Miss Congeniality (2000)
William Shatner: Stan Fields
Stan Fields : What is the one most important thing our society needs?
Gracie Hart : That would be harsher punishment for parole violators, Stan.
[crowd is silent]
Gracie Hart : And world peace!
[crowd cheers ecstatically]
Stan Fields : Thank you, Gracie Lou.
Gracie Hart : And thank *you*, Stan.
[Gracie walks offstage]
Victor Melling : That was charming. Are you drunk?
Gracie Hart : I'm glad you enjoyed it. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go unscrew my smile!
Stan Fields : Prepare for what promises to be a day of astounding musical, theatrical, and dancing talent. And after I'm finished you can see the ladies!
Karen "New York" : I just want to let all the lesbians out there know: if I can make it to the top ten, so can you! Big out to Brooklyn! Yo!
Dave the Pageant Director : Get her off of there! Go to Stan!
Karen "New York" : [to a girl in the audience] Tina, I love you, baby!
Tina : Oh, Karen! I love you, Karen!
Karen "New York" : Yo, Tina! I love you, baby!
[Gracie, watching the scene, applauds, whoops, and nods in approval]
Stan Fields : And we'll be right back with our final five lesbians - interviews!
Dave the Pageant Director : Bumper, commercial, can we say lesbians?
Assistant Director : You got a problem with that?
Stan Fields : And we'll be right back with our five final lesbians - interviews!
[at the pageant breakfast]
Stan Fields : As you know, I'll be retiring this year.
[everyone moans in sympathy]
Mary Jo Wright, Miss Texas : Oh, he's not retiring. I spoke to him this morning, the poor man blurted out the whole thing. They're firing him. Going for someone newer and younger. I hope it's Ricky Martin.