John Cleese: Brian Stimpson
Brian Stimpson : It's not the despair, Laura. I can take the despair. It's the hope I can't stand.
Brian Stimpson : [repeated line; last lines] LEFT, no RIGHT, no LEFT...
Brian Stimpson : My office - 9:20 - Executions!
Brian Stimpson : The first step to knowing who we are... is knowing where we are and... WHEN we are.
Brian Stimpson : We don't need a track. It's grass.
[Mr. Stimpston is looking for a tractor]
Ivan with the Tractor : Hey, guess what I'm sitting on!
Brian Stimpson : A bomb, I hope!
Ivan with the Tractor : Alright then. You go that way and I'll go this way, and I'll bet you this jam tart... that I'll find a tractor first.
[drives away on tractor]
Brian Stimpson : [ringing bell at the monastery] Oh come on please! Turn the bloody record player down for God's sake!
Brian Stimpson : [the window opens] Now, hello, would you have a tractor would you?
Monk : One moment.
Brian Stimpson : Now, er...
[looks around the place]
Brian Stimpson : Ooh dear, a monastery. I might have guessed!
Brian Stimpson : Well where is she now?