CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (TV Series 2000–2015) Poster

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8/10
Entertainment on steroids
George Parker4 August 2004
The hugely popular "CSI" is no less than a contemporary entertainment marvel. Finding its stride in season 2 with a formula which pushes the envelope while still being doable, this series packs ample portions of entertainment into 40 minute episodes while staying fresh, delivering palatable doses of science didactically, and, most of all, manifesting a strong sense of social responsibility in all of its subliminals. While most entertainment aims for the crotch, the gut, or the heart, "CSI" goes for the most difficult target, the head, as it teaches forensics and the empirical process while remaining cooly detached from sensationalism and melodrama all the while using the "truth is stranger (and more interesting) than fiction" thesis to its and our advantage. The results are fun and interesting lessons in everything from dwarfism to Down syndrome to anatomy to ballistics to etc. all the while maintaining a social conscience. Whether explaining how S&M is not necessarily perversion to simply dissing Don King, "CSI" is one sweet sugar coated education with solid mainstream values. My favorite lines? CSI1:"There's a sucker born every minute." CSI2: "Yeah. And they all come to Vegas." Truer words....
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Outstanding!!!
kidcurry19677 December 2000
C.S.I. is the best new show of the 2000 season! William L. Petersen is the coolest of the cool as Gil Grissom. I've followed his career since I first saw him in To Live and Die in L.A. He's an amazing actor and he heads up a cast of amazing actors as well. This show really keeps you on the edge of your seat as the investigators literally take a crime scene that appears to leave them with nothing to go on. The investigators take nothing and turn it into something amazing as each crime is solved right in front of you and you as the viewer, never see it coming! Wow! I hope this is one show CBS will pick up year after year!
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Must see TV!!
CSI has come to the UK and has been on our screens for around a year. I saw the first episode and was impressed but like with a lot of TV series I found good such as the X-files I just forgot about it and never watched it, anyway about 2 months ago I heard and advert on the radio for it and so watched it. I have been watching it religously since, I have missed most of series one and the first few episodes of series two which annoys me but every episode is great, well written and excellently acted and directed. What sets this out from other TV shows is the incredibly professional look, from the movie like cinematography to the brilliant acting, the writing is always very good and the plot twists always surprising whilst feasible. I wish I had watched it since series one. I am a fan of Marg Helgenberger, I find her very sexy, she is a gorgeous woman and this really made me finally decide to watch it, as I usually watch something from the movie channels on saturdays. The show has a great production value and its got that Bruckheimer class about it. They always have good directors such as Danny Cannon who also did the underrated Stallone flick Judge Dredd. All the actors are good the two younger guys played by Gary Dourdon and George Eads and the nice looking Joja Fox and they and Marg are all led by the ultra intelligent Gill Grissom, excellently played by the one of the shows producers William Peterson, the lines Grissom has are classic. The show has some generally interesting characters who are all likeable. This show is pure TV excellence and it gets a bonus thumbs up because they cast one of my fave actors Mark Dacascos in an episode which should reach the UK in about 7 weeks. 10/10
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Original and entertaining
stamper4 September 2002
CSI is one of the best TV series of the last few years (with Law and Order: Special Victims unit and That 70's show). Not only is it original and exciting, but the acting is top shelf as well. The producers and the people from casting, most famously represented by Jerry Bruckheimer, really did a great job in bringing together a perfect team of actors. The two most famous to me were Marg Helgenberger (Catherine Willows) and Paul Guilfoyle (Jim Brass) who have had a couple of minor roles in some films I saw. The rest of the crew are William L.Petersen (Gil Grissom), Jorja Fox (Sara Sidle), Gary Dourdan (Warrick Brown) and George Earls (Nick Stokes)

The main characters from CSI, although flawed, like all human beings, are all likeable in their own way, including Greg Sanders (portrayed by Eric Szmanda). Despite the fact that all of the characters like their work and seem a bit obsessed by it, all characters are unique. Grissom is the wise, well educated loner, who seems to be the tough yet soft mentor to the rest of the crew. He likes to play with bugs and at times he seems not to forget what it means to be social. Sidle portrays some kind of a younger version of Grissom. She is eager to be the best, dedicated to her work night and day and quite the loner as well. Willows plays the modern woman. Dedicated to her work, but also a mother, which seems hard to balance at times. Warrick and Stokes are the manly men in the series, always competing to prove themselves and showing the other one who is the best.

The characterizations of the persons portrayed along with everyones way of conduct and the great stories provide and interesting, humane and charming show, to be enjoyed by many people for a long time (I hope). Tune in and get your own opinion. Here is mine.

9 out of 10 (because I do not give a 10)
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8/10
Just terrific!
AlabamaWorley197124 November 2000
I've always been fascinated by forensic science, so this was tailor-made for me! It's intelligent and literate, with intriguing stories and lots of cool crime-fighting toys. If you liked MANHUNTER (1986), which also starred William Petersen, you'll enjoy this. High quality TV.
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Crime-busting has not been this intriguing in years!
Old Joe16 October 2002
I am not sure whether TV accurately shows us real life professions or not. One thing I do know, is that when I find a good TV series, I stick with it. I have done precisely that with CSI, although it has taken its time to grow on me. However once it did, I cannot miss a minute of it. Considering that Australian TV has had many 'crime' based TV shows in the past and the present, it is refreshing to watch an American spin on the ‘crime' theme. CSI is now a weekly viewing ritual that I could not imagine being without.

The crime is committed and the scene is set. Then it is time for it to be investigated. This is Crime Scene Investigation (C.S.I.), which is all about a team of Las Vegas Criminalists working the graveyard shift at the Las Vegas Crime Lab. The team is led by veteran Gil Grissom with Catherine Willows, Nick Stokes, Warrick Brown, and Sara Sidle. They are all on the look out for the clues, which could make the difference in their next big case.

Not seeing the first series in its entirety has not hindered my love for this show. In fact it has made me appreciate it all the more. This show is the creation of big-time Hollywood man, Jerry Bruckheimer. But there are other people that deserve praise when it comes to bringing this show to our small screen. All of the directors and producers make this show flow beautifully. Add in the fascinating and interesting stories that have been written make for one terrific show. I especially enjoy how the show has so much packed into each episode. Having two or more cases in every show gives it the perfect feel and pace. I also like how some episodes have all the evidence collected by the certain members of the CSI group, but that it is still not enough to convict anyone (or group) of a crime, whether it be a murder, assault or theft.

Then look at what a great cast has been assembled for this show. I like the people who are all a part of CSI. The main man is Gil Grissom, the boss of CSI. He is portrayed well by William L. Peterson. I like how his character shows how he uses all his past experience to help solve a case. The people under Grissom include Catherine Willows (Marg Helenbeger), Nick Stokes (George Eads), Warrick Brown (Gary Dourdan), and Sara Sidle (Jorja Fox). All these characters are different, challenge each other, in addition to being careful not to get to close to their victims or suspects. I find the way all these people get their job done to be of the utmost professionalism.

If this group were real crime-busting team, I am sure I would like them on my case, whether I was or related to a victim. This show is so good to watch, whether you are in a stressful job or in a family situation, as it is relaxing and educational. I hear that there is a spin off series called ‘CSI Miami'. I am not sure whether this series will be better than its predecessor, but one thing is for sure – I will more than likely giving it a chance to mesmerise me like CSI has. In the TV world being a perpetrator or an accomplice of a crime is not a smart idea, as it is more than likely that one of the gang from the Las Vegas ‘CSI' will be the next knock on your door, and proving that you were part of the crime.
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Brilliant
SMLA115 June 2002
C.S.I: Crime Scene Investigation is a truly brilliant show that follows a bunch of investigators of murders who find out how the death happened and possibly find out who did it. The show is excellent on many levels. The characters are very cool and well-developed. The storylines are brilliant. Almost every story is perfect and imaginative. I love this show.

Overall the show is excellent and highly recommended. Rating A++.
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ONE OF THE BEST SERIES I'VE EVER SEEN
Gustavo Bastos22 February 2001
Takes another another angle of vision for cops and crime series. Everything is perfect: the choose of the cast, the cast themselves, the stories, etc. Although some can think of gore scenes, the episodes are not so violent as the similar we have usually. A suggestion: it should be a good idea to start to show some aspects of the their personal lives.
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Spectacular!
Jeff Cross7 October 2000
I love it! I took a course on forensic chemistry in college and found it to be a whole lot of fun, and this show just took me back. In addition to seeing all the cool ways the crime scene unit can place you at the scene and ultimately prove you did the crime, it has gallows humor/sarcasm and edge. I hope they don't cancel it.
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4/10
Two things you need to know about C.S.I.
Movester22 February 2009
Warning: Spoilers
One: your screen will be filled with beautiful effects and colours. These do nothing for the story, but they will keep your lazy eyes occupied for some 50 minutes. A good example is the eternal use of a computer screen that shows each fingerprint from the database as that print is compared with the one they want to find out about. Yeah, right.

Two: these guys being like real professional Pros, they will engage each other in intriguing Pro talk: "Look, Grissom, these are what we call fingerprints. Everybody has them, and they are different on each person. So, with these fingerprints we can actually find...".

Yup! Exactly like real pros would talk to each other if there wasn't a completely uninformed and stupid audience around.

However, not everything about this show is bad. Some stories work to some degree, and the colours _are_ really beautiful. They use red, blue, green, yellow... all of them colours I've loved since kindergarten.
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What's happened to CBS?
millennia-26 October 2000
In the past few months, the world has witnessed a dramatic transformation. Well... maybe not very dramatic, or even much of a transformation either, but it's still an event that rarely happens in the world of entertainment. Just a couple short months ago, CBS, then by far the least threatening and underachieving of the four major networks (NBC, Fox, and ABC being the others), was in the midst of a slow but steady decline, with no major shows outside 'Nash Bridges' and the ancient '60 Minutes'. Since then, there was the mega hit 'Survivor', and now they've pumped up their Friday line-up with an update of 'The Fugitive', and 'C.S.I', an exceptional one hour drama, along the lines of 'Law & Order: SVU'.

William Petersen and Marg Helgenberger star in this original and very slick crime series produced by film veteran Jerry Bruckheimer. The flashy cinematography and compelling stories make up for bouts of an identity crisis, and some minor plot holes. The Las Vegas setting really helps, it's definitely a welcome change from the normal New York and LA locations in most other series', especially with the great aerials placed in between scenes. 'C.S.I' would be a worthy addition the the line-ups of any of the networks, and should be a hit.

7/10
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8/10
A great show, but not as good as it used to be
TheLittleSongbird21 April 2010
I love these kinds of shows, so I came across CSI:Crime Scene Inestigation by accident while flicking through channels, and since that moment I have been hooked. I like how each crime is looked at from a different perspective, it offers a whole new slant on things, although some of the more disturbing/graphic images may turn your stomach a little. Also, I love the colours the series is shot in, reds, blues, greens and yellow, really a treat to the eye, and the photography is very impressive. And the music is funky and cool, well the theme song is from The Who, they ooze with coolness. I like the writing, Grissom's dialogue and asides are a joy to behold especially, and the methodical but well structured story lines. The season finales nearly always manage to be gripping and compelling. And the acting is great, William Peterson was wonderful as Grissom, and although I was sad to see him go, the character's departure was handled very well so I was glad of that. The reason why it isn't quite as good as it could have been is because somehow I don't find it as well thought out as the earlier seasons. And while Laurence Fishburne is a great actor and does a good job, I kind of miss Grissom if you get the jist. That said though, this is a great show. 8/10 Bethany Cox
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10/10
I know I'm late but WOW
Josh Shepherd11 September 2006
Warning: Spoilers
This show is the greatest show ever created. I mean the second I turned on the T.V. it just threw me in there and made me feel like I was par of the CSI team.

Just the other day I felt behind so I went to Blockbuster and rented Season 1-3 to try and catch up and I didn't go to sleep until I finished watching every episode.

This show has some amazing characters as well: Gil Grissom; great guy but is very hard headed about his science Nick Stokes; gets cocky a lot but is one of the best Sara Sidle; great character she is all business when it come to work but loves to play ;) Greg Sanders; my personal favorite he loves his job while he is in the lab but loves it more when he gets out on the field Warrick Brown; gets in really deep with his cases and makes them personal Catherine Willows; great investigator but has a lot of personal problems The list goes on. This show is just flat out amazing and I would recommend it to anybody my Rating= **********/**********
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7/10
Perfect Cast
bluedragon01104 September 2006
After initially being introduced to this series, I instantly fell in love with the show. I feel that the writing is very inventive and even when the show is based off of something from the news, the writers do an excellent job of putting a unique spin on it to fit the fluidness of the shows style. But what I think makes this show so successful is the characters and the way each of the cast members pull off their character to bring a unique blend of personalities that work perfectly off of each other. The characters of Grissom and Willows, played by William Peterson and Marg Helgenberger, give the show its balance. Then you have characters like Nick Stokes (played by George Eads) who is your typical guy's guy and Warrick Brown (played by Gary Dourdan) who is more level but the two play off of each other very well, as you tend to see them in competition with each other. The writers have also written in a great character named Sara Sidle (played by Jorja Fox) who is portrayed as a confident woman in a manly male dominated cast. Sidle is able to stand her ground and even at times run circles around Stokes and Brown, yet she still has the uncertainties and emotions of a woman, but it is played with an certain grace that makes the audience feel confident in her character. The writers have taken great lengths to make sure that the science, which is also a character in this show, is very accurate, yet easy enough for the audience to understand. It is very easy to see why this show has become such a hit, and its spin off shows (Miami and NY) are becoming just as popular.
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1/10
Awful and overrated
nablaquadro22 April 2007
First of all, it's not useless confronting X-Files with CSI, but to better understand we have to study the two decades when they've developed their success.

X-Files is the King of crime TV-series in the 90s (until the early 2000s), CSI is the 2000s corresponding. The technical abilities were different 14/15 years ago than now, so a greater dosage of paranormal activities and unsolved cases is justified either for entertainment, and for material difficulties.

Don't we forget the charisma inside the two starring actors. Nobody else could be Mulder and Scully but Duchovny and Anderson.

CSI are lame chronicle of infallible detectives that seem to know IN ADVANCE whatever they carry to the laboratory. Analysises and experiments seem a mere game to demonstrate they were right anyway two hours before and the coldness is punch in the stomach for the audience. Grissom, Willows and the other actors are detestable and quite unpleasant, even because you already know that no case is unsolved for them.

The "dark" atmosphere, the blood profusion, and the gruesome amusement is also something to be deprecated, considering the young audience watching this series. They paint the forensic job as a game, the corpses as a playground and violence as something ordinary. No. These are bad principles to pass at the new generations ! One of the worst TV-series and widely overrated by public.

A super deserved " 1 "
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3/10
Concept great, execution not so great
movietech9 August 2006
I like the concept of CSI, but the show is spoiled by some seriously wooden acting. The Medical Examiner has the best lines and delivers them in an arch, offhand manner that livens up the story. Unfortunately he has little screen time.

Also, why does Jorja Fox always look and act so utterly unhappy? I know that forensic investigation is a very serious business, but the characters, for the most part, seem to confuse seriousness with humorlessness and a complete lack of personality. I can't imagine dating either Sarah Sidle or Catherine Willows; what would you talk to either one about? I'm waiting for the episode when, at the end of a shift, Catherine picks up a remote control, points it at Grissom, shuts him down, and wheels him into a closet until the next day.
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1/10
very bad show
dennis200721 March 2012
when you added Ted Danson and Elizibeth Shue to the show,i don't watch it anymore.it stinks.messed up my Wednesday night.don't know much more too say.why any one would add a comedian in a mystery show is about dumb.you must have fired the better writers.i am not all that smart,but when a show is popular,why change the people that made the show so well liked.i change channels when its on.Danson is so dry and boring,he just doesn't fit the part.Shue's person comes off as a smart ass know it all.she couldn't be on anything that i would watch.Ted needs to go back to tending bar.with the characters you have now,you may as well turn it into a comedy show.if you people were smart,you would put the show back the way it was and quit messing it up.i just don't like it at all.
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2/10
Good things don't last, do they?
Crveni Krst4 November 2010
I used to like "CSI Las Vegas"... used to like i it a lot. Back in 2001. when I saw the first episodes, it was a refreshing TV substance, beside the fact it was based on crime and murder, which I am not a great fan of. Unlike the classic detective series which by the late 90s have become boring as hell with all too predictable plots, CSI brought a fresh insight and opened a new window into TV crime. Although it was only slightly based on science and criminal forensics, CSI was a fun thing to watch... it was indeed.

And, as the good old pattern of profanity goes, so did "CSI Las Vegas" transform into yet another pointless money making program. The forensic detectives, who in real life work in a lab alone, slowly became sheriffs, the scientific methods turned into cyber 3D mumbo jumbo and the crimes became bizarre to the least . I stopped watching after the episode with a stuffed woman's head hanging on the wall, and Grissom in his ever witty manner saying something like "I feel like Marco Polo, It seems I've discovered China", China being the name of woman whose had smiled at us. Just horrible. Then we got the franchise series which wont spend any words at, as they are not worthy of any.

It's pretty sure that CBS makes good cash off the CSI series these days, and I'm so sorry that today's audience can be entertained so easily and tasteless. RIP CSI Las Vegas.

Two stars only for the early shine. The rest is TV sludge.
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5/10
Watchable, yet too plastic
Dark_liquid29 June 2009
I believe that the thing i hate mostly about criminal series is the...perfection. They always solve the cases in that steady rhythm, just like a well trained music band. So nice, so easy, so sci-fi at moments, with everybody doing their job brilliantly, with the help of their uber cool technical equipment; almost iritant. It is somewhat enjoyable, i suppose because of the use of excellent cinematic techniques, but i can never get excited watching it. I can't get in touch with the victim, i can't feel what the killer felt, i can't get upset when some supposedly important twist happens. I'm never surprised. Alright, i know i'm asking for too much out of an hour long episode, but even in such case, i don't think it's impossible do make that level of quality investigation drama happen. In CSI, it just feels like it's all about the looks; the show looks good and it's estheticaly very pleasant, but wait a minute, what about the story?
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An inconsequential series with classic style over substance
liquidcelluloid-124 April 2004
Network: CBS; Genre: Crime/Mystery; Average Content Rating: TV-14; Available: on DVD; Classification: Contemporary (star range: 1 - 4);

Season Reviewed: Series (3+ seasons)

Like 'NYPD Blue' before it, 'CSI is a show I've watched several times and have never been able to get into it. The phenomenal success of the show completely mystifies me. I suspect it is in part the audience rebelling against the soap opera turn their old Thursday night drama 'ER' has taken and in part because CSI is the kind of self-contained "procedural show" that networks love to promote the hell out of. It's certainly the hippest thing on CBS. I've generally made it a rule not to discuss a show's success in a review, as it doesn't influence its quality. 'CSI', however, is one of those shows that is mostly known only for it's success. Would a show like this really get Emmy nominations if it wasn't the number 1 show on TV?

Riding the reality show wave where pandering to the lowest common denominator is the new network attitude; action movie maestro Jerry Bruckheimer delivers a show that fits perfectly into all the network specifications. CSI certainly isn't as bad as all that. It has it's moments of atmospheric intensity and a solid amount of twists and turns in its stories. Not to mention more flash and trash gore than your late local news. But it isn't particularly good either. It falls through the same tedious narrative trapdoors of a 'Law & Order' type. The emphasis is on evidence, the self contained story (which, like 'L&O' are "ripped from the headlines" or lazy recreations of real events) and the show's synthetic style. That synthetic style, by the way, so contrasts to it's old fashioned theme music that it is downright jarring. The money-shot gimmick here is a computer generated camera straight out of a David Fincher movie that swoops in and around microscopic evidence. In this type of show developed characters, story arcs and acting are all de-emphasized and, in turn, I feel no reason to tune in every week. It's generally the same stuff week in and week out. The only story arc going on here is watching the many stages of William Peterson's ridiculous beard. It amazes me that people will tune in every week to shows that are designed so they don't have to, but will not tune in to a show that watching it every week would give them a richer storytelling experience. But, hey, if this type of thing floats your boat you should be in inconsequential, crime mystery series heaven.

* * / 4
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10/10
Unbelievably good!!!
YL X11 November 2006
CSI Las Vegas is the best TV show is have seen in many years. I became a fan of crime related show several years ago. I have always consider X-files to be the best TV series until i bought the DVD of CSI. And to be honest, this one is even better! intriguing plot, excellent acting and, there's humor. and the city Las Vegas seems to have so many interesting, sometimes rather ironic ways of living, i just can't get enough of it! Someone thought CSI has jumped the shark in season 4, but i think in season 6 things are just getting more interesting. the whole season 6 kept me on the edge of the seat, so did the new season 7. i hope the show never ends,really!
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They must have listened!?
benzene2 June 2001
I gave the show another try and it's almost a totally different show. Instead of having three or four investigations in each show, they focus on one main investigation and maybe a minor side. They do the investigations thoroughly and how I envision (I am not in any way related to the field) it would really happen.

The acting is massively better, without all the heavy dialog and serious looks. William Petersen's character, Grissom, has a quirky, off-beat sense of humor that you'd almost expect from a person with the gruesome responsibilities he has.

They even have a few moral dilemmas once in a while to bring out the human side of the characters that "Law and Order" purposely avoids.

It's turned into a very entertaining show.
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3/10
A lullaby for the middle class
woongah-drawings28 June 2010
It may seem strange. I hate CSI, in all its versions, almost as much as I love "The Wire".

On one hand, it appears to me some form of disguised "science fiction": the efficiency of the crime labs depicted seems, frankly, unearthly.

I tend to believe more in the messy lab depicted in "The Wire", the one with the blood samples rotting in a broken freezer, than to all the (highly) expensive tests of CSI and their superhuman ability to perform near state-of-the-art verifications.

On the other end, I can't help but find disgusting most of the fiends: they almost always kill for pretty silly reasons.

Looking at them, from my country (I'm Italian - CSI arrived here too...) they are almost incomprehensible (the whole country has less homicides per year than a couple of USA major cities, let's say Baltimore plus Detroit ).

And, frankly, upsetting. Is this the future of occidental civilization?

Ah, I almost forgot: to my eyes the protagonists look all, each one for his own reason, as a bunch of S.O.B. that I would never want as neighbors.

If I had to select a show I should stop watching, is CSI. In fact, I stopped.

I happened to look it just because there was nothing else (not better, else) to watch on Tuesday night, waiting for "Last Exile" in the local MTV anime evening.

Six full episodes of disgust, before I gave up.

Than, I took a look at the first episodes of the spin-offs, just to see if anything changes. Nothing really change, it's the same stuff cooked the same way.

All its value is in its being the classic lullaby for the middle class: the shining knights of CSI will discover the assassins through their supreme expertise and technology, so that every God-fearing, law abiding good citizen can go to sleep under three wool blankets. Which is probably the reason of its success.
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One Word: AMAZING!
icegirl27728 December 2012
CSI is an amazing television series that is always fresh and leaves you on the edge of the seat. The characters are actual human beings you can relate to and the acting is real and warm. There is always a different crime to every episode and it's never repeated over and over again.

All the seasons are also amazing in their own unique way. Here's how I rate them.

Season 1 = an amazing start

Season 2 = an emotional ride

Season 3 = I have no words

Season 4 = very interesting

Season 5 = all I can say is this... WOW!

Season 6 = a new beginning

Season 7 = OH MY GOD! Words cannot describe its awesomeness!

Season 8 = short but sweet

Season 9 = filled with some much drama

Season 10 = interesting arc (not saying what in case you haven't seen season 10 yet)

Season 11 = my favorite season so far

Season 12 = addictive

Season 13 (current season) = shaping out to be another hit

But something they all have in common: the talent the writers have to mix crime, drama, humor, family and a touch of romance (watch the series, there is some romance) together in a way that doesn't focus too particularly on one thing.

All in all, CSI is an amazing show that I would recommend for anyone. I hope it never ends!
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9/10
Numero Uno
henry-429-88363218 September 2012
Warning: Spoilers
Great acting, great research, great writing, great photography. The series bear watching over and over again. I can't think of a better crime drama.

It is however a tiny bit formulaic from time to time. SO on a light- hearted note I thought I'd distill the formula as much as possible.

spoiler:

a) Either boys playing around, or lovers having hot sex (with essential undies inexplicably still on) chance upon, become, or walk by a disembodied head/skeleton

b) Grissom is suddenly there, quoting Confucius at the puzzled CSIs. David is taking the liver temperature (unless it's a disembodied head or skeleton)

c) Sara picks up a cigarette, then gives an explanation for any thick viewers out there "This was not a hit and run!"

d) Grissom says "evidently he didn't run enough", or some other wise- crack, and ...

e) TITLES: "Who are you do do do do". Never get tired of 'em

f) on the other side of town, Catherine's progress towards a crime scene is impeded by a dumb male jobsworth. Because she's smart and has the facts at her fingertips she sets him straight, squashes his ego in fact. Squish

g) she strolls haughtily in on a crime scene and points a torch at a racing track, nods sagely and says "Testosterone!" as if that explained everything

h) meanwhile back at the lab, Grissom and Doc Robbins are having a chat over a dead body, usually one showing signs of "petechial haemorraging". Their conversation is useless to them, but might be useful for anyone who happened to be watching who hadn't yet drawn the 'correct' moral conclusions about the scenario,

i) Nick and Warrick make an unspecified and probably inappropriate bet about the new hot chick in DNA lab,

j) cut to the Cool Science Scene. A CSI does a week-long experiment in 2 minutes, accompanied by booming Radiohead/Sigur Ros/etc

k) Greg eloquently (for a nerd) explains how many jobs HE did in that 2 minutes,

l) Grissom and Sara flirt in much the same tone of voice as nerds call out blindfold chess moves to each other. Same facial expression too.

m) they close in on the killer who is Not Who You Thought It Was. Brass' wisecracks at this stage provide 50% of the show's pleasure

n) Catherine's killer turns out to be either a 12 yr old girl who smiles back uncaringly, or a mother who has just killed her daughter. Catherine, whose daughter is the same age, looks disillusioned and world-weary.

o) Nick solves the main case for the 100th time. Grissom explains to him that he's not quite good enough yet

p) more "The Who". Warm feeling inside, tempted to watch another...
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