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Episode List


Season 3

21 Sep. 1998
It Takes Two, Baby
Three months later, Annie is visibly pregnant and shamelessly complains, and acts as a tyrant to everyone, especially Eric, except for Ruthie who sympathizes with her pregnancy. Matt has given up on going to an out of state college, but not on moving out, so he accepts an invitation to become three girls' roommate, only to be blamed and expelled for their inability to resist his passive male charms. Lucy wins Mary's dare by snapping up an amazingly mature-built 17 year-old named Jordan. Eric's endless misery trying to follow Annie's inconsistent whims and finding an ...
28 Sep. 1998
Drunk Like Me
Matt has second thoughts about joining a fraternity. Annie buys an old Camaro for Matt and tries to get the family involved in fixing up the car.
5 Oct. 1998
Matt enters a confidence crisis when a girl on campus turns him down for a date, so he asks for 'constructive criticism' at home. Simon feels guilty when Ruthie reacts to his warning that the twin babies will make parental attention scarce. So, she deliberately fails a test to make Annie study with her. Lucy's biology grades are disastrous and according to Mary the bad grades are due to Lucy's new 'best friend' Nicole Jacob. Mary also catches Nicole cutting herself.
12 Oct. 1998
The Legacy
Simon's classmate Mark Huffs's father Carl is stopped by a light push from caring biology teacher Lane to storm at his boy. When Carl complains to the principal, Simon dares only say he didn't get a clear view, then feels morally guilty for not having prevented a fine teacher being suspended, later even dismissed. Eric finds out Carl is a domestic bully and gets Lane reinstated. Matt and his mate Scott misread apparently sexual signals from a teaching assistant, which causes repeated havoc for Matt. Rather then let Annie chose a disastrous 'pregnancy project', Eric ...
19 Oct. 1998
...And a Nice Chianti
To all other Camdens's horror, pigheaded Mary just got her driver's learning permit and is out for miles. Matt initially escapes having to accept a ride, but his 'new' car is stolen by a pregnant girl whose car -actually reported stolen by her parents- he gallantly offered to check on, a story two passing-by cops refuse to believe. Simon takes the school-bus, where seats are reserved by jungle-law, but overplays his hand when offering the chief bully help from apparent 'fellow nerd' Marvin. Lucy gets attention on her bus from cocky Stevie, whose thus dumped girl and ...
2 Nov. 1998
And the Home of the Brave
Preparations for grandpa Charles Jackson's wedding, to be celebrated by Eric on Veterans Day, go as bad as Annie predicted and hoped, albeit for different reasons and everyone ends up reconciled with it and each-other. Matt grudgingly takes flippant Mary on a road-trip, only to find her ignorance as bothersome as a flat. Simon deals with Howie's resurgence. Meanwhile World war II veteran sergeant Millard proves less willing to accept help he qualifies for the extending some to the wedding reception. Lucy is mortally embarrassed when Jordan corrects being presented as ...
9 Nov. 1998
Johnny Get Your Gun
Simon is verbally threatened with gun-violence by Johnny Morton, the just-dumped ex of his new girlfriend Deena Stewart. School regulations don't allow precipitous action, but Eric's police friends cues him the knave has a record, his family a registered gun. Matt is embarrassed with a black eye careless Mary's basketball got him, but his date Shauna's suave brother George Sullivan, who dates Mary, may be really dangerous, as product of a dysfunctional family. Jordan is patient with Lucy's weird idea about 'romantic' slapping.
16 Nov. 1998
No Sex, Some Drugs and a Little Rock 'n' Roll
After drinking Matt's coffee once, Simon fears to be addicted and acts accordingly. A natural, legal 'supplement' is offered to study-exhausted Matt by buddy Scott, whose father got it in a health store, and to Mary by over-competitive teammate Diane Butler, whose father uses it himself. Eric realizes it contains dangerous epinephrine. Eric's former rock band mates visit GlenOak. Matt sets something right. The Butlers are in for a shock.
23 Nov. 1998
Let's Talk About Sex
Simon invests in a babysitting course, but pays dearly when he lets Annie talk him into trying out on Ruthie, who already abused every older sibling even when much younger. Matt desperately seeks inspiration for a college project on sexuality. Wade patiently handles Lucy's insanely jealous and insecure worries after a -for him, unlike Mary, canceled- senior jocks sleepover until Matt comes to her 'rescue', then spontaneously braves Eric. Teenage mothers and (potential) fathers in Eric and Annie's church program go trough surprising hellish moves.
14 Dec. 1998
Here Comes Santa Claus
Like every Christmas, Eric compromises the kids' fun by imposing 'voluntary good deeds' and cheating the draw of the family presents distribution. Matt is even pressed into a mall Santa job, with a jealously rebellious dwarf-size elf. Jordan can't avoid a family event and his gift for Lucy stirs more absurd speculations. Mary felt lucky the soup-kitchen she's pressed into happens to recruit hunky Carlos, a homeless Puerto Rican New Yorker who travels since his home break-up two years ago, but Eric arranges a speedy reconciliation. Simon takes it on himself to save ...
11 Jan. 1999
Nobody Knows...
Simon is deeply hurt because pa didn't tell him his girlfriend Deena behaves so moodily because of her annual leukemia check-up, yet handles her admirably. Matt discovers aunt Julie has moved in town and taken a teaching job. She rudely keeps him and later brother Eric at arms-length, resenting obvious concerns for her alcoholism problem. Fake tears' success on the DMV examiner success inspires Mary to abuse crying regularly, to nobody's ultimate profit.
18 Jan. 1999
All That Jazz
Simon wants to buy the perfect gift for Deena; Lucy's ex-boyfriend is spending time at the Camden's home; Heather is engaged.
25 Jan. 1999
The Tribes That Bind
With the twins birth impending, Eric makes the kids' life miserable by fussing and over-planning, yet blames Matt for preparing the youngsters for what's ahead. Annie adds to the mess by inviting over the Hamiltons, just so Patricia can help her ward off the parish busybodies, who forced a baby-shower on her so they can snoop around the church-owned home. Ruthie acts as if a victim when classmate Bobby points out her underwear visible by failing to wear school-regulation shorts. Her elder siblings are pushed to confront Boby's family, but his brothers aren't only ...
8 Feb. 1999
In Praise of Women
All Eric's planning and fussing proves pretty pointless, with the whole family pacing and worrying in hospital and Annie bitching non-stop, while the animals are left unattended at home. Matt painstakingly works up the courage to donate blood, a phobia. Meanwhile Lucy breaks up with Jordan.
15 Feb. 1999
It Happened One Night
The first weekend all seven siblings are home, Eric and Annie meanly plan to extend their child labor scheme to baby-sitting the ever-noisy baby twins, which only causes misery for the others without yielding sleep for them. Matt even accepted a menial delivery job at the Dairy Shack, but can't stick it out with the owner's son as hostile boss. Simon enjoys ordering there, but Eric even steals from him. Mary slips away to meet Wilson and meanwhile 'non-dates' Jordan, while Lucy can only cover (pointlessly) by doing double chores. Lucy decides to run away, making ...
22 Feb. 1999
Simon hopes to make the school baseball team, but fears nepotism from the coach, so he asks 'sports star' Mary to put in a good word, which gets him stuck with becoming equipment manager. Jimmy Moon's parents consult Eric as he's involved in a marijuana affair with the police and dealer minions. Lucy's unwanted meddling gets her arrested. Matt and his girl Shana desperately try to call, but each time Ruthie deliberately omits passing on their messages, just to steal some sibling attention. Eric's paranoia about a parish conspiracy proves more than pointless.
1 Mar. 1999
Sometimes That's Just the Way It Is
The babies still make all siblings miserable. Simon believes shifting to middle child position ended his luck and resorts to desperate superstitious tricks, even a chain-letter. Matt decides on his own to take military recruitment tests. Lucy and Mary abuse shopping to slip out, and let students Jeff and Chris tempt them to childish pranks while driving. They this bizarrely escape a bad car crash with Ted Grant, who got drunk to celebrate he finally put an end to years of marital misery with freakishly up-tight British wife Emily, who still gets the Camden couple's ...
15 Mar. 1999
We the People
Simon risks losing his paper-route unless he manages to collect the money from scrooge Malone and Mrs. Hinckle suggests how to trap him. Matt's married college president Jack Brenner's reputation is tarnished by at times even violent public controversy over a formally allowed affair with a grad student. Matt's friends and parents get involved including him. Mary bumped into Miles Olsen's car in the school parking lot, but he gets a date with Lucy.
3 May 1999
The Voice
A school janitor claims that God is talking to him. So the school wants him to retire with his pension intact but if he continues to act the way he does, they're ready to dismiss him which means he'll lose his pension. So Eric tries to talk to him but he steadfastly maintains that God is talking to him and that he has a mission.
10 May 1999
All Dogs Go to Heaven
Simon planned a fancy restaurant dinner to celebrate Deena's birthday. When her big brother, college musician Stewart, comes along as chaperone, Lucy all too eagerly accepts his invitation. Matt joins the family cop-friend on nightly patrol and hides to avoid being seen by frat friends. He freaks out when he discovers Mary's kissing her 'movie-date', nice frat-guy Michael Towner, in the police car. Eric promised elderly Burt and Cheryl Carberry to bring their beloved dog 'Mom' to the vet for euthanasia. When he can't bring himself to do so, they end up in the park, ...
17 May 1999
There Goes the Bride: Part 1
The whole Camden family is invited to Matt's deaf ex Heather's wedding to Mason, celebrated by Eric. Matt brings current girlfriend Shana, yet ends up convincing the bride to leave the groom at the altar and drive away together. Wile his ex Lucy flirts with Joe, Jordan gathers the courage to tell her he's dating Mary. Simon is confused after being kissed by Deenah's cahoot.
24 May 1999
There Goes the Bride: Part 2
Matt brings unamused Heather, who hoped he would propose again, back to church, where he exposes after some hesitation groom Mason's flaw, while desperately trying not to lose 'abandoned' Shana. Simon learns the kiss was a 'love test', which is rewarded with more, and Jordan encourages to just enjoy it without excessive worries. Jordan tells Lucy, who out of mere jealousy makes out with wedding guest Joe. Eric has a hard time accepting Julie's sudden announcement to marry Dr. Hank Hastings, but doubts soon shake that couple to be.

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