An absolute must see for fans of national treasure Linnea Quigley. How anyone could dislike an entire "movie" devoted to her is beyond me. This is a collection of clips from her films with new segments featuring Linnea showering and working out. It's all sexy fun just like the star. If this doesn't put a smile on your face you might want to check your pulse.
13 Reviews
Carny good times.
BornMatikAgain1 February 2008
Being a fan of Linnea Quigley this was something i needed to see. The 'movie' starts off with Linnea talking about her career and how strange some of her movie choices. then she gets into some stretches. she wearing a studded bra and fish nets. so you know its all about the workout. there's three workout scenes that are tied together with some wrap around stories of her getting hit on by some repulsive caller who Linnea wants to call her later. Or going out for a nice jog to get stalked by a hoard of zombies, which they end up having a pool side workout, which is really funny. then the slumber party workout, with scantily clad women doing very pervocative poses which is all meant for one reason. then you get the great twist at the end.
if you want to throw this on have a few good laughs and watch Linnea dance around id throw it in.
if you want to throw this on have a few good laughs and watch Linnea dance around id throw it in.
Really Campy and Really Fun
horror77776 May 2001
Just picked this rare tape up and I have to say that Linnea Quigley is now up there with my favorite scream queens. She is just as funny in comedy as she is scary in horror! I loved when she worked out with the zombies and when they showed flashbacks to her 80's horror classics (mostly Creepozoids and Nightmare Sisters). Only one question: Why didn't they show live flashbacks of THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD and HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW HOOKERS? I guess they couldn't get the rights... Anyway Linnea shines in every aspect and I LOVED her corny jokes!
Of note though: Do not let your wives or girlfriends catch you watching this tape...you might get dumped...this is for guys only!
***out of****Great humor and FUN to watch!
Of note though: Do not let your wives or girlfriends catch you watching this tape...you might get dumped...this is for guys only!
***out of****Great humor and FUN to watch!
A Mind Numbing and Idiotic Piece of Trash
Scars_Remain6 June 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Try not to see this one. I thought it was going to be good because I'm a fan of cheesy 80's films and I've enjoyed quite a bit of Linnea Quigley's work. I was wrong. I should have said "no" and watched Gigli instead, which is probably a far better film. I guess my biggest problem with this film was its attempt at humor. Nothing about it was funny or even close to funny. The acting is bad, even for the queen of cheesy 80's films. There is no story, just random clips. I guess I shouldn't hate it so much because it was just made as a fun and silly piece but I didn't have any fun and I wasn't entertained once. I even had to fast forward to the ending to get through all of the crap. I'm sorry, but I don't find zombies doing aerobics funny.
I'm honestly not sure what this was supposed to be.
nickjones-9654625 March 2022
It's technically a workout video, but there's no actual instruction. The performers flail around on screen in often seemingly-random ways that are impossible to follow, made even worse by the cinematography and constant cuts.
It's technically a horror video, but it's not frightening at all. The horror creatures are played entirely for comic relief.
It's technically a comedy, but every single attempt at humor is painfully stupid and unfunny.
It's technically a softcore erotic video, but the gyrations of scantily-clad women are far too awkward to be sexy in any way.
So unless this is a masterpiece of experimental filmmaking where I'm missing all of the nuance and subtle philosophy, this amounts to an utterly worthless waste of time.
It's technically a horror video, but it's not frightening at all. The horror creatures are played entirely for comic relief.
It's technically a comedy, but every single attempt at humor is painfully stupid and unfunny.
It's technically a softcore erotic video, but the gyrations of scantily-clad women are far too awkward to be sexy in any way.
So unless this is a masterpiece of experimental filmmaking where I'm missing all of the nuance and subtle philosophy, this amounts to an utterly worthless waste of time.
Zombi-cize!
SykkBoy21 May 2001
I may be a bit biased on this one because I have an autographed copy of the video...
This video is great fun though. I like to pop it in at a party or when the guys are over..it's good, fun, mindless entertainment.
I work out my eyes regularly to this video.
There are some great clips of Linnea's movies as well as cheesy humor and a few exercise sessions.
The opening shower scene is funny as well as hot. It's a great way to start of this video which finishes off funny, with outtakes and goofs.
Not for everyone, but a good party tape.
This video is great fun though. I like to pop it in at a party or when the guys are over..it's good, fun, mindless entertainment.
I work out my eyes regularly to this video.
There are some great clips of Linnea's movies as well as cheesy humor and a few exercise sessions.
The opening shower scene is funny as well as hot. It's a great way to start of this video which finishes off funny, with outtakes and goofs.
Not for everyone, but a good party tape.
A religion
BandSAboutMovies29 October 2022
Warning: Spoilers
In case you ever wonder what life is for and why you're here and get depressed or anxious, worry not. You live in the reality that produced Linnea Quigley and whatever made this all should be thanked. I'm not really religious but if I were to ever start a church, it would probably be one where we all watched this video and just stared at the tracking lines growing around this VHS wonder, a workout tape punctuated by jokes, zombies and synth. I mean, if you want to believe in God, just stare into the eyes of Linnea Quigley, listen to her bubbly voice and watch her kick here legs over her head while working out in a studded bra.
Ken Hall, who directed and wrote this, also made Evil Spawn and The Halfway House. He also made creatures for Critters, Ghoulies, the Bio-Monster in Biohazard, Carnosaur, the creatures in Willy's Wonderland and wrote Dr. Alien and Nightmare Sisters. He's not in the Criterion Collection but belongs somewhere more important, in the video store shelves of our wildest and fondest dreams.
Nobody watches this to work out. I mean, what other exercise video has its host murder every single other woman in it and then threaten you for jerking off to her films? I mean, this starts with a shower scene and ends with Linnea cooking human parts while dressed in lingerie that Frederick's of Hollywood would say is too ridiculous.
Linnea shot this in her parent's house and man, if you don't love her after that, what is wrong with you?
Ken Hall, who directed and wrote this, also made Evil Spawn and The Halfway House. He also made creatures for Critters, Ghoulies, the Bio-Monster in Biohazard, Carnosaur, the creatures in Willy's Wonderland and wrote Dr. Alien and Nightmare Sisters. He's not in the Criterion Collection but belongs somewhere more important, in the video store shelves of our wildest and fondest dreams.
Nobody watches this to work out. I mean, what other exercise video has its host murder every single other woman in it and then threaten you for jerking off to her films? I mean, this starts with a shower scene and ends with Linnea cooking human parts while dressed in lingerie that Frederick's of Hollywood would say is too ridiculous.
Linnea shot this in her parent's house and man, if you don't love her after that, what is wrong with you?
It will really help you out in a bind
jimmyplm26 February 1999
Anyone that likes to exercise their right to look at sexy women will love Linnea's attempt at fitness videos. It is clever and arousing to watch, and there is a zombie scene that is even more enjoyable than the one in Michael Jackson's Thriller video. Fans of Linnea definitely need to check this one out.
Linnea Quigley's finest hour on video
Woodyanders6 May 2008
Warning: Spoilers
This delightfully dippy hour long hoot begins on a rip-roaring note with the always cute'n'spunky Linnea Quigley taking a nice long shower while the camera leers at her luscious naked body. Linnea talks about how hard it is being a scream queen; clips from such flicks as "Creepozoids," "Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-A-Rama," "Assault of the Party Nerds," and "Vice Academy" play as the lovely Ms. Quigley dishes the dirt about her illustrious career. This is followed by Linnea doing aerobics while wearing a metal-studded bra and fishnet stockings. Linnea then goes jogging and runs across a bunch of zombies who look like they stumbled off the set of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video. Linnea informs the zombies that they're all out of shape and gets them to do a strenuous workout session in front of a pool. Ms. Quigley invites four hottie gal pals over for a slumber party and they all watch a clip from "Nightmare Sisters." Of course, Linnea and her yummy lingerie-clad buddies then all do various exercises to stay fit and healthy. A crazed psycho in a Ronald Reagan mask shows up to viciously bump off Linnea's friends in assorted gory ways. Writer/director Kenneth J. Hall has a grand campy time poking fun at tacky celebrity workout videos and cheesy horror movies alike (the false cat scare joke is especially funny). Linnea looks great as usual and cheerfully sends up her own schlock fright flick scream queen persona to the ninth degree. John Vulich's funky syncopated score really does the trick. Moreover, we're treated to some hilarious out takes at the end and there's even a brilliant surprise twist concerning the killer's actual identity. This sensationally silly riot would make for an ideal companion feature to the equally awesome "Scream Queen Hot Tub Party."
Entertaining satire of those Jane Fonda (and imitators) exercise tapes
lor_14 May 2023
My review was written in May 1990 after watching the program on Cinema Home Video cassette.
A cute satire of exercise videos, this horror-themed tape boasts the luscious Linnea Quigley (before she dropped her last name from her billing) but runs a good gag into the ground.
Opener is a tantalizing shower scene with Linnea, the the tape segues to a 10-minute segment of film clips from her B-picture videos like "Creepozoids" and "Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama", mostly made by the show's executive producer David DeCoteau.
Quigley leads the viewer in various stretching and aerobic exercises, but the gimmick is that monsters or slashers attack, cueing interesting makeup effects. Unfortunately, the tedium of the exercise routines is retained along with the satire.
One imaginative segment has her out jogging, pursued by a horde of zombies who rise up out of a cemetery. When they get her cornered by a swimming pool, Linnea yells "You're a mess!" and leads them in comical exercise routines.
Another highlight is a slumber party with pretty young starlets joining the star in aerobics and watching tv. Identity of the maniacal slasher wearing a Ronald Reagan mask is easy to guess.
Show ends with outtakes. Shot of a clapperboard reveal the pseudonymous director as Kenneth J. Hall, helmer of the horror video "Evil Spawn".
A cute satire of exercise videos, this horror-themed tape boasts the luscious Linnea Quigley (before she dropped her last name from her billing) but runs a good gag into the ground.
Opener is a tantalizing shower scene with Linnea, the the tape segues to a 10-minute segment of film clips from her B-picture videos like "Creepozoids" and "Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama", mostly made by the show's executive producer David DeCoteau.
Quigley leads the viewer in various stretching and aerobic exercises, but the gimmick is that monsters or slashers attack, cueing interesting makeup effects. Unfortunately, the tedium of the exercise routines is retained along with the satire.
One imaginative segment has her out jogging, pursued by a horde of zombies who rise up out of a cemetery. When they get her cornered by a swimming pool, Linnea yells "You're a mess!" and leads them in comical exercise routines.
Another highlight is a slumber party with pretty young starlets joining the star in aerobics and watching tv. Identity of the maniacal slasher wearing a Ronald Reagan mask is easy to guess.
Show ends with outtakes. Shot of a clapperboard reveal the pseudonymous director as Kenneth J. Hall, helmer of the horror video "Evil Spawn".
Linnea Quigley's Horror Workout (1990)
jonahstewartvaughan15 January 2024
Warning: Spoilers
Cult Cuts Volume 49 (Return to the Video Store: The Undefined Part Two)
#3/4: Linnea Quigley's Horror Workout (1990)
(8/10): A fun, simple, silly and sexy satire that is hosted by one of the Quintessential Scream Queens, Linnea Quigley.
It starts with Quigley in a gratuitous shower scene, then she gets attacked by an unknown assailant in a freeze frame when she gets out. This leads into her in a skimpy outfit in front of the tv recalling her past films and then breaking into a stretching session as she then takes you through her usual routine.
She then starts a jog through the town and then turns into the local cemetery where, unbeknownst to her the dead come out of their graves. When she finally finds out she begins to criticize their lack of self care and how they let themselves go, so she begins to make them do an extensive dance routine in front of the pool which she ends by ultimately tricking them into all jumping in.
She then has some friends over for a slumber party and we now have more girls in skimpy outfits that do more routines and eventually the girls begin to be picked off by a killer, but once it reaches the end it's revealed that it's Linnea, who then criticizes the viewer for what they are "doing" while watching her movies.
Clocking in at just about an hour long, this little fun parody of Workout videos is loaded with everything that you would want in a Linnea Quigley Flick; Boobs, Blood and Cheap Fun.
Quigley is also, as usual, filled with energy and enthusiasm as well as some charisma that makes this low budget riff worth watching.
The costumes are solid and even though one could dismiss parts of it as filler as it's essentially clips and photos from her previous films, it's more like reminiscing about those times and kinda poking fun at them in the process.
This is one of those Straight to Video flicks that was a rental favourite amongst fans of Quigley, and is one that anyone who is a fan of hers should take a look into.
#3/4: Linnea Quigley's Horror Workout (1990)
(8/10): A fun, simple, silly and sexy satire that is hosted by one of the Quintessential Scream Queens, Linnea Quigley.
It starts with Quigley in a gratuitous shower scene, then she gets attacked by an unknown assailant in a freeze frame when she gets out. This leads into her in a skimpy outfit in front of the tv recalling her past films and then breaking into a stretching session as she then takes you through her usual routine.
She then starts a jog through the town and then turns into the local cemetery where, unbeknownst to her the dead come out of their graves. When she finally finds out she begins to criticize their lack of self care and how they let themselves go, so she begins to make them do an extensive dance routine in front of the pool which she ends by ultimately tricking them into all jumping in.
She then has some friends over for a slumber party and we now have more girls in skimpy outfits that do more routines and eventually the girls begin to be picked off by a killer, but once it reaches the end it's revealed that it's Linnea, who then criticizes the viewer for what they are "doing" while watching her movies.
Clocking in at just about an hour long, this little fun parody of Workout videos is loaded with everything that you would want in a Linnea Quigley Flick; Boobs, Blood and Cheap Fun.
Quigley is also, as usual, filled with energy and enthusiasm as well as some charisma that makes this low budget riff worth watching.
The costumes are solid and even though one could dismiss parts of it as filler as it's essentially clips and photos from her previous films, it's more like reminiscing about those times and kinda poking fun at them in the process.
This is one of those Straight to Video flicks that was a rental favourite amongst fans of Quigley, and is one that anyone who is a fan of hers should take a look into.
Sexy, Bloody, Hilarious!
robbiejay19785 May 2003
Linnea Quigley is one of the sexiest girl's around, and in the 80's if you wanted trashy, sexy, funny good times you got a Linnea movie. This movie is a tribute to Linnea and most of her films, as well a hilarious workout video that borders on erotic. 4 stars! Plus it has a slumber party scene and working out with the living dead how cool is that!
A Nude Linnea....What Else Do You Need?
Michael_Elliott30 October 2012
Linnea Quigley's Horror Workout (1990)
** 1/2 (out of 4)
Whereas BILLY THE KID VS. Dracula was one of the drive-in eras biggest cult favorites, this thing here has to be one of the crowning achievements of the VHS era. I'm sure anyone who grew up in the 80s remember the days when you'd walk into your local shop and never know what new, weird title you'd find on the shelf.
We all know that Linnea Quigley was one of the biggest stars of the VHS days and this here has to be her most outrageous film. Part documentary, part workout video and part slasher, this film offers up quite a bit in its 61-minute running time but without a doubt the main reason it was made is so that her fans could see her naked (again). Basically we start off with Quigley talking to the camera and then going through some of her movie clips. From here she shows us her workout, which leads her to going for a job when she's attacked by zombies. She's worried about the "shape" that the zombies are in so she leads them on an exercise. Later, after another workout, Quigley and her girlfriends are stalked by a psycho.
Anyone who would actually take this film serious are certainly watching the wrong movie. I think as long as you come into this thing with an open mind then you should be able to have some fun with it. Quigley is certainly attractive enough to where it's easy to just look at her beautiful body but she's also quite charming here and manages to be very funny as well (especially during a "stretch your muscle" joke). The zombie scene is funny in its own way and the slasher segment also does a nice job at spoofing the type of horror films that were being released during this period. At just 61-minutes I will admit that the workout stuff gets a little dragged out a bit but there's still no question that fans of Quigley will enjoy watching this.
** 1/2 (out of 4)
Whereas BILLY THE KID VS. Dracula was one of the drive-in eras biggest cult favorites, this thing here has to be one of the crowning achievements of the VHS era. I'm sure anyone who grew up in the 80s remember the days when you'd walk into your local shop and never know what new, weird title you'd find on the shelf.
We all know that Linnea Quigley was one of the biggest stars of the VHS days and this here has to be her most outrageous film. Part documentary, part workout video and part slasher, this film offers up quite a bit in its 61-minute running time but without a doubt the main reason it was made is so that her fans could see her naked (again). Basically we start off with Quigley talking to the camera and then going through some of her movie clips. From here she shows us her workout, which leads her to going for a job when she's attacked by zombies. She's worried about the "shape" that the zombies are in so she leads them on an exercise. Later, after another workout, Quigley and her girlfriends are stalked by a psycho.
Anyone who would actually take this film serious are certainly watching the wrong movie. I think as long as you come into this thing with an open mind then you should be able to have some fun with it. Quigley is certainly attractive enough to where it's easy to just look at her beautiful body but she's also quite charming here and manages to be very funny as well (especially during a "stretch your muscle" joke). The zombie scene is funny in its own way and the slasher segment also does a nice job at spoofing the type of horror films that were being released during this period. At just 61-minutes I will admit that the workout stuff gets a little dragged out a bit but there's still no question that fans of Quigley will enjoy watching this.
See also
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