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Title: Private School (1983)
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| Cast overview, first billed only: | |||
| Phoebe Cates | ... | Christine | |
| Betsy Russell | ... | Jordan | |
| Matthew Modine | ... | Jim | |
| Michael Zorek | ... | Bubba | |
| Fran Ryan | ... | Miss Dutchbok | |
| Kathleen Wilhoite | ... | Betsy | |
| Ray Walston | ... | Chauncey | |
| Sylvia Kristel | ... | Ms. Copuletta | |
| Jonathan Prince | ... | Roy | |
| Kari Lizer | ... | Rita | |
| Richard Stahl | ... | Mr. Flugel | |
 |
Julie Payne | ... | Coach Whelan |
| Frank Aletter | ... | Mr. Leigh-Jensen | |
| Frances Bay | ... | Birdie Fallmouth | |
|
|
Bill Wray | ... | Bandleader |
Christine (Phoebe Cates), a student at an exclusive all-girls private school, is in love with Jim, who attends an academy for boys nearby. Christine's arch rival Jordan also has her eye on Jim, and she is willing to do whatever she can to steal him away. Jim's uber-slob buddy Bubba is going with Betsy, Christine's cynical friend, though he would probably be unfaithful if any other woman were willing to get near him. Bubba and his pals sneak into the girls' school dressed in drag in hopes of reaching the Promised Land (better known as the women's shower room), while Christine and Jim run away together for the weekend, though their escapade isn't as romantic as they had hoped. Written by Anonymous
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A very raunchy and crude high school romantic sex comedy starring two luscious hotties in the immensely sweet Phoebe Cates and the wickedly memorable Betsy Russell. After seeing it, how can you forget Russell's topless horse riding scene and the saucy seduction of Matthew Modine's character. Yes tongues would be hanging! Wait on guys also featuring is sexpot Sylvia Kristel (well known for the 'Emmanuelle' series) as, just wait the sex education teacher. Immature minds maybe, but you should know the target audience it's aiming for.
As for the cornball story, it's rather slight with characters coming and going doing their own things with running gags, cheesy set-ups, plenty of flowing nudity and episodic set-pieces. It's the same old high-jinx that remain amusing due to the cast committing themselves and Noel Black's direction being so spiritedly random. There are moments of awkwardness (with many daggy dialogues) and tackiness, but it was hard to keep a smile off my face. I really liked the classy Ray Walston (who a year earlier appeared in the classic teen comedy with Cates; 'Fast Times at Ridgemont High') short, but funny cameo. Matthew Modine was likable enough and Michael Zorek was humorous as a horn-dog. Kathleen Wilhoite (in her film debut) was a cheeky delight as Cates' room-mate/friend and Fran Ryan was terrific as the prudish headmistress. There's also fine additional support by Jonathan Prince, Julie Payne, Richard Stahl, Frank Aletter, Frances Bay and Karen Chase. Look out for a risible appearance by Martin Mull as drug store clerk.
Now the soundtrack is a complete blast. Catchy, hip and upbeat bubblegum sound that's always (well nearly) playing in the background with many old tunes revamped. It's like a record, with someone taking the needle off for a short break to only rip back in to it again. You got the 'Stray Cats', 'Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs' (probably of the favourite of the lot), 'Harry Nilsson', 'Rick Springfield', 'Bow-Wow-Wow' and 'Vanity 6' to name a few.
It's no classic, but a vibrantly charming 80s high school teen sex comedy outing that can't do no wrong.