Lance Kinsey: Proctor
Proctor : Gee, sir, I thought you could only get contempt of court for opening your mouth!
Capt. Thaddeus Harris : Proctor, this is an alley.
Proctor : I know sir but these are the directions Mahoney gave me.
Capt. Thaddeus Harris : Mahoney?
Proctor : Yes he says this restaurant has the best salad bar in town.
Capt. Thaddeus Harris : Well it damn sure better have!
[they go inside]
Capt. Thaddeus Harris : Proctor, I don't see a salad bar.
Proctor : [sees the name of the restaurant, "The Blue Oyster"] Look sir. Maybe they serve seafood.
Capt. Thaddeus Harris : Not funny you idiot!
Zed : [teaching a class to the cadets] Cadets, I'd like now to discuss with you something that will be vital for you to know when you're, like, out there on the job as a police officer, and that's the correct way on how to eat a doughnut. A doughnut...
Proctor : [enters the classroom] Attention!
[the cadets stand up at attention]
Proctor : Captain Harris?
[Capt. Harris enters wearing a medical device with his hands suspended in the air not long after Zed switched Harris' Right Guard deodorant spray with a can of Mace, which the latter burned Harris' armpits]
Captain Harris : [to the cadets] From this moment on, anyone who misplaces their canister of Mace will reprimanded and fined. Is that clear?
Cadets : [in unison] YES, SIR!
[Harris and Proctor leaves]
Zed : Bye.
[after the Citizens On Patrol team accidentally foil a police sting operation, they're met with an angry Capt. Harris and sidekick Lt. Proctor, the former also delighted that his plan to make the program fail succeeded]
Captain Harris : [furious; to Mahoney, the trainers, and the downtrodden civilian recruits] Three months' work out the window, down the drain. Your Citizens on Patrol just screwed up the single biggest police undercover sting operation
Captain Harris : in the HISTORY OF THIS CITY!
Proctor : Tell 'em the good news, sir.
Captain Harris : Thank you, Proctor.
Proctor : You're welcome, sir.
Captain Harris : As of now, the C.O.P. program is suspended, pending a full investigation.