Proxate Corporation recruits a boozy former ship captain and offers him a new identity: Sean Murdoch. His job: to take charge of large ship on one voyage. Once aboard, Murdoch realizes that...
See full summary »
In the not so distant future mankind has squandered their resources. A team of specialists is sent to the nearby asteroid field to retrieve an asteroid that will serve to replenish some of ... See full summary »
Heidi von Palleske,
The world is a bleak desolate place where the people live in elevated cities. As the ground is uninhabitable, the citizens spend most of their lives wasting their time in virtual reality. ... See full summary »
In a world where two men in close proximity will eventually draw guns, Rico "BULLET" Burke finds himself at a crossroads. Having long ago ruined his brilliant collegiate football career ... See full summary »
Williamson plays a cop called 'Soda Cracker', whose partner was killed in a mysterious assassination. He is convinced that the murder was committed by his old enemy, Ivan Moss, played by Bo... See full summary »
Set in 2007, a father and daughter try to discover why the planet has ended up as a polluted cesspool of toxic, corrupting transmissions where its citizens expend terrific energy pursuing ... See full summary »
Based on the turbulent life of the temperamental French painter, Paul Gauguin, and his compulsive search for creative freedom which caused him to abandon his wife and five children in Paris for a life of contentement in Tahiti.
A stranger comes into town and causes a stir when he stands up for the townfolk, in the face of the intimidation tactics from Mayor Howard Baines. The scheming mayor wants to buy up all the... See full summary »
Brother and sister Ninja warriors get revenge for their sister's death by killing the drug dealers in New Orleans. The police enlist the help of a biker warrior to solve the crime. The head... See full summary »
A talented but reckless young longshoreman Sun Chi-Chiang from the wrong side of the docks gets a chance to achieve showbiz stardom as the Krupka-esque 'Thunder King Drummer' with a tip ... See full summary »
Prepare yourself for the all too deadly future. Cash, the heroine of Cyborg 2, is living safe in the free zone. But not for long. Biomechanical problems are taking down her systems and a ... See full summary »
Proxate Corporation recruits a boozy former ship captain and offers him a new identity: Sean Murdoch. His job: to take charge of large ship on one voyage. Once aboard, Murdoch realizes that the ship is a prison ship, and the cargo are criminally insane inmates. Murdoch's other problem: someone has planted bombs aboard the vessel. Murdoch's acrimonious relationship with the prison warden lends extra drama to the story.Written by
Ken Miller <email@example.com>
If Mr Cranky had rated this, I'd be tempted just to copy his review and paste it here. But as he hasn't, I'll have to give it a go myself.
The only thing giving this movie a 1 instead of a 0 is that Malcolm McDowall's acting is excellent. However not even he can save this film from disaster. The director must have been really distracted when he worked on this one because it is just a conglomeration of scenes that were thrown together with very little continuity - reminiscent of bad '70's movies. Even worse, both the actors and director appeared to be making it up as they went along which probably showed how bad the original script was.
It's not even worth discussing the story line although it revolves around a futuristic corporation called the Proxate Corporation who put together a crew of dispensable people to carry a dangerous cargo on an old container/slave ship to Nigeria. This ship's computer is a baby kept in a glass jar and wired into one of the crew via USB 12 or something. The company should have been called the Prostate Corporation as the entertainment value of this movie is on a par with an examination of the same name.
I honestly can't find one scene that I could say was well made and made any real sense in the context of the movie. I only watched it to the end as I had a touch of the bird flu and this movie reminded me that there were people out there who were actually worse off than me - Malcolm McDowall in particular. I won't hold this against him as he's a great actor and every great actor is entitled to one bad movie in their career and this one is a doosie.
So, unless this is the only movie your shop hires out or you're male and you're doctor isn't doing prostate examinations this week and you somehow feel this is a bad thing then give this one a really wide berth unless of course if you're really community minded, buy a copy to support Malcolm and then use it as a drink coaster.
4 of 7 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?
| Report this