Short Circuit (1986)

G.W. Bailey: Skroeder

Quotes 

• Howard Marner : Crosby, what's it gonna do?

  Newton Crosby : Howard it's hard to say, it's malfunctioning, it may not do anything.

  Skroeder : But it COULD decide to blow away anything that moves, couldn't it? COULDN'T IT CROSBY?

• Skroeder : ...and I'm going to need some Hueys.

  Howard Marner : Some what?

  Skroeder : HELICOPTERS, Howard. Jesus Christ!

  Howard Marner : I thought they were choppers.

  Skroeder : Well, now they're called Hueys.

  Howard Marner : Well, why wasn't I notified?

• Skroeder : What the hell does it need input for?

  Newton Crosby : I don't know; I guess it can't triangulate its position.

  Howard Marner : That's a simple function.

  Newton Crosby : Can you triangulate YOUR position, Howard?

  Howard Marner : No.

  Newton Crosby : Well, then - there you go!

• Ben Jabituya : "Unable. Malfunction."

  Howard Marner : How can it refuse to turn itself off?

  Skroeder : Maybe it's pissed off.

  Newton Crosby : It's a machine, Schroeder. It doesn't get pissed off. It doesn't get happy, it doesn't get sad, it doesn't laugh at your jokes.

  Newton Crosby , Ben Jabituya : [in unison]  It just runs programs.

  Howard Marner : It usually runs programs.

• [after Number 5 is seemingly destroyed] 

  Skroeder : [cheerfully]  Now that, my friend, is how you kick ass!

  Howard Marner : Years of research are down the tubes, and you're happy as a pig in slops.

  Skroeder : [proudly]  Just doing my job, sir.

  Howard Marner : Maybe from now on you can do it somewhere else.

• Skroeder : [after watching Crosby disassemble Number 5]  What the hell is the matter with you, you four-eyed idiot?

  Newton Crosby : [mumbling to himself]  What an asshole.

  Skroeder : [angrily]  I heard that!

• Newton Crosby : Let me tell you something. I don't like those NOVA guys any more than you do. In fact, I don't care if they ever get Number 5 back. But I wanna see it.

  Stephanie Speck : If I show you where he is, do I have your word: You will not experiment on him, you will not flip the switches, and you will not take him apart?

  Newton Crosby : Absolutely. You have my word.

  Stephanie Speck : Okay. He's out back. I'll take you to him.

  Skroeder : [walks up to them]  Well, while you're at it, young lady, you can take me, too.

  Newton Crosby : [surprised]  Skroeder!

  Skroeder : Terrific job, Crosby. Thanks for the help.

  Newton Crosby : No. I had nothing to do with this!

  Stephanie Speck : You bastard! You're a liar!