My So-Called Life

my so-called life is the GREATEST TV show ever made. it's a time capsule, a snapshot of what it was like to be a teenager in the early nineties. claire danes as angela chase is poetic and heartfelt. she goes through struggles that all teenagers go through... feeling alienated, pushing her boundaries, being hopelessly in love with a gorgeous boy...

this show is AMAZING. i've seen every episode twice and i still watch it every night on the N. if you doubt how fully amazing this show is, just watch the end of the episode "self esteem" where jordan realizes he loves angela because she's real and has flaws...then walks across the hall and asks in front of everyone if they can "go somewhere". as they're walking away, he takes her hand. MAGIC!

Remember the first time you said goodbye to someone and you knew you would never, ever see them again? Remember how that felt? If you do, then you know Angela Chase and her family and friends on "My So-Called Life", a simple show about a group of people at a specific time in their lives that is like the fly stuck in amber.

There are only nineteen episodes of this most compelling of programs, then it is done. As the nineteenth episode ends, you are left with a painful feeling deep inside. You have come to care for these people and now they are gone. The next day, the rerun cycle will begin again and you will watch, entranced, as Angela and Rayanne and Rickie and Jordan and Brian and Sharon and Patty and Graham and Danielle travel through the same nineteen hours again, as you sit back, longing for that nineteenth episode to be followed by episode twenty. But it never comes. It's cruel.

"My So-Called Life" is a good argument to never watch television again. And a great argument to say you're glad you did. It's not simply a show about angst-ridden mid-ninetees teens. It's much more.

You owe it to yourself to watch these nineteen episodes, to get a glimpse at what a five-star television series looks like...and how wrong it is when a television network takes it away.

Kudos to all involved.

This series is required viewing.

When seen in order, these 19 episodes form an amazingly rich chronicle of a year in the lives of Angela Chase, her high school friends and the adults in their lives. Writing this great rarely makes it into series television. As disappointing as it was when the show was cancelled after one year, the result was a self-contained almost novelistic tapestry of interwoven stories that stands alone as one of the finest depictions of adolescence and parenthood ever created for the screen.

One of the most distinctive threads that runs through the series is the way both children and adults deceive themselves about what they really want and need out of life. The drama and humor of the series often revolves around the struggle of the different characters to break through to their genuine selves.

Among many fine story lines, one standout is that of Rickie Vasquez, probably the first depiction of a gay teen on series television, and if not the first, certainly the most unapologetic. I could go on way too long about all the other moving, surprising, heartbreaking and ironic story lines, about the way characters are always surprising us with unexpected depths or insights or abilities, about the use of music, about the incredibly honest and unexploitative depiction of teenage sexuality, and about the performances, which are uniformly superb, even in the smallest roles. Best of all the show is so rich and crafted so brilliantly that it rewards repeated viewing.

My So-Called Life was doomed to fail. It was a drama about a teenage girl that wasn't obsessed with the typical things we are told teen girls are overwashed in, like clothing, makeup or boys (well, okay... ONE particular boy)! But this show, in a mere nineteen episodes, managed to run the gamut of topics that all families with kids attending high school in the 1990s were dealing with, and the way the program dealt with these situations was nothing short of perfection.

The Chase family, a mother, father and two daughters in a tree lined suburb of Pittsburgh, PA, are the focus, and Angela is the POV we're seeing the whole thing through (for the most part), as she narrates the story in voiceovers that are both appropriate to her age and yet wise beyond her years. We first meet her at a crossroads: her childhood girlfriend, Sharon is now "not cool enough" for her anymore and she takes up with a wild new pal, Rayanne, and Rayanne's male friend, Rickie where the three of them collectively spend a fair amount of time hanging out in the girl's bathroom at school, swapping mascara pencils and gossiping about the day's events. Right away, the viewer sees this isn't a "typical" teevee take on high school life! Meanwhile, Angela has taken a shine to Jordan, a hunky but reticent classmate that Rayanne and Rickie also both seem enamored over, and that provides a chunk of the drama for her.

But, there were plenty of issues for everyone to go around. Angela also had to deal with the boy next door, Brian, who was the class geek (which show viewers know isn't a fair description for him). Brian (anagram for "Brain") clearly has a thing for Angela ("Angel"), though he might not even be aware of that as the series gets started.

Meanwhile, Graham, Angela's dad, is toying with the idea of an affair, when not considering starting his own business: a restaurant, since he's a chef. Her mom, Patty, has issues because she never knew her birth parents, and gets her obsessive-compulsions from her adoptive mother. Angela's sister Danielle deals with "not being old enough" to participate in a lot of the things her older sib seems steeped in, and that causes strife. Rayanne's mom is an overly permissive sort who allows her daughter to drink alcohol and have parties, which certainly affects Rayanne in notable ways. Rickie is coming to terms with his own sexual identity, and with a dark secret at home. And Jordan's issues are with schoolwork, and with his rock band, Frozen Embryos.

But... what about Tino?

If you only know one fact about this program, know this. My So-Called Life had a cast of characters unlike any in television. You could never pigeonhole any one of them as "good" or "bad," as you saw the three dimensional qualities they all had. That included the narrator, Angela herself! At some point during the 19 hours, you got to see each and every one of these people as a villain, a hero, a fool, but always as a human. To me, that was the true magic of the series. Even characters as minor as a substitute teacher, a principal or a hotelier got this same kind of treatment and I don't think I have ever seen a program, before or since, that has been as even-handed with all of its players as MS-CL was.

Kudos to series creator Winnie Holzman, for making Angela thoughtful, confused and endearing and to Claire Danes who breathed life into the character; to Bess Armstrong, who played Patty so perfectly perfect, though Patty herself managed never to be so; to Devon Odessa and Lisa Wilhoit, who had the thankless roles of the "former" friend and the "annoying" kid sis and both had to make their roles believable and palatable and they both did so, brilliantly; to A.J. Langer, who had most people convinced she actually was Rayanne; to Devon Gummersall, who was literally genius in his role; to Wilson Cruz, who probably had the biggest emotional arc and most challenging acting job of anyone on the show; to Jared Leto who took the bits of dialog he got and made every word count; and to Tom Irwin who was equal parts strong and fragile as the patriarch of the program. Collectively, they were an amazing company.

It's tragic and beautiful that there was only one season of this program. Sure, fans would have loved a second year to find out what might have happened after episode 19, but in a way, perhaps that would have ruined the perception we had; the mystique might have vanished. Still, Angela lives on with her classmates, her family, her situations and just a little bit of magic sprinkled where it completely fit, and that's why My So-Called Life will remain a true television treasure.

If you have never seen this series, I almost envy you in that you have an unexpected joy waiting for you to view. And if you have, you already know and understand everything I've said here. As far as a TV teen drama... no! As far as ANY television drama is concerned: being smart, focused, telling and true, there was none better, and there may never be.

For some reason I keep coming back to this show. Every year I get the shows out and watch them again. Every year I see new things. I understand more. I'm twenty-six now. What's going on?

When you're a teenager, and you have those problems, and you know your friends will make fun of you if you tell them, you look to film, music and TV for answers. Living in England, honest to goodness teen shows are pretty thin on the ground. There's 'Byker Grove', 'Grange Hill' and hints of 'HollyOaks' and that's about it. The trouble is that none of them quite has the audacity or time slot to cut to the heart of what its actually like to be a teenager. Most of the time you have to look to US shows like 'Dawson's Creek' or 'Buffy'. But standing above them all was 'My So-called Life' a television programme that answered all of our questions. When the show was transmitted on our Channel 4 in 1995 it was stupidly popular.

No one had seen anything like this. Suddenly you knew what to do about that older boy or girl you fancy. Or if you have feelings for the girl next door. Or if you weren't sure about your sexuality. Or of someone loved you but you couldn't return their feelings. Or if you got handcuffed to a bed. Your heart was broken by it week after week, but you came back before because you knew it was doing you good. A free hour of therapy with what amounted to being your friends.

Even if you didn't want to admit it, you were one of them. You were Rayanne Graffe, afraid of the world and overcompensating. Sharon Cherski, searching for your own identity beneath the expectations of others. You were Ricki Vasquez unsure who you were but quietly finding an equilibrium. You were Jordan Catalano torn between your friends and something else. You were Brian Krakow, the romantic with so many high expectations of people. You were Danielle Chase, always being kicked out of different rooms. You were Patty Chase fighting to keep your family together. You were Graham Chase fighting to keep yourself together. And you were always Angela, your world falling apart around you, every choice being wrong, every moment a battle, but somehow slowly working it all out.

Then, after nineteen episodes, it was gone. Replaced, I believe, by a rerun of 'Matlock'. The show should never have been cancelled. It wasn't fair goddam it. And not on that cliffhanger. But perhaps it had the right end. The perfect ending. The only ending this show could have had. Making a choice then watching in pain the road not travelled. So like life. So-called Life.

This year we would have had its sixth season. All of the contracts would have been up for renewal. The teenagers would have been twenty something. Characters would have gone, new characters brought in. The writing teams change. But it would not have been the same show.

The show I keep coming back to.