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Crooked Lines (2003)

Johnny, a small time criminal in his late thirties, has been trying to get ahead his whole life. Sure, hes managed to scrape up enough money over the years to refurnish his entire apartment... See full synopsis »


Harry O'Reilly


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Cast overview, first billed only:
Adam Trese ... Johnny
Jim Breuer ... Chris
Burt Young ... Mike Ameche
Tony Darrow ... Jimmy Pico
John Costelloe ... Manny
Alison Bartlett ... Andrea
Colin Quinn ... Annoying Customer
David Johansen ... Charlie
Mario Cantone ... Cliff
Joseph D'Onofrio ... Sal
Anthony Mangano ... Joe
Anne Meara ... Hard Boiled
John F. O'Donohue ... Detective Anderson
Frank Santorelli Frank Santorelli ... Detective Harris
Harry O'Reilly Harry O'Reilly ... One Glove


Johnny, a small time criminal in his late thirties, has been trying to get ahead his whole life. Sure, hes managed to scrape up enough money over the years to refurnish his entire apartment, but he hasnt been able to do much else. Andrea, Johnnys girlfriend, knowing all too well of his situation and not happy about it, offers him a chance to better himself. He can work for her father driving a bread truck, or he can probably lose her. Johnny, sensing Andreas loss of patience, reluctantly agrees to the first part, but thats when something comes up... That something is Manny, a mistreated hit man for the Angelino crime family and Johnnys good friend. He tells Johnny about a deli the Angelinos use as a front for their drug trading, and about how it will have a million cash just sitting in it on the last day of February. All they need to do is get three guys not from around that they can count on to go into the deli and get the money. Johnny agrees to take part, but only on the condition ...

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Release Date:

18 May 2003 (France) See more »

Also Known As:

Panhazoi listes See more »

Company Credits

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Technical Specs


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Did You Know?


References Throw Momma from the Train (1987) See more »


Skating Away
Written by Ian Anderson
Performed by Scrumptious
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User Reviews

pretty dumb but funny so called mafia comedy movie from ben stiller?
27 February 2006 | by lrademacherSee all my reviews

I unfortunately bought this DVD from one of those 2 for $10 bins at my local video store. I was bored one day and wanted a dark comedy and this says "Ben Stiller presents crooked lines, the funniest comedy you've never seen this year." that's apparently true, as it seems here on IMDb, no one has posted anything about it at all. I don't blame them if they did see it. I asked my pals who work at the local video store and none of them had heard of it either. Interesting no where in the credits is Ben Stiller listed other than the back & front of the DVD case. Jim Breuer, Burt Young, & Colin Quinn are listed as the head acts in this film, strangely I only saw Colin Quin in like 4 scenes. Burt Young was decent but over all the film dragged on with stupid new york mafia clichés and every now and then a spattering of "f" words. Jim Breuer wasn't bad in his role either but everyone else in the movie was forgettable and the only interesting character in the entire flick was an annoying little dog who had a habit for "humping" a towel.

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