Cloris Leachman: Great Gam Gam
Barry Badrinath : I was in Thailand playing ping-pong in Ding Dang. I was in a real high stakes game in some opium den. Turns out the guys I was playing aren't the kind of guys who like to lose. After I beat 'em, they beat me. Worked me over pretty good. And this is hard to say... they held me down and shoved a ping-pong paddle up my ass. It's never been the same. Damaged goods.
Steve "Fink" Finklestein : Gosh, Barry, I'm so sorry. I don't know what I would do if someone shoved a paddle handle up my ass.
Barry Badrinath : It wasn't the handle. I've been shitting pancakes ever since.
Great Gam Gam : Mr. Badrinath... we are not so different, you and I. I've had all kinds of things shoved up my ass. I got over it. You will, too.
[puts a comforting hand on Barry's shoulder]
Great Gam Gam : You will, too.
Great Gam Gam : I always sleep better with a little sausage in me.
Jan Wolfhouse : So what else do the Germans do?
Great Gam Gam : They also practice by drinking the urine of a ram.
Todd Wolfhouse : The - the what?
Great Gam Gam : They drink ram's piss.
Steve "Fink" Finklestein : Because of the pH balance?
Great Gam Gam : No... because if you can drink ram's piss, fuck, you can drink almost anything.
Steve "Fink" Finklestein : She said "fuck."