Oscar: Huxley! First this guy ruined my beautiful Grouclland, and now, he's messin' with my frie...
[everyone is surprised to hear what Oscar just said]
Big Bird: Oscar, were you gonna say "friend"?
Oscar: No. I was gonna say... "French-fried fish-heads"!
[everyone else scoffs in disagreement]
Oscar: All right. So the little stink ball IS my friend. Oh, I gotta go do somethin' about this!
Gordon: [in jail] Hey! Can we get some water in here?
[gets a bucketful of water in the face]
Queen of Trash: Since I'm a Queen of my word, you're free to go and pursue the blanket or bed covering of your choice.
Ernie: Come on Bert, what kind of movie has a sad ending Bert?
Bert: Titanic. Titanic had a sad ending.
Huxley: Now get in the cartoonishly evil vehicle and drive!
Humongous Chicken: Now stand still. Like a piece of corn.
Bug: How about that Elmo? What guts! What spunk! What chutzpah!
Huxley: You know what, Bug? You are really beginning to bug me.
Bug: Hmm... That's probably because I'm a bug.
Bug: You have a very lovely singing voice.
Huxley: Thank you. I always fancied myself a singer. I was almost in a bus and truck show of West Side Story. They said I wasn't right for Maria. What do they know? I feel pretty.
Sharon Groan: You like me! You really like me! Get my good side... Oh, that's right. I don't have a good side.
Ernie: [Ernie hums, then turns to the audience] Hi there everybody! Welcome to the movie. Hey, we're so glad you came. Now...
Bert: [Bert appears, wearing a bath towel and showering cap] Ernie, Ernie.
Bert: Listen, I'm going to take a shower. Have you seen my antibacterial soap?
Ernie: No, Bert, I haven't.
Bert: Oh, now where did I...?
Ernie: Now, this movie you're about to see is all about Elmo.
Bert: Who are you talking to?
Ernie: The audience, Bert. They're right there.
[Bert walks up to the screen]
Bert: Wow, look at all those people!
Bert: Hey, nice cardigan!
[Bert laughs, sounding like a sheep baaing]
Ernie: Now, in this movie, Elmo is going to ask for your help. He wants you to talk and play along.
Bert: Uh, how do we start?
Ernie: It's easy: just count backwards from 10.
Ernie: [Ernie whispers to Bert] You see, Bert, that's how you start a movie, Bert.
Ernie: Can you all help us count backwards from 10?
Kids in audience: Yeah!
Ernie: Ready? Yell real loud!
Huxley: Maybe if I look at it this way:
[Huxley puts his hands to his eyes, making a binocular-like gesture, the pesties shriek]
Huxley: I know! I think it's time for Elmo to take a little "trip to the tunnel", if you know what I mean, huh?
[Huxley chuckles wickedly]
Bug: [from the monitor, eating popcorn] What'd you say, boss?
Huxley: Bug, what are you doing?
Bug: [with his mouth full of popcorn] Just having a little snack. Hard to do an evil bidding on an empty stomach.
Huxley: Oh, sure. Listen, Bug, listen good.
Huxley: Are you listening?
Huxley: Get back to work!
Oscar: Who says you can't go home again?
Susan: Oscar, maybe you can get your friends to tell us where Elmo is.
Oscar: In a minute. First I have to look at the old neighborhood here. Hey, I wonder where that old septic tank is.
Susan: Hey, wait a minute!
Gordon: No, Oscar, we've got to find Elmo first!
Susan: Let's go this way.
Grouch Cop: It's against the law to ask for help in Grouchland! You have the right to scream your head off. Should you give up the right to scream your head off, someone who will scream their head off... will be provided for you.
Oscar: Come on!
Cookie Monster: Me innocent. Hello? Me need cookies!