3.7/10
252
25 user 17 critic

Meat Market (2000)

Unrated | | Action, Horror, Comedy | Video 6 December 2000
Animals attacks, says the TV news. But two ex-security agents know the real cause - maybe the real culprits. Shahrokh and Argenta are former employees of a company they knew to be ... See full summary »

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
Bettina May ... Argenta (as Claire Westby)
Paul Pedrosa ... Shahrokh
Alison Therriault ... Nemesis
Teresa Simon ... Valeria
Chelsey Arentsen ... Tiamat
Cam Pipes ... El Diablo Azul
Ivan Meade ... El Diablo Azul (voice)
Ken Peters ... Dr. Oppenheim
Clifton Mitchell ... Lt. Ayers
Bryn Johnson ... Pvt. Holden / Featured Zombie
Chris Clement ... The Mayor
Nick Sheehan ... Yuppie
Brian Clement ... City Official / SWAT Unit / Featured Zombie
Scott Roberts ... Officer Bate
Mark Walsh ... Officer Ramsey
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Storyline

Animals attacks, says the TV news. But two ex-security agents know the real cause - maybe the real culprits. Shahrokh and Argenta are former employees of a company they knew to be conducting bizarre medical experiments. What has resulted are not animals attacks, but attacks by humans turned into vicious, decomposing, cannibalistic zombies. Their efforts to stem the violence in vain, hunted by the authorities, Shahrokh and Argenta escape the city just as it is engulfed in chaos. Their only hope lies in finding and organizing the few remaining survivors. What they find - three women claiming to be vampires with high-tech weaponry, a deranged and washed-up Mexican wrestler, a wounded soldier, and a scientist who may know more than he lets on - offer more questions than answers. Can this tiny cadre hope to defeat an army of the undead? And if they succeed...will there be anyone left alive? Written by Anonymous

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From the depths of hell...the dead have returned to walk the earth. Pray for help.

Genres:

Action | Horror | Comedy

Certificate:

Unrated | See all certifications »

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6 December 2000 (USA)  »

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Did You Know?

Crazy Credits

As seen in the closing credits: "Actually everything you have just seen is true. The dead are rising. Buy a shotgun." See more »

Connections

Followed by Meat Market 2 (2001) See more »

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User Reviews

 
Meat Market: an experiment in what not to do in a zombie movie
13 January 2005 | by See all my reviews

This movie sounded too good to be true, and it was. Oh, sweet and merciful Gygax it was! So you got a zombie infestation, a Mexican wrestler, and lesbian vampires with laser guns. AND THE MOVIE STILL REAKS!!! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this movie has all the charm of a college movie experiment without all that great college acting. And that $2,000 budget's probably a bit literal with the math there. Most of the action takes place in either college dorms, one single condemned building, someone's basement, and a rock quarry. Yes, there is a bit of lesbian vampire action, but the shear stupid horror of this film doesn't make up. And the main character recites bone stupid poetry at inconvenient times. Now, the makeup job on the zombies is OKAY. It's not that bad. Oh, except for the fact that the SAME EIGHT EXTRAS MAKE UP THE ENTIRETY OF THE ZOMBIE POPULATION!!! This is what Meat Market does to children's shows:

MAGIC JACK: Howdy, Mister Greenjeans! Do you know what today's secret color is?

MR. GREENJEANS: (kills self with hammer)

Yes, Meat Market kills. I cannot convey, yea, even through interpretive dance, how bad this movie is. And to prove that anyone can make a better movie, I'm taking donations so that I can raise the three thousand dollars to make a far superior zombie movie with 98% less suck and 42% more lesbian vampire action. This movie gets a 1.


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