Nowhere Man

Chutzpah has a new--perhaps permanent--definition: NOWHERE MAN, an execrable would-be drama, would-be comedy, would-be satire, would-be goof/spoof, would-be Troma-type gore fest (Lloyd Kaufman even has a small role). So many would-be's and not a single be.

The height of the chutzpah is using outtakes during the end credits to what has already been one long outtake in itself. Without these dumber-than-usual add-ons, the film would have rolled in at just 70 minutes. With them, it stretches out the insult to 80. Jumping off (and crashing) from the John and Lorena Bobitt tale, the movie plays it mostly straight (very badly) but occasionally veers into leaden satire, which is even worse. The two leads could very possibly be decent actors. But not here. Technically the movie sucks, too, which leaves it without a single redeeming feature.

Now that I rethink for a moment, I must admit my earlier mistake: The tip-top height of chutzpah is that fact that this film actually received a theatrical release. Imagine the poor schnooks who paid movie-theatre prices!