Fending off a date rapist
What would you do if you were out on a date and the man you were with tried to rape you? In 2002, more than 70,000 students between the ages of 18 and 24 were victims of alcohol-related sexual assault or date rape. One in three women will be a victim of sexual assault in her lifetime. It's crucial that you know what precautions to take to prevent these kinds of assault and how to respond when a date doesn't take no for an answer. The statistics are staggering. In the United States, a woman is raped approximately every six minutes. If you're being attacked and there is any possibility of escape, go for it! Find the courage to take the risk. In this movie, She Cried No AKA Freshman Fall, D.J. Tanner-Fuller from Full House and it's spinoff, Fuller House (played by Candace Cameron Bure) headed off to college, she was thrilled to be starting out on a new adventure and when she met Zack Morris from Saved by the Bell, and it's prequel, Good Morning, Miss Bliss and it's spinoffs, Saved by the Bell: The College Years and Saved by the Bell: The New Class (played by Mark Paul Glosseaar) at the dorm, not only did they quickly become good friends. D.J. thought he might be the man of her dreams. For their first official date, Zack invited D.J. to a fraternity party. All through the party, he was a perfect gentleman. Then they started drinking beer and jello shooters. Then, Zack took D.J. upstairs to his room and played some music , but things went very differently when they started making out. The 2 started kissing, but a short time later, D.J. started to feel uncomfortable. D.J. tried to defuse the situation by treating it as a joke. But Zack wasn't joking and before D.J. could stop him, he was on top of her. D.J. was terrified but resisted. Before D.J. could react, Zack overpowered her. She tried to fight him off but failed, then he began to rape her. D.J. was in total shock. She couldn't scream. She just shut down. Zack realized D.J. was serious. There'd be no sex. He gave up trying and without a word of apology, he just stood there while she ran off. He seemed genuinely sorry. After being raped by a man she knew, D.J. was completely devasted. For hours, D.J. lay in bed, tired and confused and her mind racing. She couldn't believe what had happened and she didn't think anyone else on campus would believe it either. At first, D.J. didn't tell anyone what had happened. but after a whole month of loneliness and doubt, she told the doctor who advised her to tell her parents. Her parents said D.J. had the option of going to the police. But that was a step she couldn't take just yet. Then she ran into Zack in the hallway. D.J. went to the police who warned her that a rape case would be hard to prove. But D.J. wasn't going to give up now. She went to the dean of students and demanded an on campus trial. The trial found Zack not guilty but D.J. wasn't going to let it stop there. She made a tape of the frat party to prove that Zack. was guilty and his fraternity home was then closed. Date rape remains a wide spread problem across America especially on high school and college campuses. Most date rape victims are between 16 and 19 years old. Don't let it happen to you. There are ways to protect yourself. Remember 3 rules. 1) No means no! Only give your willing consent if you want to have sex. 2) Demand respect and follow through. 3) Be responsible with alcohol. Nothing contributes to date rape with more than drugs or alcohol. One study found alcohol involved in 55% of all sexually aggressive dates. Zack Morris from Saved by the Bell and it's prequel, Good Morning, Miss Bliss and it's spinoffs, Saved by the Bell: The College Years and Saved by the Bell: The New Class (played by Mark Paul Glosseaar) drank beer in the movie, She Cried No AKA Freshman Fall where he attacked D.J. Tanner-Fuller from Full House and it's spinoff, Fuller House (played by Candace Cameron Bure) and he tried to pressure her into drinking jello shooters. Don't go to a bar on a first date and don't go out drinking with any man you don't completely know or trust. Date rapists also use drugs. Rohypnol is the most common. Know what the pill looks like. Rohypnol tablets are white and have a single line across one side and the marking Roche one or Roche 2 on the other side. It has no taste or odor in a drink and can cause blackouts and memory loss. GHB is also used by rapists. In Silencing Mary, Clay Roberts (Josh Hopkins) poured it into Holly Sherman's (Lisa Dean Ryan) cocktail. She got drunk and was raped. She later dropped out of school but her roommate went through some stuff while cleaning their dorm and found the dress she wore that night. She found evidence of rape and brought the police enough evidence to charge Clay. GHB is also known as liquid ecstasy. It is a clear liquid and has a very salty taste. You'd never notice it in a margarita. In small doses, it heightens mood. Larger doses can cause blackouts very quickly, even death. Some bars offer women test strips to detect date rape drugs. Place a few drops of your drink on the strip and wait a minute. The strip will turn blue if it detects GHB or the sedative Ketamin. The strips are not 100% accurate and don't work on wine or fruit juice. Bottom line: Don't accept drinks from strangers and keep an eye on your drink at all times. There are warning signs that your date may become sexually aggressive. Be careful if he's a little too physical. Someone who pokes you with a finger or hugs you when you resist is not being playful. He's trying to dominate you. Aggressive words are indicators too. If he boasts of old sexual conquests or says "You're lucky to be with me.", he wants control, not love. Finally, if he demands to be alone with you too fast and pushes too hard, he could be looking for trouble. At the FBI, we put date rapists into 2 categories. power reassurance rapists are the most common of all sexual predators. We call them gentlemen rapists. During an attack, they think they're making love, pleasing a woman. They don't consider it a crime. Many women have success stopping these guys with firm clear communication, "Back off! I don't want to do this!", "Stop! This is not love, this is rape!" or "I will call the police! You will go to jail!" just like they would if they're attacked by an acquaintance, a child molestor or a spouse. If words don't work, you maybe dealing with the power assertive rapist. He wants power and control over you. He'll use threats or intimidation to get what he wants. You have to fight back much harder just like you would, if attacked by a stranger or 3 Multiples. So, when alone, women should stay away from groups of strangers, especially men that have been drinking. People in groups tend to act more violently, fight the second you sense something is wrong. Scream "get away" or "help" to draw attention to the situation, Tell the assailant you know self-defense and disable your attacker by going for his softest spot-his eyes. He instinctively will try to protect himself-enough time for you to run or drop to the ground, and start kicking using your strongest part of your body-your legs and constantly look for a chance to escape. Tell the police about a sexual assault. Approximately 30% of rapes go unreported; this encourages rapists to think they can get away with it. Report the incident. A power assertive rapist in She Said No named Martin Knapek (Judd Hirsch) tried to force himself on Elizabeth Early (Veronica Hamel). Words wouldn't stop him so after he assaulted her, she called 911 and waited in the phone booth. Police came and arrested him. Women who are date raped often say, "I couldn't believe it was happening. I was caught off guard." Don't let it happen to you. Be careful with alcohol, know the warning signs, know how to say no and don't be afraid to end the date.
- Feb 18, 2008
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