OK, look. In my opinion, there are five catagories of horror films.
GRADE A - These are films like "The Exorcist," "Silence of the Lambs," "The Shining," "Rosemary's Baby," etc. They are usually bigger budget horror films that have managed to escape the giant cookie cutter of Hollywood due to such visionaries as Stanley Kubrick and Roman Polanski.
GRADE B - These are lower budget films like "Halloween," and "Night of the Living Dead." The good ones work because they are directed by such visionaries as John Carpenter and George Romero.
GRADE C - These can be either big budget or low budget. Most of them suck big time, but once in a while a "guilty pleasure" comes along like The Howling," "Texas Chainsaw Massacre," or "The Evil Dead 2." In other words, no one is saying they're great films, but there is enough originality and/or inspired lunacy to make it worthwhile.
GRADE D - Trash filmmaking. Films like "Leprechaun," "Witchboard 5," "Puppet Master," etc etc. These are just plain bad films, but they defy criticism because there is an audience out there who just like to watch people die.
GRADE Z - These are usually straight to video films with the word "zombie" or "blood" in the title." I don't typically watch Grade D or Z movies, but apparently many people do.
"Scarecrows" is a Grade Z movie disguised as a Grade D movie. It's got high enough production values to manage a D rating, but the story, characters, pacing, direction, and special effects are strictly Grade Z.
I saw several good reviews of this movie on IMDB and hoped that maybe I'd discovered a rare gem. I'm always optimistic about finding a new discovery like the original "Ring" from Japan, or the underrated "Dogs of War" from England.
Believe me, folks. "Scarecrows" ain't no gem.
I personally found the film to be unwatchable. About half way through, I stared to fast forward through parts. It was THAT awful...and worse, BORING.
I've seen better character motivation and acting on UPN sitcoms and the story is thinner than Bruce Willis' hair. Actually, there IS no story. It's just a bunch of alleged paramilitary types running around...talking a lot (with amateurish dialogue)...and getting killed by stuntmen dressed like high-school-production scarecrows.
These filmmakers don't understand any of the rules of horror. There is no BUILD of suspense. There are no characters to invest in. There is nothing to interest you except the anticipation of the credits rolling at the end.
If you like amateurish movies, with shoddy production values, uninspired direction, and zero plot, then by all means watch this film.
But for those of you who truly appreciate a good horror film, go rent something you've already seen twice before. Actually go watch some paint dry or grass grow. I guarantee it will be more interesting than this stinker.
