Christina

Original title: Christina y la reconversión sexual

19841984
UnratedUnrated
1h 31min

The world's most notorious heiress and bachelorette is kidnapped from the Italian countryside. Will she survive the ordeal?The world's most notorious heiress and bachelorette is kidnapped from the Italian countryside. Will she survive the ordeal?The world's most notorious heiress and bachelorette is kidnapped from the Italian countryside. Will she survive the ordeal?

4.5/10

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The world's most notorious heiress and bachelorette is kidnapped from the Italian countryside. Will she survive the ordeal?

topless female nudity female frontal nudity sex abduction multiple lovers 169 more

Trivia
Star Jewel Shepard wrote in her 2013 website blog about her career roles and nude scenes: My supreme starring (undraped) role to date was in a direct-to-Playboy Channel flick called Christina, which, nakedness aside, could be marketed as an over-the-counter sleep aid. It was shot all over Europe with what the press book called "a multinational crew," which means that no two people involved spoke a common language. I was promised "tasteful nudity," which in this case meant that I got to be topless in front of the Eiffel Tower. We shot it when there were no gendarmes about, on a dreary morning with the temperature hovering around eight degrees. And that's Fahrenheit. All I can recall is that my nipples looked liked the pop-up timers on Butterball turkeys, and there were tourists taking photos and muttering; "Now this is what Paris should be like." Whereas for some films you negotiate how much nudity you'll do, on this picture I actually found myself haggling to be clothed in one or two scenes, and I had to bargain with the man who held my return ticket. (I had previously disabused him of the notion, which he claimed to have learned in film school, that more of the budget can be put "on the screen" if the leading lady shares her hotel room with the producer.) At one point, I had to single-handedly defeat several armed ninja assassins. The director thought it would help the scene if I was naked.

Quotes
narrator: Meet Christina von Belle. Unquestionably one of the world's richest women, and also one of the most controversial. Heiress to an imnense fortune, head of a worldwide publishing empire, Christina is seldom out of the news.
Christina: [on phone] Hello?
[chuckles]
narrator: Tell me, Miss Van Belle, how does it feel to already possess what most people dream about?
Christina: It can be rather boring
narrator: And what do you dream about?
Christina: That's my secret.
[big smile]
narrator: But you must have certain preferences?
Christina: Confidentially... I like men.
[walks over to her latest paramour, kisses him]
Christina: And they like me too.
narrator: [as the young lady pilots speedboat, obviously topless] Christina believes in exposing the facts. The bare facts. And quite frequently, the naked truth.

Alternate versions
The UK version had to be cut by 11 seconds to remove a scene in which a horse's head was hit by a motorcycle, as this breached the Cinematograph Films (Animals) Act 1937.

Top review

2/10

Other films of this genre are much more enjoyable.

This is a Spanish film from which it appears that Christina is an extremely affluent young lady who fancies herself as a private eye. We are told that there are a large collection of novels about her that are extremely popular in Europe. We are also told this is the first of them which has been filmed, but that many more are on their way and should be appearing soon. However this film was released some time ago (1984), and as far as I know we have so far been spared from any second offering. May this happy state long continue. Similar films to Christina have appeared many times in the past but have usually been significantly better in quality. For example, one need only think of the 1970's Ginger series which, even though they did not score very heavily with either the critics or regular filmgoers, were far more polished and enjoyable to watch than Christina.

I saw this film listed as a late night offering on a local TV channel and guessed that it would be in Spanish with English sub-titles. Such films can be very valuable in helping to learn the language concerned, and so I decided to tape it. Unfortunately I guessed wrong, it was dubbed in English, and I did not even receive this limited return for the time I wasted watching it. The screenplay was farcical and the acting almost non-existent. Since it is now 20 years since Christina was released, we may perhaps assume that this film "bombed" and the threat of any similar follow up films is lifting. But should this ever again be considered, its perpetrators should be forced to watch "The Avengers" or even "Charlie's Angels" until they have some concept of what can make a featherweight film of this genre enjoyable to watch..

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