Team America: World Police (2004) Poster

Kristen Miller: Lisa



  • Lisa : Promise me you'll never die.

    Gary Johnston : You know I can't promise that.

    Lisa : If you did that, I would make love to you right now.

    Gary Johnston : I promise I'll never die.

  • Lisa : Gary, you didn't kill your brother. Those gorillas did.

  • [repeated line] 

    Lisa : Sometimes... believing is all we have.

  • Lisa : Hey, terrorist! Terrorize this!

  • Lisa : [to Gary]  You had me at "dicks fuck assholes".

  • Kim Jong Il : Now you see, the changing of the worrd is inevitabre!

    Lisa : I'm sorry, it's what?

    Kim Jong Il : Inevit, inevitabre.

    Lisa : One more time.

    Kim Jong Il : [shouts]  Inevitabre! Things are inevitabrey going to change! Goddamnit, open your fucking ears!

  • Lisa : I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. is down! I repeat, we have no I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E.!

  • [last lines] 

    Lisa : Wait a minute! Look!

    [a cockroach crawls out of Kim Jong-Il's mouth and towards a spaceship] 

    Kim Jong Il : You have not heard the rast of Kim Jong-Il! I will return! You shall see. I will be back!

    [enters spaceship and launches out of the palace] 

    Kim Jong Il : So rong, Earthrings!

    Gary Johnston : We'll be here waiting for you, Kim Jong-Il!

    Chris : All right, you guys. I hate to break this little party, but there are still a lot of bad guys out there.

    Gary Johnston : Well, then let's go show the bad guys the police are back in force.

    Lisa : Fuck, yeah.

    Gary Johnston : Fuck, yeah.

  • Spottswoode : Team, I'm afraid I have bad news. At 7:15 this morning, the terrorists carried out their attack.

    Lisa : What?

    Sarah : But how can that be? Gary stopped the terrorists in Cairo.

    Spottswoode : It appears now that I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E was wrong about the Chechnyans being in charge. That was bad I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. Very bad I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E.

    Intelligence : I'm sorry.

  • Kim Jong Il : Now you see, the new world is inevitable.

    Lisa : It's what?

    Kim Jong Il : Inevit - inevitable.

    Lisa : One more time?

    Kim Jong Il : Inevitable! Things are inevitably going to change! Goddamnit, open your fuckin' ears!

  • Chris : What does Spottswoode see in him?

    Lisa : I don't know. But I think I see it too.

  • Lisa : Gary, you can't blame yourself for what gorillas did.

  • Lisa : I'm so confused!

    Lisa : It's too early for me to be having feelings for you.

    Gary Johnston : Maybe feelings are feelings because we can't control them.

  • Lisa : We lost I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E! I repeat, we have no I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E.

  • Lisa : Then what about all those things you promised me last night? You said you'd never leave.

    Gary Johnston : I said I'd never die. But now I'm... *dead inside*

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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