Michelle Dubois
Jack Haig Jack Haig ... Roger Leclerc
Carmen Silvera ... Edith Artois
Rose Hill Rose Hill ... Madame Fanny
John D. Collins ... Flying Officer Fairfax
Nicholas Frankau ... Flying Officer Carstairs
Guy Siner ... Lieutenant Hubert Gruber
Kim Hartman ... Private Helga Geerhart
Richard Gibson ... Herr Otto Flick
Richard Cottan Richard Cottan ... Claude


World War II is raging, but in the French village of Nouvion, café owner Rene Artois wants only a quiet life, plus some slap and tickle with his waitress Yvette behind his sour wife Edith's back. To this end, he keeps in with two German officers who are regular café patrons, Kurt Von Strohm and Hans Geering. He is therefore alarmed when Michelle of the Resistance declares his house a safe house for two British airmen who have been shot down and who don't speak a word of French. He is also to host Roger Leclerc, a forger and old flame of his mother-in-law Fanny, who was sprung from jail by the Resistance but, due to a misunderstanding, mistakes Hubert Gruber, a German officer who turns out to be gay and fancies René, for the forger. Geering and Von Strohm discover the hidden British airmen, but when Herr Otto Flick of the Gestapo arrives, they agree to help. This is because Flick is after a favourite painting of Hitler's, "The Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies," which they wish to ... Written by don @ minifie-1

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis


Comedy | History | War







Release Date:

30 December 1982 (UK) See more »

Filming Locations:

England, UK

Company Credits

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Technical Specs




Aspect Ratio:

1.37 : 1
See full technical specs »

Did You Know?


[All trivia items for this title are spoilers.] See more »


René: Good evening, Herr Lieutenant. What is your pleasure?
Lt. Hubert Gruber: I would like a cognac, if you please?
René: Maria, cognac for the officer. If you would like to, eh
Lt. Hubert Gruber: Why not, why not?
René: [René puts down the cognac. Lt. Hubert Gruber reaches into his pocket and produces a cigar. René mistakes Lt. Hubert Gruber for Leclerc] I - I - I expect you would like a light?
Lt. Hubert Gruber: Thank you, you're very kind.
René: I have no matches.
Lt. Hubert Gruber: Then why do you ask me if I would like a light?
René: I'm very sorry.
Lt. Hubert Gruber: If you have no matches... if you have no ...
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Spoofs Secret Army: Weekend (1978) See more »


Under the Bridges of Paris
(Sous les Ponts de Paris)
Music by Vincent Scotto
French lyrics by Jean Rodor
English lyrics by Dorcas Cochran
Performed by Jack Haig and Carmen Silvera
See more »

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