Cobra (1986) Poster

(1986)

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10/10
Stallone's 80's best underrated Action Horror film Cobra!
ivo-cobra86 October 2015
My favorite best Stallone action movie. But from the 80's that Stallone made action films is the first stand alone film not meaning Rocky and Rambo. Cobra will never stop been my favorite best action movie horror thriller from the 80's that is out there. It is one of my personal favorite movies. I wish only the movie wouldn't be that short but still it was directed by George P. Cosmatos who directed Rambo this movie was made right after Rambo: First Blood Part II was released.

Cobra is also a Cannon film and one of the best action horror thrillers that is out there. Cobra simply rocks! And it is a highly entertaining underrated action flick that guarantees the viewer a great show. Cobra is another one of those movies. It's not deep, it has a social message but doesn't really care about it. Its just pure old fun. The night slasher kills people randomly. He targets anyone, anywhere. The police don't have a clue, they can't stop him, all they can do is wait for the next death. But that all changes when Ingrid gets a good clear look at the chief of the gang. Yes, it's not one person, it's a group of killers that have set their minds on hunting the weak of society. Now they'll do anything to kill the only witness, the woman that can finish their 'dream' but they didn't count on one man: Marion Cobretti.

The movie plays with the idea that murderers use the system to get away with their crimes. It explores the fear in society, the impotence of the courts and introduces Cobretti, a cop who doesn't care about the law only his justice. Although I don't agree with this I still enjoyed the movie since Stallone didn't spend much time making his point, rather went fast for the action.

YOU'RE THE DISEASE, AND I'M THE CURE!!!!!!!!

Cobra is a 1986 American action film directed by George P. Cosmatos, and written by Sylvester Stallone, who also starred in the title role. The film co-stars Reni Santoni, Brigitte Nielsen and Andrew Robinson. The film received negative reviews, with much criticism focused on the overuse of genre tropes, yet it debuted at the number one spot on the U.S. box office and became a financial success.

The film was loosely based on the novel Fair Game by Paula Gosling, which was later filmed under that title in 1995. However, Stallone's screenplay was originally conceived from ideas he had during pre-production of Beverly Hills Cop, whose screenplay he heavily revised. He had wanted to make Beverly Hills Cop a less comedic and more action-oriented film, which the studio rejected as being far too expensive. When he left that project, Eddie Murphy was brought in to play the lead role

A tough-on-crime street cop must protect the only surviving witness to a strange murderous cult with far reaching plans. The cult and their leader The Night Slasher are killing people all over the town in Los Angeles for believing in their New World so that will the strongest people survived but their is one tough cop that stands in their way and he must protect a surviving witness that cab identify the Slasher. I seriously love this film from the 80'a and I wish there would be more films like this. The Action sequences, the explosion, death scenes are fantastic after Rambo here comes Cobra.

Is one of my best Stallone Action movies beside Tango & Cash (1989), Rambo, Rocky, Cliffhanger, Demolition Man and The Specialist it is one of my favorite action movies of all time! 10/10 Grade: Bad Ass Seal Of Approval
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beautiful script!
senin77720 November 2000
I'm very bad in english, i'm from Russia. But I'm fun of Stallone and don't keep silently. This film - classics! It don't have spare! All in it working for result. It's action in last type. In Russia, we have saying: all genius - simply. It's about this film. "Cobra" - as your picture at the wall - nice for your eyes. Sorry for my bad english! Now I'm go to gim - i want to be strong as Cobretti. Arnold and Van Damm, and Sigal - stupid before Stallone! They never made such beautiful script!
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10/10
SYNOPSIS: It made me want to kick my own *ss.
rootbeerbrains7 January 2005
YOU CAN'T TELL ME the first time you saw Stallone do a complete 180 in that pimped out ride, hang that sweet lookin' gun out of the window, and knock off a few caps at the bad guy as he drove in REVERSE (!!) that you didn't get a little tingly in your gut in a good way.

People... I think we need to have a Come-To-Jesus about this movie. I can't believe I actually saw such low approval stats from all age brackets. Lemme just holler and the children of the '80s: what the hell are you thinking? Stallone and Schwartzenegger were bigger than life back then, and there's no love.... Now there's nothing but CGI, bigger explosions, crazier guns, fake boobies, more authentic-looking aliens, all the things I like in movies -- wait a second.

You know, I realize Stallone will never win Best Actor... I realize Stallone will never die, probably, he's always in such damn good shape... and I also realize that his face will never straighten up so he can talk correctly, but there's one thing I do know... I give this movie a 10, and I hope it feels like the giant peanut butter sandwich you just ate without a glass of milk anywhere in sight!

I need a glass of rootbeer... BARTENDER!
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10/10
80's entertainment at it's best
Cobretti_198617 June 2003
First of all....to all the people who bash this film, I have one question for you. Did you see the cover? If after seeing the cover, Stallone with sunglasses an Uzi in his hand and a match in his mouth, and you still rented this and hated it you deserve what you get. If you want to watch "Masterpiece Theater" and pretend not to be bored then go ahead. Leave action movies for the fans of the genre.

This movie doesn't pretend to be anything that it's not. It's a violent, campy, 80's Stallone vehicle that is a lot of fun.

Cobra is a cool character with catchy one liners and an awesome 50 Merc Coup. He wears sunglasses and a match in his mouth. A rouge cop who works the zombie squad and is a lonely guy until he meets an aspiring model who he's been hired to protect.

If you dont like Stallone then this film will not change you're mind.

4 **** stars

Ps. The movie is an editing masterpiece. Edited by Don Zimmerman who edited "Being There"
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10/10
One of my favorite movies
tp3204 March 1999
Let me start by saying that I fully understand all the people who hate this film. After all, it is a violent, often extremely stupid macho-actioner which falls apart if you start to think it's contents for a second. Its characters are one-dimensional and there's really not much plot or dialogue. But while many others think of the above as a bad thing, I think I've just described the recipe for a perfect action film.

I recently watched "Vampires" on DVD and listened to John Carpenter's commentary and one comment amused me. When James Woods and his crew were outside a building supposedly filled with vampires, everyone was wearing vests and neckpieces which protected them from being bitten except James Woods and Carpenter said about this something like "You can see how everyone is wearing vests except James Woods because he's so tough". Such is the case with Cobra also. All the other cops are dressed like...well, cops, but Stallone, he really stands out from the crowd in a positive way with his tight jeans, T-shirts, a pair of really cool (and very 80s) sunglasses and a match in his mouth (which I thought was a very nice touch). And why does he look like this? You guessed it - because he's so tough.

As I said before, there's not much plot and what there is, is pretty stupid and generic. We have seen it many times before and we will (I hope!) see it many times in the future but hey, if it ain't broken, why fix it? Of course there are several people who think it has always been broken.. There are some sequences and dialogue in Cobra which are almost embarrassingly stupid such as the opening shot where the team of killers are weaving axes to the air and then there are the legendary lines "The court is civilized, isn't it...pig?" "But I'm not.. This is where the law stops..and I start..sucker!" but I'm just so glad that they included these scenes (even though they probably knew that the critics wouldn't like them) because they are my favorite scenes in the movie.

This is a movie which has a very, very specific target audience and the reason for all the bad reviews is probably the fact that unlike other movies like this, this was for some reason targeted to a wider audience and of course, many people didn't like it. Not because Cobra is a bad movie but because they just don't like films like this. Surprisingly the other movie which was also based on Paula Gosling's novel, the William Baldwin-Cindy Crawford -actioner "Fair Game" suffered the same fate. Needless to say, I also liked that film a lot.

I know most people don't like the movies that I like and that's OK but I want others to know that I personally have seen probably over a thousand action movies and this is one of my all-time favorites and that there are many, many others who have truly enjoyed Cobra and it has become a cult classic to action fans worldwide. And when everyone starts to really think about it, Cobra may just be the perfect movie. There are so many films made in the 90s which are OK. They are not great but they don't suck either. Cobra, however, has all the ingredients that action fans love and others hate. It doesn't leave anyone cold, you either love it or you hate it. But I'll say this: If you like films like "Schindler's List" or "Shakespeare in Love" and you rent a film with a tagline "Crime is a disease. Meet the cure. COBRA", you truly deserve what you see!

Cobra is an excellent action movie because of a great macho performance (I loved the deep voice!) and screenplay from Stallone, a truly phenomenal score from my favorite composer Sylvester Levay, tight editing by Don Zimmerman and good cinematography by Ric Waite (who was also the director of photography in my other favorite, "Marked for Death" starring Steven Seagal). I also praise the director, George P. Cosmatos, although I haven't liked his other movies as much as this.

Anyway, the name and the tagline really says it all. You're either going to love or hate this and all I can say is, if you look for any intelligence in a movie, don't see it. I do, but not in an action movie. Actually, I don't even want action films to be smart or sophisticated. For me, Cobra delivers! I give it a full 10/10.
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8/10
Revenge of the 80's: Sylvester Stallone's hey days!
Joseph P. Ulibas26 September 2004
Cobra (1986) was one of the many star vehicles that showcased Sly Stallone. This happens to be one of his better ones. The cheese and sleaze factor hits the roof in this one as Stallone stars as maverick cop Cobratti (his first name is pretty silly and has to be heard). A group of underground psychos are brewing and have formed a cult of killing machines. Meanwhile a model (Brigitte Nielsen) has been marked for death after escapes from one of their minions clutches. It's up to Cobratti and his cop buddy (Reni Santori) to topple this blood thirsty cult. But can they do it?

I happen to enjoy this movie, it's so cheesy and sleazy and impossible not to like! Stallone mumbles and grunts his way through the film whilst Ms. Nielsen is nothing more than eye candy. Reni Santori mugs for the camera and does his best to deliver his goofy and inane dialog as the movie's designated comic relief. He also has bad timing in these movies because something always happens to him. The villains are pretty straight forward sweaty and delusional psychos who need to learn some basic manners.

If you like cheesy action movies with heavy doses of sleaze, this one's a sure winner. But if you're looking for something serious or poignant, look elsewhere because you ain't going to find it here!

Highly recommended!
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Very Underrated
vandammekick2 August 2003
This film deserves much more credit than it has received. Stallone is looking great with tight jeans and stubble chewing on a matchstick which comes in handy in the final bloodshed showdown. Stallone plays Marion Cobretti in a superb action packed thriller filled with one liners in a funny relationship with his partner played by Reni Santoni, sexual tension with his female witness in protective custody played by his then wife Brigitte Nielsen and a raging fury from Stallone intent on eliminating the ruthless killers headed by Brian Thompson (Arnold Schwarzenegger rips his heart out in The Terminator and Jean-Claude Van Damme knocks him out with one kick in Lionheart). These people mean business and Andrew Robinson (Scorpio in Dirty Harry) thinks that a subtle solution can easily be thought of to take them out but it is only Stallone's violent tactics that can ultimately save the day. Essentially Rambo with a badge with the heart of Rocky. Stallone fans will be very pleased in a film that combines all areas of cinema, not just action. Comedy, romance and a great cast complement this already excellent film that Stallone has written which incorporates material from Beverly Hills Cop when he was meant to play Axel Foley. Better that Eddie Murphy Played it because Stallone has a chance to make this two years on. Trivia: Eddie Murphy looks at the Cobra poster in Judge Reinhold's bedroom in Beverly Hills Cop II that Brigitte Nielsen is also in. If you like the Dirty Harry films, Steven Seagal cop films and a Stallone fan in general this is a great film with an excellent soundtrack. Talking of Steven Seagal and soundtrcks, on the trailer for Seagal's Marked For Death it features "Chase", a Sylvester LeVay track from Cobra.
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7/10
Where Rambo stops, Cobra Begins
Cobra200315 September 2003
With two Rambo movies, First Blood (1982) and Rambo : First Blood part II (1985) under his commando belt, Sylvester Stallone had confidently confirmed himself as the Box Office king of the Action Thriller genre. With all the gingoism and American flag waving that went with the comic strip adventures of the worlds favourite fictional viet nam vet, Stallone steps up a gear into Cobra (1986), one of the tightest, exciting, well written and under-rated action movies of the past few decades. Stallone takes British crime novelette Running Duck (US - Fair Game} from celebrated writer Paula Gossling and gives it the full Rambo gloss treatment. Gone from the novel is the alcoholic schizoid lead character and in his place is Marion Cobretti, the typical, four square Stallone character, and the story is all the better for this. Stallone' screenplay is pretty simple, and so is the under lying message that evil is a force that must be met on its own terms. So what we have is a violent actioneer chock full of punch ups, car chases and shooting. Sadly, the script isn't developed enough, and the Rocky elemnts so typical of Stallone's movies at this point, IE, the underdog hero who everyone is against, is used to the maxim here. Unlike the Rocky movies, the glare of humour isn't up to scratch, and so a great many of the lead characters are unlikeable. So what? Wasn't this the case with thrillers such as Seven or Resovoir Dogs? However, Rambo Director George Pan Cosmatos gives a fresh coat of paint to this particular movie, adding stylish touches of film noir to the action genre in a way that precceeds Face/Off (1997) and a whole host of successors. Bridgette Nielsen is the movies real surprise, giving a likeable and sincere performance as Helgar, under the watchful eye of her then Husband. What is really surprising is that Cosmatos manages to succesfully blend into the action genre touches of classic and contemporary horror movies such as Friday the Thirteenth and John Carpenters Halloween with the chilling depiction of the Night Slashers. The movie also contains some of the most exhilerating action and chase sequences, particularly in the movies climax, where Cobra lets rip unto the Night Slashers men. This is an under-rated gem, a very efficient Stallone/George Pan Cosmatos vehicle, and very possibly the best ever Menahem Golan, Yoram Globus/Cannon Film Group picture ever produced. .......................................................................

8/10
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Do you have a lifejacket?
SuperfluousChap9 April 2004
This picture is classic 1980s action at its best and most cliche. My favorite scene is right at the top of the movie. Cobra is in a supermarket, on the trail of a guy who's killing safeway employees for fun. Cobra's in pursuit. He passes a 6-foot display case of Coors light. Stops. Cracks a can. Takes a sip. Tosses it on the floor. Continues in pursuit.

It reminds me of another 80s action flick few will remember called the Punisher with Louis Gossett Junior. Some dufus is carrying pizza into the torture chamber where LGJ is getting it. EXCEPT HE'S NOT GETTING IT, guys. He's already knocked the guy out with a punch and a pressure point maneuver. Then, Gosset neutralizes the pizza guy. But rather than let the pizza, which is all over the floor, go to waste, he kneels down, takes a couple of pieces, bites, then leaves the room as though nothing has happened.

I learned a lot from Cobra and Stallone's character, Marion Cobretti. First, I need to get a "nitro" option on my car so I can go as fast as he did. Second is a great line to reel in the girl, next time you're out on a date and she's using too much catsup on her fries.

"Do you have a lifejacket?" "Why" "To save all the french fries that are drowning."

This movie is a classic for 80s action lovers. I own the DVD and highly recommend it.
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"This is where the law stops...and I start!"
AngusBeef21 January 2004
When I watch this movie now, it really brings back the days of my youth, when things like wacked-out cult members and maverick cops (that shoot first and ask questions later) seemed to be plausible career choices. Oh, do I remember the days of playing "guns" with my buddies and spewing some of the wretched one-liners from this masterpiece. With that, you may be thinking that I despise this movie, or that it doesn't hold up to today's high standards of movie-making. Actually, no. I love this thing! Every time I watch it, it gets better and funnier. Where once the lines of this film danced through my childhood dreams of punking bad guys in back alleys, they now leave me rolling on the ground with laughter. Hey, how can you not enjoy a little Stallone with a freaking match in his mouth and a wearing a pair of aviators spouting lines like, "You're a disease, and I'm the cure?" Not to mention, how could you not have seen this, what with TNT/TBS playing it about 35 times a year since 1990? Also, I love how people rip on how over-the-top and phony 80's movies are with all the explosions and the one-man-gang takedowns of entire armies (composed of the same five guys getting killed in different fashions). What makes me laugh is that today's movies are no more realistic. Have you seen anything with Vin Diesel in it? Bond anyone? Watching these movies too much could make anyone believe in the freaking Easter Bunny! Anyway if you haven't seen Cobra, please check it out.

**WARNING: DETAILED SYNOPSIS BELOW**

The movie begins with a sleazoid taking a supermarket hostage. In fact, just to show what a punk he is, he parks in a handicapped spot and shoots a nerdy kid in the back with a shotgun. So, how do the cops handle this mess? Enter: Marion "Cobra" Cobretti, complete with aviator sunglasses and matchstick in the mouth. He's tough, hard-nosed, and basically unemotional, kinda like Stallone. He enters the supermarket, gets on the intercom and admonishes the baddie by telling him, "Hey, dirtbag! You're a lousy shot! I don't like lousy shots! You wasted the kid...now it's time to waste you!" Man, if life were that simple. Judge. Jury. And executioner. But how could Sly have known he was auditioning for Judge Dredd way back in '86? Anyway, after a sip of beer from the display stand, Stallone finds himself face to face with the nutcase who threatens to blow the whole place up. Stallone deadpans, "Go ahead...I don't shop here." Before the guy can draw his gun, Stallone chucks a knife into the wacko's gut, but not before telling him, "I don't deal with psychos, I put 'em away."

Afterward, we find out that the dirtbag belonged to a cult that wants to wipe out the weak people of society. They bang axes together and try to look menacing; especially their leader who has a jaw that puts Chyna to shame. <Yikes.> However, some cops on the force think that Cobretti's methods are slightly archaic, and they let him know this, especially a weasely looking guy that really has it out for Cobretti.

Later, Ingrid (Brigitte Nielsen), a model, sees these pantyhose-over-the-face nutballs acing a girl under an overpass and fears for her life after she sees Jaws' face. Shortly, she is attacked by the cult after her photoshoot is done, but manages to escape their clutches and is put under police protection at the hospital. However, an attempt is made on Ingrid's life that is thwarted at the last minute by her pulling the fire alarm. As a result, Cobra believes that someone on the force leaked info to the cult. His solution is to move Ingrid to a safehouse, while he continues the investigation. Cobra and Ingrid get into one car, and Cobra's partner, Sgt. Gonzales, and a butt-ugly skank (the leak) get into another car and head to the safehouse. As to be expected, a move is made to eliminate Ingrid, albeit in broad daylight. In one of the most hilarious scenes I have ever seen in a movie, Stallone manages to spin his car while going full speed, never miss a beat, and continue to go full speed in reverse in order to riddle the pursuing cult members full of bullets. I don't know about you, but my car never does 60 when I back out of my driveway. Also, the close-up shots of Stallone's face while he shifts gears and glances at Ingrid are truly bad-a** and p*ss-your-pants hilarious!

After avoiding the meatheads for now, Sly and the Family Stallone, if you will, do it Cobra's way and head up to a motel room where they wait for the cult to show up. Obviously, they do since their nasty skeezer is riding shotgun to Gonzalez. Upon, finding them at the motel, the cult begins setting themselves up for Cobra to mow them down. Another chase leads them to some kind of metal factory where they can take on Stallone one by one. He gladly accepts the challenge by lasing-siting a grenade and acing a few culties. After being doused in some sort of flammable liquid, Number Two gets a lit match thrown onto him while Stallone slurs, "You have the right to remain silent." A man of few words, but amazingly such a wordsmith. Anyway, this all leads to the showdown between Big Jaw and Cobra. According to Sly, "This is where the law stops...and I start...sucker!" Wow! Good stuff. Blah! Blah! The typical fight ensues with Jaws getting the upperhand until Stallone hulks up (must have got it from Hogan on the set of Rocky III) and spears the guy on a huge hook. Then while the dude screams in agony, Sly watches him get incinerated in a huge oven. Now that's justice. Something to watch for during this finale: how many times Jaws says the word "PIG!" (with a bunch of slobber and cuds shooting out of his mouth, might I add.)

So if you're in the mood for a real side-splitter that was intended to be serious, check out Sly in his one man war on evil.
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5/10
Stallone vehicle in which Cobra decides to deal out justice in his own hands against maniacal killers
ma-cortes24 December 2009
This entry in ¨Vigilante genre¨ contains amount of action and excessive violence. It concerns about Cobra(Silvester Stallone) a Rambo-alike , a rebel and violent cop. Various people are killed by furious band led by a punk (Brian Thomson). Furthermore, a beautiful cover-up(Brigitte Nielsen) is witness a mugging by the heinous criminals. The nasties stalk the gorgeous youngster who is submitted to a brutal hot pursuit and the cop protects her . Then Cobra with sun-glasses and his classic car takes the law into his own hands, searching vengeance on crooks, hoodlums, muggers, making the neighborhood safer. Cobra is determined to bring in psychotic serial killer , even if he has to break some rules. Finally, happens an exciting, edge-of-your-seat climax .

This new outing in this thrilling genre contains suspense, thrills,chills, noisy action-packed, gun-play and lots of violence. Stallone with his usual stoic acting displays amount of weapons arsenal killing nasties. Appears as secondary casting, Brian Thomson as a heinous murderous and Andy Robinson and Art Le Fleur as superior officers who are constantly arguing with Cobra . Furthermore secondaries as Val Avery,Nina Axelrod, David Rasche and the director John Herzfeld, among others. Colorful and atmospheric cinematography by Ric Waite. Outdated musical score is composed by means of synthesizer and full of songs of the 80s. The motion picture is middling directed by George Pan Cosmatos. He's a mediocre director who got a great success with ¨Tombstone¨and ¨Cassandra crossing¨ and flops as ¨Shadow conspiracy¨, ¨Leviatahan¨, ¨Escape to Athena¨ and ¨Massacre in Rome¨. This typical low grade story will appeal to Silvester Stallone fans.
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5/10
Some brilliant sequences jammed between the mediocrity
fertilecelluloid27 December 2004
George Cosmatos, the director of the dim-witted RAMBO: FIRST BLOOD PART 2, directs this schizophrenic exercise in style with some aplomb.

The title sequence is simply stunning. DOP Ric Waite's images exist in some sort of surreal world that the film can't possibly contextualize. At magic hour, a bad guy on a motorcycle is intercut with ludicrous but gorgeous images of other bad guys (in suits, no less) ritualistically banging axe handles together in some underground warehouse in Los Angeles in time with a dark, brooding synth score

The sequence that follows, a madman's bullet-ridden assault on a supermarket, is again stunningly shot and staged and a triumph of style over anything you want to name.

Once these bravura sequences have passed, mediocrity and Hollywood Plotting 101 cuts in and we're pulled back into a dull reality.

But don't fret. Sit tight for long enough and you get an enthusiastically staged car chase with ducks, machine guns, classic cars bursting from buildings, a Santa who comes close to being roadkill and badly uttered Stallone lines.

Fast forward then to the film's climactic shootout on motorcycles and you're left with an action film that spends forty minutes doing everything right.

Stallone emotes with cruise control and his wife-at-the-time Brigitte Nielson just wears the clothes and moves from first position to second.
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A depressing reminder that for every rollicking action extravaganza like "Commando," we have a dozen more duds like "Cobra."
Li-115 April 2005
Rating: * 1/2 out of ****

Cobra is an 80s flick all the way, made back in the days when macho action flicks featuring one-man armies reigned supreme, so it's technically a movie that should be right up my alley. But watching it again for the first time in over ten years, it serves more as a reminder that making a macho classic isn't quite as easy as it seems, and why Schwarzenegger's Commando will always be the standard by which the one-man army genre will be judged. Hell, forget Commando, I'd estimate Cobra is only about half as good as Dolph Lundgren's The Punisher, if that says anything about where this rates in the annals of 80s macho action cinema.

Sylvester Stallone stars as Lieutenant Marion Cobretti, a trigger-happy L.A. cop who shows little mercy to the scum of society. Naturally, he's the perfect man to protect a model (Brigitte Nielsen) who's the target of the Night Slasher (Brian Thompson), the head of a nasty cult that wants to create a new world order. They've got their sights set on Nielsen because she saw the Night Slasher exerting one of his more intense facial expressions on a particularly dark night, and that's apparently enough to deem her an eyewitness to a murder she clearly didn't see.

Anyway, it's obvious how the rest of the movie will play out; Cobretti will make out with the model, somehow keep her completely unharmed even when getting the both of them into lots of chases and shootouts, and he'll kill all the scum before riding off with the "babe" into the proverbial sunset. If you think I'm giving too much away, then you definitely haven't seen enough action movies.

While its an unwritten rule that one usually doesn't watch these kinds of action movies for plot, I think it's fair to say that one at least hopes for a fairly consistent flow in its narrative, or for the writer (in this case, Stallone himself) to offer up a compelling MacGuffin that bridges the action scenes well enough to hold interest between the shoot 'em up action. No such luck here; a fair portion of the plot is structured around the cult and their serial killings, but the film just glances over the cult's motives, and what is revealed sounds like it was (badly) ad-libbed by Brian Thompson on the spot.

Just as bad is the main story revolving around Cobretti protecting the model. Despite being a real-life couple at the time, Stallone and Nielsen have no chemistry, making their scenes together painfully awkward and unconvincing. Even Schwarzenegger and Rae Dawn Chong worked way better together in Commando and there wasn't even any attempted romantic tension in that relationship. If you actually rooted for Cobretti and the chick to get together by the end, you are a better person than me.

Even with all these faults, what ultimately kills the movie is that it's just not much fun. The action scenes are fairly plentiful, and a few of them are even reasonably decent (the big car chase is well-shot and edited, and a later chase scene where Cobretti mows down a lot of bikers from the back of a pick-up truck hints at the fun flick this could have been if it had boasted more self-knowingly outrageous moments like that), but without any care towards plot or character, it's hard to get involved in all the mayhem, especially when a lot of these scenes are mired in boring clichés (the final showdown is set in a foundry; argghh, I hate that setting!).

Even worse is the fact that almost everyone involved seemed painfully unaware they were making pulpy escapist cinema. Aside from a few very unsuccessful one-liners, Cobra is too serious in tone to genuinely enjoy. A lot of action movies that take themselves seriously manage to work because of (at least mild) attention to plot and characters; without these elements, the laziness of the filmmakers becomes more obvious as we watch a film that wishes to be taken seriously (there's a half-hearted attempt at a message about the hypocrisy and ineffectiveness of justice) without going into the effort to deserve that merit, and that's just plain insulting.
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5/10
"I don't deal with psychos, I put them away!"
Nazi_Fighter_David13 April 2008
This time Sylvester Stallone is against a bunch of ax wielding serial killers, with nylons over their faces, who terrorize the LA nights…

When a fashion model happens to see the ugly face of a sadistic psychopath (Brian Thompson), Ingrid (Brigitte Nielsen) becomes the main target of the secret "New World" society stopping at nothing to slain her…

Lieutenant Marion Cobretti (Stallone), in his gun metal-gray classic Mercury, and armed with guns, knives, grenades, and firearms, is assigned to protect the statuesque blonde…

The movie is too violent and too bloody and contains one of the most interesting car chase sequences ever filmed…
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It says a lot on America in the mid-80's
Prune-328 August 2003
Cobra is not a good action film. Neither is it a good cop drama or a good buddy cop film. Cobra is something else. It is a testimonial of what the USA were about in the late Reagan era.

The film introduces us to Marion Cobretti, a cop with an attitude who won't respect the rules since they are made to protect the bandits, the killers and the rapists. He thinks that to fight those, he has to act like them.

That is how he gets into conflict with his boss, Monte who is presented as a liberal freak who'd rather let people get killed than to use violence on the evil men. In a particular scene, Cobretti and his colleague Gonzales are talking about how they'd like to punch a hole in this Monte's chest. They are half-joking about it but you still feel that those trigger-happy cops would pretty much be able to do it anytime if they felt like it.

That same Monte is also presented as the person responsible for hiring a traitor female cop and forcing Cobretti to work with her. The result of this is that Cobretti almost gets killed because of the left-wing tolerant attitude of this liberal superior.

At the end of the movie, Cobretti saves the day by using every technique he knows to exterminate his foes(shooting them, blow them up, put them on fire, etc.) and then goes to punch his liberal boss in the face.

What really fascinates me the most in this film is how those ideas were mainstream less than 20 years ago. How crowd were supposed to react positively to this final punch in the mouth making a statement that liberals were responsible for the rise of crime in our society.
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Rambo watch out
Kryptik Kritik15 October 2000
I do believe that "Cobra" first-appeared in theaters after the three or four Rambo films came out.This is definitely not Stallone's worst Film. It was deemed as one of the most violent, offensive mainstream movies of its era (1986) however it's a great flick for fans of exploitive films. After all how can you shy away from lines like: "You're the disease. I'm the cure." "This is where the law stops, and I begin." And there are some members from the old "Dirty Harry" cast, like Andrew Robinson, who played the vicious serial killer. Anyhow, it's worth the time to waste to catch it on cable or rent for 50 cents.
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2/10
If This Is The Cure, Keep The Disease
Bill Slocum16 April 2005
"You gotta have faith," a cop played by Sylvester Stallone tells a fearful woman he is guarding. Not only is he stealing George Michael's lyrics, Sly is also pinching his wardrobe: Black leather gloves and matching jacket, tight jeans, boots, reflective sunglasses and chin stubble. What Lt. Marion Cobretti is doing on witness protection detail while he could be cruising men's rooms is beyond me.

"Cobra" is a very '80s film, sort of a stupid cousin to the many "Dirty Harry" wannabes being pumped out at the time. The plot is ridiculous even by the weak standards of this genre. A gang of axe-wielding psychos are taking out those they view as "weak" in pursuit of a New World Order. Man, you couldn't wake up any morning in the 1980s without hearing about some new gang of serial killers busting out.

At least Lt. Cobretti is on the job. Better known as "Cobra" or "the Cobra," he carries a special pistol with a cobra head illustration on the handle stock, not to mention an attitude, "just a little one," as he himself admits. Machine guns, grenades, all are found in his tool box, but he keeps a matchstick in his mouth instead of a cigarette, so kids won't get bad ideas.

The killer gang doesn't seem all that subtle, attacking one waitress inside her car on a city street. Yet they carefully guard their privacy to the point that when their facially-deformed leader is glancingly spotted in the act by a model played by Brigitte Nielsen, he pulls out all the stops to kill her. Sending his minions out to get whacked by the Cobra, the psycho sneaks into a hospital where she is being looked after. We get shades of "Halloween II" as she runs for her life through deserted corridors. You'd think he'd give up, especially as he risks being spotted by others trying to kill this one witness, but no, this guy continues after her through the movie, Ahab in a stocking mask.

Yes, indeed, "Cobra" is one stupid film. It's also unpleasant in its stale echoes of reactionary politics, punchy in its attempts at humor, and threadbare in terms of character and motivation. One police supervisor played by Andy Robinson (one of two actors from the cast of "Dirty Harry," Cobra sidekick Reni Santori being the other) whines about Cobra's strong arm tactics, which Cobretti effectively counters by physically assaulting him - twice.

What's good here? The lighting is very effective, giving the film a glitzy sheen very in tune with the time. Though his acting is stiff, Stallone never looked better, which may be why he does so little with his character – too busy vogueing. The cars and equipment are cool to look at, and there are some terrific stunts.

But the stunts are done in service of action scenes that don't work. Cobra fights off human-wave style attacks by dozens of motorcyclists who seem to be competing for the best wipe-out. The big shootout at the end is unbelievably protracted, with Cobra hitting everything he aims at with a snub machine gun while not one of the dozens of shootists firing at him manage much of anything.

"This whole sorry ordeal is some damn sick joke if you ask me," Robinson's police supervisor complains. Actually, "Cobra" isn't played as a joke at all, but very straight, a big part of the problem. One useful aspect of "Cobra" is it gives the lie to the phrase "mindless entertainment." In order to be entertaining, a mind has to be working somewhere. When one isn't, the result is this.
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Only the greatest action movie of time!
cranialblowout15 May 2003
Warning: Spoilers
* MILD SPOILERS* In possibly the greatest characterisation ever seen on screen, beating even Welles' Citizen Kane, Sylvester Stallone sizzles onto the screen in his blistering answer to Clint Eastwood's over-rated "Dirty Harry" series. Swaggering onto the screen wearing a unique style of clothes that will never go out of fashion, Sly effortlessly portrays a cool streetwise cop who's not taking no s**t from nobody. From the opening monologue until the dazziling final sequence, Stallone delivers the kind of script Scorsese could only have wet dreams about making. The film moves from one incredible set piece to another: the tale of a brutal gang of rapists and murderers terrorising the city is the perfect set up for high-octane action that rivals the Matrix for sheer razzle-dazzle, and offers us deep insights into the human soul. In his gun-point musings with the "Night Slasher" - one of cinemas truley under-rated villans - Cobra muses "I'm not [civillised]. This is where the law stops and I start" offering us the oppertunity to ask when can the police cross the line? Is there a line? Should there be a line? If so where? And in Sly's delivery of "Hey dirtbag, you wasted that kid for nothing. Now I think it's time to waste you!" you can see into Cobra's very soul, even with the sunglasses on.

All in all, this is possibly the GREATEST film of all time, and it's place in the bargin bin of Blockbusters is an injustice of Cosmic proprtions.

My one gripe: why does Cobra have to have a girlie first name? I mean, Marion? What's that all about?

98% great.
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10/10
pride of the zombiesquad
buriedbydust13 December 2004
This is THE movie!!!Sly who also wrote the screenplay did a really good job.I really love this movie, especially the one-liners!!!"this is where the law stops..and I start" or "I'll blow the whole place up..go ahead I don't shop here". Sly plays the role as Cobra more than convincing. He is really the pride of the zombiesquad. Brian Thompson does an excellent job as the Nightslasher, the personification of evil. He looks really scary. Even the soundtrack is great. Listen to hits like "Angel of the city" and you know what I mean. I would put this movie as number one in my top ten action movies, next to Commando. I am sorry that a sequel never was made. Buy this movie, you wont regret!
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1/10
Take it out back and shoot it
j30bell2 February 2005
Every now and then I get an urge: I don't like to talk too much about it, but there it is, lurking… this urge. I can't tell my girlfriend, and once I've satisfied the urge, well, naturally, I feel quite disgusted with myself. You understand, though, I can't help it… I should explain. Mostly the urge involves turning down the lights, flicking on the TV and baying snobbishly and unpleasantly for 90minutes at films like Cobra. So far, I haven't found a support group for this compulsion, but I'm looking into it.

So I suppose in some ways I should feel grateful to Cobra because if films like this didn't exist, I should be forced to watch Star Wars again. And while this would undoubtedly sate my feelings of smug superiority, it would nonetheless be masochism, and I have enough of a problem with my urge as it is.

I suppose I should feel grateful, but part of the problem with my condition is that I can't. Cobra has to be one of the worst films ever made. If the illegitimate child of Miami Vice and Dirty Harry mated violently with the less poetically inclined twin of the Death Wish brothers it might bear nagging resemblance to Cobra. Cobra is living proof that, were it possible to surgically remove the 1980s from the sphere of human history (thereby losing my childhood, Gandhi, Bladerunner and Live Aid) it would be a price worth paying.

Both dialogue and delivery make the fromage of Bruce Willis positively Shakespearian in comparison. Take the following line as a sample: "Hey dirt bag, you wasted that kid for nothing. Now I think it's time to waste you!" or perhaps the following (Killer)"The court is civilized, isn't it pig?" (Sly) "But I'm not. This is where the law stops and I start - sucker!" Sly got a screen writing "credit" for this film, by the way. I mean, Rocky isn't exactly Hamlet, but what a comedown. It's incredible to think that two scant years later Die Hard was in the cinemas.

What is more extraordinary about Cobra is that the performances, camera-work and score are more lame than the script.

Anyway, unless you suffer from a similar compulsion to mine, avoid this film. It shares the credit with Commando for being the sphincter of 1980s cinema – and boy – as mister 'cott would say - that's saying summut. 1/10
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10/10
Cobra
starwarskid199229 May 2009
Stallone brings another famous character, Marion Cobretti to the silver screen. Yes, he shares the first name with John Wayne.

Cobra is L.A.'s toughest cop, the leader of the Zombie Squad, a special team that deals with the strangest crimes. A ax-wielding gang is hitting the streets and taking out citizens, Ingrid (Brigette Neilsen) witnesses a murder by them and goes to Cobra. The gang tries to kill them several times but fails, they escape from the city and prepare for a final showdown.

Stallone once again delivers the goods with his films. Cobra is one of his most memorable because of it's over the top madness. Hell, Stallone even teamed up with Golan & Globus (Cannon Films) for this one. Many memorable lines and action scenes including "You're a disease, and I'm the cure" and the finale. My second favorite Stallone movie next to Demolition Man. Thank you Mr. Stallone for Cobra.

A perfect 5 out of 5.
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10/10
TREMENDOUS
da_nike_king228 April 2001
Cobra is one of my favourite ever movies.A lot of people have poor comments about this movie,but if u like STALLONE-this is classic.There is INCREDIBLE ACTION.Cobra is the type of movie SCHWARZENEGGER dreamed of doing.Stallone also wrote the screenplay.check the cover!--STALLONE.COBRA!Check out his car!.CRIME IS A DISEASE-STALLONE IS THE CURE-CALL THE COBRA!
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10/10
A Movie For People who like Action Movies
manasia2 June 2003
This movie was fantastic and a brilliant representation of it's genre ACTION. The plot was half decent, and the action was good. Why do PEOPLE TRY TO ANALYZE ACTION MOVIES??!?!!? Action movies are not plot driven people, when will u wake up!

Cobra is off the chain.
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1/10
Cinematic Hell
JimS_868611 March 2008
Warning: Spoilers
It's been quite some time since I had the misfortune of suffering through Cobra. But unfortunately, it is a difficult experience to completely forget. Kind of like that first time you accidentally stepped in a big pile of dog crap.

Stallone plays the absurdly named title character, "Marion Cobretti", who is responding to a hostage standoff in a supermarket when the movie opens. The first 15 minutes of this pathetic excuse for an action film must hold some sort of record for having the most product placements in movie history. From Coors Beer to 7up. This rapid fire montage of continuous product placement eventually culminates with Cobretti returning home after the unexciting opening sequence. There, he cuts off a sliver of Pizza Hut pizza as he sits down in front of a TV, where he proceeds to watch an entire commercial for Toys-R-Us.

The remainder of this wretched movie plays like a cross between a bad 80's MTV music video and an even worse Dirty Harry ripoff. Stallone casts as his love interest his then-wife Brigette Nielsen, who would soon divorce him and take him to the cleaners. The villains have zero dimension and are basically nothing more than props for Stallone to spray bullets at.

As with most other Stallone action films, there is never any sense of excitement or danger because you know that no bullet will ever come close to nicking him, and no bad guy will ever be a worthy match in a street fight.

Just like in any number of his "original" screenplays, Stallone the writer comes up with one outrageously corny line of dialogue for his character to mutter. The entire movie revolves around this moment, which coincidentally happened to be the tag line: "Crime is a disease and I'm the cure".

All the clichés are here: renegade cop who plays by his own rules, inability to obey orders from his superiors, yet idolized by his fellow officers on the force. Cobretti's blow-dried hairdo is forever perfectly moussed and will never get disheveled amidst all the mayhem and chaos as he wipes out the mysterious gang of thugs after his love interest. Forget about action, Cobra plays more like a comedy without laughs.

Horrible movies are the disease. Stallone retiring from acting and film-making is the cure.
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