The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (TV Series 1992–2014) Poster

Jay Leno: Himself - Host, Himself, From New York, From Las Vegas, In Las Vegas, Ray Leno, Clay Leno, Dr. Neil Jay Warren, From Chicago, From Chicago:...



  • [about Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers] 

    Jay Leno : She called Bush "the most brilliant man I ever met." This is a woman we're hiring for her *judgment*?

  • Jay Leno : [to Hugh Grant]  What the hell were you thinking?

  • Jay Leno : It was so cold in California today, Scott Peterson has said he's actually looking forward to going to Hell.

  • [about President Bush touring the South after Hurricane Katrina] 

    Jay Leno : He saw something below sea level. Yeah, his approval rating.

  • Jay Leno : [Re: Various things like a jewel-encrusted Mr. Potato Head]  This is why poor countries hate us!

  • Jay Leno : It's so cold in Washington, DC, it took 15 minutes to jump-start Dick Cheney's heart.

  • [on guest Quentin Tarantino] 

    Jay Leno : He's the kind of guy you don't know is drunk until you see him sober.

  • [about embarrassing Presidential relatives] 

    Jay Leno : You know who the embarrassing brother in the Bush family is?

    [Breaks out laughing] 

    Jay Leno : George!

  • [Jay Leno tells a joke about Bush "outsourcing" the presidency] 

    Jay Leno : That seemed kinda mean, didn't it? Who is writing all these Bush jokes? Ellen, put on the camera in the cue card room.

    [switches camera to John Edwards writing monologue cue cards] 

    Jay Leno : Who's writing in there?

    John Edwards : Hey Jay - you do your job, and let me do mine.

  • [on trip to China, guest Liam Neeson spent about $15 on some very cheap watches for his kids] 

    Jay Leno : You cheap bastard.

  • [about all the Hollywood remakes of "King Kong"] 

    Jay Leno : I think it's just a case of monkey see, monkey do.

  • [about the Kansas City Royals, who lost 17 games in row] 

    Jay Leno : It looks like President Bush wasn't the *only* one taking the entire month of August off.

  • Jay Leno : [reading an Ad on "Headlines"]  Men, do you have vaginal dryness?

  • Jay Leno : [doing "Headlines"]  "Organism" can be a tricky word to spell...

  • Jay Leno : [repeatedly, his frequent signature post-punch line]  Exactly!

  • Jay Leno : [during "Headlines", imitating in southern accent ]  Well, looook, here's some suuure fine winder cleaner!

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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