I finish the Tomb of Terrors box set with the third Bill Zebub film on here. Unfortunately it's easily the worst of his films here and for the most part worthless. It's about an "acid party" and a guy in a lame mask talking endlessly in a pretentious, pseudo-intellectual blasphemous manner to a topless woman wearing an equally lame mask in a basement. His ranting is even more annoying because he has a whiney, stupid voice and you can often see his tongue moving inside it, gross. There's lots of scenes of women "crucified" in the woods while topless of course. The women here are at least decent looking as they always are in a Zebub movie but the nudity is completely unerotic and staring at boobs is great and all but it's rendered almost boring here. Other than boobs the films sole highlight is the soundtrack being eerie ambient with neo-folkish style vocals every now and then. The ending is stupid with a character who has been barely seen confessing to a cop his crimes of tying up the women in the woods trying to avoid the death penalty for potentially killing them. The movie ends soon after this and the viewer realizes they have mostly wasted 75 minutes of precious life.
Being the end of this arduous task (started September 28th) of watching all 50 of the mostly dreadful films from the Tomb of Terrors I'm going to now rank them. Star ratings don't necessarily reflect placement:
The Traveler (****)
Kill Them and Eat Them (***1/2)
Shower of Blood (***1/2)
Strange Things Happen at Sundown (***)
Soul of the Demon (***1/2)
The Slasher (***)
Blood Legend (**1/2)
Cutting Room! (**1/2)
Flesh Eating Ghouls from Outer Space (**1/2)
Terror at Baxter U (**)
Kill the Scream Queen (**1/2)
Granny (**1/2)
Gorno: An American Tragedy (**1/2)
Purvos (**1/2)
Revenge of La Llorona (**)
The Parasite (**)
The Vulture's Eye (**)
Lifeblood (**)
Reanimator Academy (**)
Shadowhunters (**)
So Mort It Be (**)
Siege of Evil (**)
Rose of Death (**)
Rape is a Circle (**)
Bikini Party Massacre (**)
Demon Sex (*1/2)
To Become One (*1/2)
Capture the Flag (*1/2)
The Somnambulists (*1/2)
Redneck County Fever (*)
Nightmare Museum (*1/2)
The Night Owl (*)
From Venus (*)
Skyggen (*)
Three Can Keep a Secret (*)
The Lunar Pack (*)
Barely Legal Lesbian Vampires (*)
The Crucifier (*)
Devil's Moon (1/2*)
Human Behavior (*)
Inexchange (*)
Unborn Sins (1/2*)
Disk Jockey (1/2*)
None Left Standing (1/2*)
Death from Beyond (1/2*)
Sorority Babes in the Dance-A-Thon of Death (1/2*)
Season in Hell (1/2*)
Sleep Disorder (1/2*)
The Abberdine County Conjurer (1/2*)
The Woodland Haunting 2 (1/2*)
Any of the last 5 can be candidates for the worst movie of all time. There's a few hidden gems here like The Traveler, Strange Things Happen at Sundown, Soul of the Demon and Kill Them and Eat Them but for the most part these films are very low budget and intensely mediocre to downright wretched. I only give The Woodland Haunting 2 the bottom spot because it's awful comedy, The Abberdine County Conjurer at least attempts to be a serious (I think) horror but fails miserably with an absurd 135 minutes runtime. The Traveler is the must see here for any low budget splatter fans that don't mind a bit of pretentiousness. Now I just have to dig out the Decrepit Crypt of Nightmares, Mortuary of Madness or Catacomb of Creepshows and start all over again.
