Guinea Pig 2: Flower of Flesh and Blood

I'm going to say something that I've seen very few reviews anywhere say: Guinea Pig: Flowers of Flesh and Blood really, simply is NOT that gory. Do not misunderstand me. I'm not one of the countless reviewers who are complaining this movie didn't look realistic. Some of those people wouldn't think a real body being cut up looked realistic if they didn't know it was real. What I'm saying is, the actual events depicted on screen simply weren't all that gory or sick. Not by today's standards.

It's a sad little world when you read the internet nerds who hide behind a cheesy screen name and trash modern torture movies because they're not gory enough for their supposed juggernaut balls. Most of them speak with elegance, spouting off the names of obscure Japanese movies that are "So sick!" and "Make Hostel look like a family movie!" Put simply: They're almost always wrong. What's sadder than that is that most people don't realize their wrong, even after they watch oh-so-sick obscure movie and shyly realize they've seen worse on the Saw promo posters, but would never admit it because it would mean going against the self-proclaimed film buffs.

That is why I'm here to stand against the crowd and say what needs to be said. Flowers of Flesh and Blood is not the goriest movie of all time. For someone who's seen modern torture movies, it's not even that gory at all, and here is why . . .

First and foremost, as has been stated by almost everyone, this movie has no plot. It's pure fake snuff from open to close. I have absolutely nothing against that at all. While it was too tame for me to fully enjoy, the lack of a plot made the film very intense and easy to sit through without getting bored. On the other hand, however, the lack of a plot made the film seem a lot more brutal than it actually was. If you were to take any of the five Saw films and cut out every minute except the pure gore, all of them would seem just as intense, if not more intense, than Flowers of Flesh and Blood. If you were to add forty more minutes of plot to Flowers of Flesh and Blood, it would seem just just as tame as all the Hollywood torture films that the self-proclaimed film buffs all call tame. Don't mistake intensity for gore.

Second, Flowers of Flesh and Blood isn't something you can just walk to the local video store and get five copies of. It's nowhere even slightly as well-known as Saw and Hostel. The obscurity is something self-proclaimed film buffs have always fed off of, and if this were something you could easily pick up, the same self-proclaimed film buffs wouldn't even consider it gory. You see, it's not about content, it's all about lack of popularity that builds a false hype. Likewise, whenever someone says, for example, that Ichi the Killer is "The sickest movie I've ever seen!", the self-proclaimed film buffs all jump on his back and say they found it tame, even if they really didn't. Then they say something like, "But, man, go watch Flowers of Flesh and Blood—now there is a sick movie!" Again, the lesser known name build the hype.

Third, the gore content is simply uncreative. Standard limbs are severed as in every other standard gore movie ever. The only difference here is that the cameraman goes into ultra close-ups every few seconds to give the illusion that this movie is actually doing something that hasn't been done thousands of times.There were at least ten spots in the movie where my own mind went into things that could have been done to make the scene four times as gory, but the director doesn't even have half that imagination or balls. He stuck to the generic, seen-it-a-thousand-times gore scenes. That alone makes this inferior to the Saw and Hostel series as far as gore goes, not to mention inferior to the countless other modern films like The Decent and Inside. Point blank: there is nothing here that is sadistic or even that gory. Sadism implies that gore has creativity, and that is a total joke here. Gore implies that something is brutal and bloody, and, as I've said, compared to modern movies, this is fairly average.

Don't believe the hype that this is oh-so-gory.

On a technical level, the acting from the main villain a joke, as I think it was meant to be. The acting from the woman was very believable. The ultra close-ups became cheesy. The gore effects are nothing compared to the French gore film Inside, but I never once thought they lacked enough realism to become laughable, as some reviewers stated. You have to remember, also, that most of the reviewers who say they laughed at this movie are most likely saying that to overlook that they have weak stomachs. It's common.

On an entertainment level, I found this movie to be very much worth a watch, and very entertaining. I give it credit for the intensity. The only plot point in the film, that the killer only kills women, is a outright cliché, but it doesn't bear anything on the actual film.

Overall, Flowers of Flesh and Blood is a fun little torture film that lacks anything truly disturbing or gory, but is worth the watch if you're a gore fan. I'm really just sick of people hyping this to be so much gorier than the Hollywood norm, because it simply is not. The first five minutes of Saw IV alone, the autopsy scene, had every single thing this movie had. When it comes to the world of gore, this is the single most overrated film of all time.

4/10