I don't know what people are smoking to give this a 7/10. I saw this on Movieplex ( so I already knew I was in trouble ). One of the running gags on King of the Hill is a Mexican TV show all the characters watch called "Monsignor Martinez", about a vigilante priest who fights crime. Basically, "Hell Town" is a two-hour version of Monsignor Martinez, except that it wasn't meant to be funny.
The fact that Robert Blake is playing a priest is funny enough. If you could imagine Robert DiNero trying to play Michael Landon's role in Highway to Heaven, you might get a sense of Blake's performance. No word can come out of his mouth that doesn't sound like it should be in Goodfellas.
The best ( as in worst ) lines are his soliloquies where he talks to God. They're so overdone, they're painful. There's a scene where he's in a strip club watching the dancer do her thing, and he says ( paraphrasing ) "God, I thought after I became a priest, these urges would go away!" Of course, since it was the 80's, they couldn't resist the urge to give him a car that nobody ever, ever drives in real life ( especially a priest ). It was some 30's or 40's Chevrolet Woody-looking thing, in perfect condition of course. So after this priest would tough-talk the local gangs, or the cops who thought he was getting in their way, he'd drive off in his Woody like he was heading for the beach.
Not only was Blake miscast in this movie, but his performance was just bad. It was completely stilted. It was like watching an Ed Wood movie where these bad actors try to give these serious performances centered around a ridiculous premise.
It was good for a laugh, but as for recommending it, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
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