A top secret Agent is murdered, so his estranged son, a high school gymnast, teams up with his dad's attractive female partner to stop the psychopathic hermaphroditic gang leader who killed him, and now plans a major terrorist attack.
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Title: Never Too Young to Die (1986)
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Cast
| Cast overview, first billed only: | |||
| John Stamos | ... | Lance Stargrove | |
| Vanity | ... | Danja Deering | |
| Gene Simmons | ... | Carruthers / Velvet Von Ragner | |
| George Lazenby | ... | Drew Stargrove | |
| Peter Kwong | ... | Cliff | |
 |
Ed Brock | ... | Pyramid |
| John Anderson | ... | Arliss | |
| Robert Englund | ... | Riley | |
| Tara Buckman | ... | Sacrificed Punkette | |
| Curtis Taylor | ... | Barton | |
|
|
Jon Greene | ... | Coach Madsen |
| Tim Colceri | ... | Grady | |
| John Miranda | ... | Mr. Wilder | |
| Patrick Wright | ... | Exploding Biker | |
| Gary Kasper | ... | Wrestler (as Gary F. Kasper) | |
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Plot Summary
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Add Synopsis
Storyline
Velvet Von Ragner is a powerful murderous psychopathic gang leader, but also a hermaphrodite who prides himself of being both a man and a woman. He's holding a gang rally where he announces his plans to poison the water supply and pipeline of a major US city. However, top US secret agent and double O counterpart Drew Stargrove steals a key component he needs to pull this off. After an action packed shoot out, Stargrove is surrounded and although he puts up a good fight, he's eventually killed by Von Ragner. However, the component is not on him. Meanwhile, his estranged son Lance, a talented high school gymnast, receives the word of his father's death. As part of their denial protocol, the government claims that he's been killed in a car accident, which Lance doesn't buy. Lance notices that part of his inheritance is a farm he never knew his father had, so he goes there to check it out. The only person living there turns out to be Danja Deering, a beautiful female spy, who worked with ...
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He inherited all his father's enemies and only one of his friends. See more »Parents Guide:
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Details
Country:
USALanguage:
EnglishRelease Date:
17 July 1986 (West Germany) See more »Also Known As:
Lance - Stirb niemals jung See more »Edit
Box Office
Budget:
$3,000,000 (estimated)Opening Weekend USA:
$46,500, 18 June 1986, Limited ReleaseCompany Credits
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Technical Specs
Runtime:
Sound Mix:
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Color (Metrocolor)
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Riley: I'd say WORSE!
See more »
Performed by Tommie Lee Bradley
Produced by Iren Koster, Chip Taylor, Ralph Lane
Written by Chip Taylor, Ralph Lane, Michael Kingsley, and Iren Koster
1986 Paul Music
See more »
Did You Know?
Trivia
Velvet Von Ragner's band in the club scene was made up of actual transvestites who gave Gene Simmons pointers on how to play Ragner. See more »Quotes
Velvet Von Ragnar: [regarding the formula with which they'll poison Los Angeles's water supply, unless the Governor of California meets their demands] ... Is the concentration LETHAL?Riley: I'd say WORSE!
See more »
Connections
Referenced in Best of the Worst: Deadly Prey, Hard Ticket to Hawaii, and Miami Connection (2013) See more »Soundtracks
STARGROVEPerformed by Tommie Lee Bradley
Produced by Iren Koster, Chip Taylor, Ralph Lane
Written by Chip Taylor, Ralph Lane, Michael Kingsley, and Iren Koster
1986 Paul Music
See more »
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Many films fall into that 'so-bad-they're-good' category. The guys at Troma have even made it a revered art form. But Troma has yet to match "Never Too Young to Die." Without realising it, the filmmakers have achieved the ultimate tacky 80's action movie. It has just a perfect balance of tacky 80's acting (with "Jessie" from "Full House," Gene Simmons from KISS, and Vanity--what ever happened to her?), tacky 80's action, tacky 80's music, and tacky 80's production design. The plot is the most convoluted mess I've ever seen. That is to say that there really is a plot, but you find yourself smacking your forehead repeatedly in disbelief as the writers juggle tacky 80's clichés, predictable plot turns, and convenient situations that no one would ever buy. And sometimes, it just doesn't make any sense at all. But when all is said and done, the final product is a movie that is just delightfully crappy. My suggestion: rent this movie with some friends and some booze, and have a rollicking good time bashing this movie. I give it a 0 for its poor quality and a 10 for its "entertainment" value. Total score: 5