Teddy Newton: Lawyer (Talon Labarthe)
Skinner : [on Linguini] Look at him out there, pretending to be an idiot! He's toying with my mind like a cat with a ball... of something!
Lawyer : String?
Skinner : Yes! Playing dumb, taunting me with that RAT!
Lawyer : [confused] Rat?
Skinner : Yes! He's consorting with it, deliberately trying to make me think it's important!
Lawyer : The... rat?
Skinner : EXACTLY!
Lawyer : Is the rat important?
Skinner : [pause] Of course not! He just wants me to THINK that it is! O-ho, I see the theatricality of it! A rat appears on the boy's first night, I order him to kill it, and now he wants me to see it everywhere!
Skinner : [high voice] Ooooh! It's here! No it isn't it's here! Am I seeing things, am I crazy, is there a phantom rat or is there not, but oh, no! I refuse to be sucked into his little game... of...
Lawyer : Should I be concerned about this? About you?
Lawyer : Well, the will stipulates that if after two years from the date of death, no heir appears, Gusteau's business will pass on to his sous-chef, you.
Skinner : I know what the will stipulates! What I want to know, is if this letter - if this *boy* changes anything!
[the lawyer looks at Linguini through the window, comparing it to Gusteau's picture on the wall]
Lawyer : There's not much resemblance.
Skinner : There's NO resemblance at all! He's not Gusteau's son, Gusteau had no children! And what of the timing of all this? The deadline in the will expires in less than a month! Suddenly some boy arrives with a letter from his recently deceased mother claiming Gusteau is his father? Highly suspect!
Lawyer : [about a chef's toque in a glass container] ... This was Gusteau's?
Skinner : Yes.
Lawyer : May I?
Skinner : Of course, of course.
[the lawyer takes a hair out of the toque]
Lawyer : But, the boy does not know?
Skinner : She claims she never told him, or Gusteau, and asks that I not tell!
Lawyer : Why you? What does she want?
Skinner : A job, for the boy.
Lawyer : Only a job? Well, then this is easy. If he works here, you can keep an eye on him while I do a little digging, find out how much of this is real. I'll need you to collect some DNA samples from the boy, hair maybe...
Skinner : Mark my words, the whole thing is *highly* suspect. He knows... something.
Lawyer : Relax, he's a garbage boy. I think you can handle him.