Cyxork 7 (2006) Poster


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Glad this "franchise" is dead
camachoborracho16 July 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Since you can ask your friends' opinions and read reviews about mainstream films most anywhere, I try comment on the smaller, harder to find films which have little written about them (and the few comments you will find are usually cast and crew plugging the film). Hopefully I'll help someone who is debating on whether the effort they might put into finding and seeing a smaller, hard to find film is really worth it.

That said, "Cyxork 7" - a very high concept comedy - fails on every single level. I did not laugh once during the entire film, which is surprising especially since Greg Proops is involved. Dropping the f bomb for emphasis is not funny. Having running commentary in numerous points is not funny. Kicking someone in the balls is not funny unless the setup and payoff is good. For the entire film, the jokes have no setup and what's more, the characters are not only flat and uninteresting, their motivations hardly make any sense.

Like I said, the premise of the film had me interested, which is why I saw it at the Fine Arts Theater in Los Angeles. But the film seems to have an identity crisis of whether it wants to be drama or comedy.

The editing was awful. The scenes drag far, far too long and instead of cutting on a joke or trimming needless scenes (maybe because there are a lot that don't go anywhere), they linger. In particular I think of the scene between the 2 actors who have an affair on the side and the camera pans out for a few seconds then we cut. The actors all seemed uncomfortable with their lines.

Ray Wise does a decent job and plays it straight, but the only problem is so does everyone else. This is a comedy, where things need to be over the top to emphasize the ridiculousness of the concept. Perhaps the best scene is that of the producer, which at least was colorful and he seemed like someone you could hate.

That brings me to another point, there's no sense of tone. The GNN news thing - is it supposed to be serious? Because the 2 anchors swear like sailors as though this were funny, and are very self aware of how cute they are being, which sucks you right out of the humor. (Now it would be much funnier if they played it straight but said absurd things). I mean, you have to ground this in some level of reality. Also, the text full of swears and innuendo was not funny but annoying, and simply repeating what the anchors already had said. Now if they had been established as an alternate news channel MAYBE I could buy it, but even so, it's not so much the credibility as the fact the actors seem to giggle as though they think everything they say is hilarious.

As for the plot, so many loose threads never come to fruition: the lesbian story between the news correspondent (why is she there again?) and the cam operator - I guess it's funny because they're lesbians? The nerd who is taping the behind the scenes footage and trying to direct his girlfriend act never makes sense - I thought maybe he would use the footage as blackmail, or to show he's a better director, or perhaps he & everyone else who wants to direct would create a bunch of competing directors, but nope I was wrong, this goes nowhere and just seems like a lazy cutaway to bad quality video. The pregnant actor's wife who held everyone hostage and then everything's hunky dory?

I understand this was low budget which is fine but it's not funny. I actually would have been happier to see more physical comedy which would have lightened the tone instead of everyone being so serious. Oh yes, why would nobody on the crew leave instead of risk their lives? Do they want to break in that bad? (Again, lack of motivation here).

The one saving grace was the idea of actors killing themselves to boost their careers. Could have been funny but then it becomes very dark and again the tone is awkward. Not to mention the final "And she died by a cart" post script at the end was out of place.

Pretty much I was left scratching my head. So did they complete the movie or just the shot? What happens to the franchise? To the wife? To everyone else's careers? But by that time, you'll be walking out of the theater or turning off the film because the movie doesn't seem to care and neither should you about seeing this film.

VERDICT: STAY AWAY 2 out of 10 stars
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Scattershot sci-fi spoof
Leofwine_draca12 April 2017
Warning: Spoilers
CYXORK 7 is an occasionally enjoyable spoof of the whole B-movie film-making process, although it's not quite as funny as it thinks it is. The film has a desert setting and follows the misadventures of a film crew as they attempt to shoot a low-rent science fiction movie in an area plagued by earthquakes.

What follows is rather episodic, lifted by an endearing and hilarious turn from underrated star Ray Wise, who you may remember appearing in ROBOCOP as one of the bad guys. His big-headed movie star is a real delight, so it's a pity that the rest of the cast can't match him, although Greg Proops has a fun cameo as a TV news presenter. I found the ending rather random and quite unsatisfying.
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Hilarious and original
casadelsand6 August 2006
When I first saw this movie at FAIF (which it won), I didn't know what to expect. I knew it would be unique when I saw the hilarious, scathing news channel parody. From then on, it made me laugh with unexpected surprises and subversive riffs on the Hollywood theme.

The varied characters and their plights were entertaining, fresh, and painfully recognizable. Ray Wise shone as the consummate capital-A actor. Sonya Smith, the lovely director, was notably sympathetic as she finally found the courage to take charge. Her relationship with the talented Joseph Culp elicited funny and wincing memories of one's own life choices, as the couple decides what to hold onto and what to let go.

Beata Pozniak was hilarious and disturbingly real during her catfight to keep what she earned. Roberto Bacalski's performance as a smarmy producer was cringingly on target. His harshness began an exciting chain reaction, forcing foes to bond and skeptics to believe. Ruthless, incisive, and sympathetic, the dialogue was excellent.

The desert scenery was beautifully rendered and appropriate to the story - what Hollywood would be if it dried up. The sets and costumes were outstanding, especially on a tight budget.

The ending, which I won't spoil, was a hugely fun payoff as excess took root. Though hilarious, it also made you think about what you truly want and the price you'd be willing to pay for it.

I highly recommend this funny, imaginative, and extremely original film.
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A breath of fresh air from studios slump
dtaylor-313 August 2006
Having seen this film several times, including at the FAIF International Film Festival, I am delighted that finally someone has made an independent that shows Hollywood creativity is still alive and well in independent films.

If you go expecting super special effects you'll be disappointed, but if you truly go with a clear mind open to the artistic rendering of great independent cinema you'll be rewarded by this films tones and creativity.

I really enjoyed this film and the actors. Ray Wise was great as always and just seeing Sonya Smith made my heart skip a beat. It may not be for the entire family but it's a great date movie. Go see Cyxork 7 and judge for yourself, you will really enjoy this cinematic master.
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Fun on an earthquake fault-line
jasonbrown20 August 2006
It's a shame you can't say this more often, but every time I've seen this film I've had fun.

I screened 'Cyxork 7' during the programming process for the 2006 Carolina Film & Video Festival and loved it. Too often films that are trying to say something over-think their audience and suck the life out of the genre. John Huff's crazy 'movie-crew on a fault-line' premise contains tons of great commentary on society and movies, but none of that gets in the way of the jokes and characters. I saw over 1,000 films last year (both shorts & features), and Cyxork was one of the top ten experiences I had.

Picking the movie up again nearly a year later, it's still fun. Ray Wise's performance is fantastic and layered (as usual). And I can't say it enough - the movie looks great. Not just acceptable or tolerable or expected for a genre picture. John Huff and Michael Negrin do a great job of making this a visually entertaining movie.

More people should see this film.
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A heroic romp to the epicenter of satire
CarolynneD24 August 2007
Fun and funny – CYXORK 7 grabbed me in the first five minutes, and took me on a wild, satirical trip with plenty of laughs along the way. It sends up everything from Hollywood and TV news to aging adventure heroes and their devoted fans, with an earthquake thrown in for fun. Ray Wise is perfect as Kommander 88. The antics of the TV network GNN anchors are reason enough to see this film (keep your eyes on the "crawlers," they are ruthless). Immerse yourself in the desperate world of location film-making on a budget, with a cast and crew that won't fail to surprise you (or scare you half to death!) I hope sequels -- and CYXORK 1-6 prequels? -- are on the horizon.
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This one is out of the park!
payback-519 August 2007
This film was part of a screening at the B-Movie Celebration in Franklin , IN. The quality of the production and writing was above B movie convention. I'm trying to figure out why this piece isn't getting picked up by Sci-Fi or another affiliate. The movie is a great satire along the lines of "For Your Consideration". Ray Wise is at his level best and the whole of the cast makes this movie a must-see. Director John Huff hit it out of the park on this one! I really got a kick from Greg Proops as a talk show wise-ass, and his female sidekick. The other plus was the fun being poked at the Sci-Fi industry in general who tend to put out movies an a regular basis that leans heavily on plots with no real drama and heart. The casting couldn't be better and the production standards were top notch.
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The Most Fun I've Had At An Indie Movie!!
brian-148318 August 2007
Cyxork 7 is not so much a sci-fi movie, as much as it's a commentary on Hollywood and the film industry. The premise is simple, the Cyxork franchise is on the wane, but internet geeks have kept it alive, now a script generated by the web nerds is going to restart the franchise. But, due to the low budget, the filmmakers are forced to use an impending earthquake as their special effects.

Funny, biting and at times even heartwarming, Cyzork 7 is the indie movie that most Indies wish they were! A nice mix of recognizable and up-and-comers, a fantastic script and, just a lot of fun. You can tell that the cast and crew probably had as much fun making the movie as the audience does watching it.

If you have the chance to see Cyzork 7, don't miss it! You'll be missing out of a movie that's sure to be a cult favorite!
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