Two and a Half Men (TV Series 2003–2015) Poster


Angus T. Jones: Jake Harper, Marlene Melnick



  • Alan Harper : You're writing a report on The Taming Of The Shrew, not The Voyages Of Cap'n Crunch!

    Jake Harper : Too bad. I could write the crap out of that.

    Alan Harper : Okay... I'm not fooling around here...! You're gonna finish this DAMN BOOK and write the DAMN REPORT, and you're gonna hand it in on Monday, spell-checked, formatted AND ON FREAKIN' TIME!

    Jake Harper : I have my doubts, dad.

  • Jake Harper : [from blooper reel]  Uncle Charlie, you're a dick.

  • Alan Harper : A movie would be fine.

    Charlie : All right. A movie it is. What's out that's good?

    Jake Harper : There's a new pirate movie. It's rated "Arrrr"!

    [Alan and Charlie doesn't laugh and just stare at him] 

  • Alan Harper : A little religion isn't gonna kill you.

    Jake Harper : Oh yeah? What's *your* definition of bloodsoaked vengeance?

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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