Fight Club (1999)
Helena Bonham Carter: Marla Singer
Richard Chesler : [1:04:51] The first rule of Fight Club is you don't talk about Fight Club?
Narrator : [Voice-over] I'm half asleep again; I must've left the original in the copy machine.
Richard Chesler : The second rule of Fight Club - is this yours?
Narrator : Huh?
Richard Chesler : Pretend you're me, make a managerial decision: you find this, what would you do?
Narrator : [pauses] Well, I gotta tell you: I'd be very, very careful who you talk to about that, because the person who wrote that... is dangerous.
[Gets up from the chair]
Narrator : [Talking slowly] And this button-down, Oxford-cloth psycho might just snap, and then stalk from office to office with an Armalite AR-10 carbine gas-powered semi-automatic weapon, pumping round after round into colleagues and co-workers. This might be someone you've known for years. Someone very, very close to you.
Narrator : [Voice-over] Tyler's words coming out of my mouth.
[Snatches the piece of paper from boss' hands]
Narrator : [Voice-over] And I used to be such a nice guy.
Narrator : Or maybe you shouldn't bring me every little piece of trash you happen to pick up.
Narrator : [Into phone] Compliance and Liability...?
Marla Singer : My tit's gonna rot off.
Narrator : [to boss] Would you excuse me? I need to take this.
[after vigorous sex with Tyler Durden]
Marla Singer : [52:52] My God. I haven't been fucked like that since grade school.
Marla Singer : I got this dress at a thrift store for one dollar.
Narrator : It was worth every penny.
Marla Singer : It's a bridesmaid's dress. Someone loved it intensely for one day, and then tossed it. Like a Christmas tree. So special. Then, bam, it's on the side of the road.
[Grabs Narrator's crotch]
Marla Singer : Tinsel still clinging to it. Like a sex crime victim. Underwear inside out. Bound with electrical tape.
Narrator : Well, then it suits you.
Marla Singer : You can borrow it sometime.
Marla Singer : You're the worst thing that's ever happened to me.
Narrator : Bob loved me because he thought my testicles were removed too. Being there, pressed against his tits, ready to cry. This was my vacation... and she ruined *everything*.
Marla Singer : This is cancer, right?
Narrator : This chick Marla Singer did not have testicular cancer. She was a liar. She had no diseases at all. I had seen her at Free and Clear, my blood parasite group Thursdays. Then at Hope, my bi-monthly sickle cell circle. And again at Seize the Day, my tuberculous Friday night. Marla... the big tourist. Her lie reflected my lie. Suddenly, I felt nothing. I couldn't cry, so once again I couldn't sleep.
Narrator : I'll tell you: we'll split up the week, okay? You take lymphoma, and tuberculosis...
Marla Singer : You take tuberculosis. My smoking doesn't go over at all.
Narrator : Okay, good, fine. Testicular cancer should be no contest, I think.
Marla Singer : Well, technically, I have more of a right to be there than you. You still have your balls.
Narrator : You're kidding.
Marla Singer : I don't know... am I?
Narrator : No, no! What do you want?
Marla Singer : I'll take the parasites.
Narrator : You can't have both the parasites, but while you take the blood parasites...
Marla Singer : I want brain parasites.
Narrator : I'll take the blood parasites. But I'm gonna take the organic brain dementia, okay?
Marla Singer : I want that.
Narrator : You can't have the whole brain, that's...
Marla Singer : So far you have four, I only have two!
Narrator : Okay. Take both the parasites. They're yours. Now we both have three...
Marla Singer : So, we each have three... that's six. What about the seventh day? I want ascending bowel cancer.
Narrator : [Narrating] The girl had done her homework.
Narrator : No. No, I WANT bowel cancer.
[the clerk gives them both a weird look]
Marla Singer : That's your favorite too? Tried to slip it by me, eh?
Marla Singer : There are things about you that I like. You're smart, you're funny, you're... spectacular in bed... But you're intolerable! You have very serious emotional problems. Deep seated problems for which you should seek professional help.
Narrator : I know, and I'm sorry...
Marla Singer : Yeah, you're sorry, I'm sorry, everybody's sorry, but... I can't do this anymore. I can't. And I won't. I'm gone.
[about attending support groups for diseases she doesn't have]
Marla Singer : It's cheaper than a movie, and there's free coffee.
[Holding up a wad of cash]
Marla Singer : You're not getting this back. I consider it asshole tax.
Marla Singer : [after taking a bottle of sleeping pills] This isn't a real suicide-thing. This is probably one of those cry-for-help things.
Marla Singer : Your whacked out bald freaks hit me with a fucking broom! They almost broke my arm! They were burning their fingertips with lye, the stink was unbelievable!
Marla Singer : I've got a stomachful of Xanax. I took what was left of a bottle. It might have been too much.
Marla Singer : I've been going to Debtor's Anonymous. You want to see some really fucked-up people...
Marla Singer : Candy-stripe a cancer ward. It's not my problem.
Marla Singer : Slide.
[spoken after appearing in the Narrator's guided meditation visualization in place of his power animal, a penguin]